How often do you meet someone you really like on OLD?

[Eternal Sunshine]

.............

[JuneL]

 

In the 1.5 years I’ve been on OLD I met one girl I wanted to be with long term. I had some red flags a month in, but at about 4 months I just couldn’t take her anymore (selfish, immature, entitled, temper tantrums, demanding, not particularly intelligent).

 

It was really a shame because she had a lot of the qualities I was looking for in a partner.

 

 

These two statements seem to contradict with each other

[SevenCity]

These two statements seem to contradict with each other

 

No, I listed the bad qualities that made me leave her.

 

Some of the good qualities were still there (loved dogs, loyal, good in bed (until the selfishness came out), beautiful, good cook) but many of them were just an act.

 

People keep up a facade when they are first dating. After they get comfortable the real person comes out.

 

The way our first month went I was sure I would marry this girl. After the third month I was sure I would never speak to her again.

[No_Go]

About once an year seems right. But I never had over 4 dates an year: therefore the ratio is 25%, not that bad.

 

This year for me marks a magical happening to encounter 2 guys I like which hasn’t happened in my 33 year life history so far So the progress is there

[Fair]

There was only once when the feeling was mutual. And I've been on and off OLD quite frequently since about 2011.

 

That said, nothing ever came of it.

 

I think it's rare that it's actually "mutual". I've fooled myself into thinking I had mutual interest from a guy lately only to realize he was only looking for a "Barbara Anne"... (referring to the beach boys song with the line 'help me get her out of my heart")

 

I like a new guy on OLD right now who has been lavishing me with emails... short, keep her on the hook only, type emails all of them sent during the week... while disappearing off the face of the earth come the weekend.

 

Anyhoo... I think I have a crush on my neighbor and he's single and in the flesh... a possible better prospect than any wishy-washy weasel from OLD.

 

I can't help but laugh remembering the poster who said hearing "online dating success stories, was like hearing bigfoot stories..." That's pretty much how I feel. In 2018 I intend to meet a real live man to keep instead of a lousy photo.

[Purepony]

I’ll admit there has been some good flings but there’s always the driving 60 plus miles away and dinner etc

[Juha]

I am pretty much done with OLD, found it to be to time consuming

with little roi for my time.

 

Have taken a break from dating, not really having any luck and getting aggravated.

 

Also, at my age seem to have missed my window to finding someone to have a great relationship with and have a child or two.

 

Options are minimal, at best now with my age...

 

Not in a good place right now....

[Juha]

I'm off dating sites now, maybe for good, but it's been rare for me. One a year if I'm lucky.

 

It's easy to get dates and shallow connections, not easy to find a quality connection of depth.

 

Totally 100% true!!!

[Juha]

This is what I don't get. No one has to do OLD, they choose to. The old-fashioned way of dating is still viable, not to mention others that people completely overlook for whatever reason. I tried OLD, had no real luck and stopped using it. End of story. It's like people are addicted to it or something.

 

Well, people are so busy these days, not going out much.

 

you almost have to do OLD to even have a chance to meet someone to date.

Regular, real life dating is really hard as people are to busy...

[SevenCity]

Too busy to go to work? Too busy to eat lunch? I think that people are just too lazy, not too busy. Lazy, so sitting around in their underwear sending messages to people who will never date them seems like a better plan than talking to people in the real world. I get that, I really do. Problem is, it doesn't seem to be working. Meanwhile, you likely encounter plenty of single people every day and ignore them.

 

Lol. I think the draw of old is it feels like you are at least trying.

 

I’m too busy to get lunch, I’m exhausted both ways on my commute. The other day this chick on the train kept staring at me. I didn’t feel like hitting on her infront of the 5 people sitting next to us (nor did I feel like being trapped in a 45 minute conversation) but I ran into her on the way out and tried talking. She seemed to be completely uninterested as I gave her opportunities to ask something about me and she didn’t bite at all.

 

So I tried. This is the first time I saw a woman I would like to date in a while and was actually in a position to speak with her.

[SevenCity]

You have to make opportunities. I do it now without even trying since I've been doing it for so long. In the past week or so, I have had one woman hit on me on FB one night because she and I were talking about something a mutual friend posted. Another girl on FB invited me back to her place a couple days ago because she used to have a crush on me years ago and again...mutual friends on FB. Lastly, I was in a store with my GF the other day and evidently, some girl kept staring at me and she started chatting while we were in her line. If I was a single guy or a slightly less faithful one, I would just go back to that same store and talk to her more. Facebook alone is an absolute gold mine when it comes to finding people to date. Almost everyone is on there and they don't have their guard up like they do on OLD sites.

 

“Slightly less”

 

I don’t have Facebook so that’s a dead end for me.

 

Funny you mention about the chick at the store. The ONLY time I see women I would like to date who are expressing interest is when I am with another woman. It’s happened so many times in the past year it’s uncanny.

 

Last time was with the girl I was seeing and we were at home goods. This super cute chick was staring me up and down and even got between me and the girl I was with to get something.

 

I have never been good and picking up a girl when with another. It’s funny how women tend to find you more attractive when you appear unavailable

[Purepony]

You have to make opportunities. I do it now without even trying since I've been doing it for so long. In the past week or so, I have had one woman hit on me on FB one night because she and I were talking about something a mutual friend posted. Another girl on FB invited me back to her place a couple days ago because she used to have a crush on me years ago and again...mutual friends on FB. Lastly, I was in a store with my GF the other day and evidently, some girl kept staring at me and she started chatting while we were in her line. If I was a single guy or a slightly less faithful one, I would just go back to that same store and talk to her more. Facebook alone is an absolute gold mine when it comes to finding people to date. Almost everyone is on there and they don't have their guard up like they do on OLD sites.

 

 

Yeah wait till your single then the tables turn

[Chilli]

Least ya tried her SC. You'd always wonder if ya didn't right .

But yeah , people , women , guys , anyone , stare for all kinds of reasons.

Once on a train this guy was staring at me and in the end l said mate, l'm not effg gay ,ok . l was tired and in a bit of a bad mood.

He says oh shyt no no neither am l sorry about that.

l'm a hair dresser, l was studying your haircut.

 

The date site thing , yeah , God only knows. Amazing how many times l've read even round here though of someone getting married from one.

 

l was only on one a few mths before l met my gf after divorce , somewhere else, but they sure seemed like a long shot to me.

 

and l just joined it again a few weeks ago , talked to a few went and met one but just this last wk or two l gotta admit, there's someone atm that is soooo spesh, from the minute l found her she's my thing head to toe and inside out.

l don't know yet , it might fizzle, earlier l thought it did but she's full of very pleasant surprises so far soooo,we see.

 

Thing is though , for me dates sites are only about exactly that , it's a long shot, don't hold ya breath but you just never do know and by some very very very very slim chance you might just come across that one in a million so that's why l joined it.

.

Edited December 25, 2017 by Chilli

[act00]

I have met some really nice people, despite it not working out, sometimes no second date, sometimes no third. This really sucks when you think you hit it off. Obviously he felt differently. The longest relationship I've had through OLD has been 3 months. My experiences, even though many don't go beyond that initial meet, is really good. Nice guys, some drink, some food, maybe some smooching.

 

It's a bit of a bummer, but it's really the best venue for me to meet people, as I don't go out much and don't have much opportunity to meet singles my age. The challenge at my age is that men are either married or newly divorced and not necessarily interested in pursuing long-term. Some men have extremely young children, and I'm so not interested in that. Right now I'm off the grid...need a break. I'm focusing on trying to lose some weight and just be a better me. I'll probably jump back in, in a couple months after things slow down with work and we get through the holidays.

[SevenCity]

Hey, I am still human. The girl wasn't beautiful but she was cute, young, and had some very noticeable assets in her favor.

 

 

 

Get Facebook. Absolutely awesome way to meet women. Just build a friend's list and be patient.

 

 

 

Yeah, I have noticed the same thing. There is an episode of Seinfeld where George used a pic of Jerry's ex to help him land hot women and it worked for him. In my experience, it works in real life too. I was dating this stupidly gorgeous girl a while back and other women would look me up and down. I even had 2 different women later on tell me that they knew they weren't my type because they had previously seen me with that bombshell. I think that it just raises your value to them. A female wingman can be a big help sometimes as long as she doesn't try to block you.

 

Hitting on women in public isn't about just asking her out. You have to give them the chance to get to know you first. That's how I always did it.

 

“Man hands”

 

For years I’ve avoided the whole concept of FB. I really have no desire to share my personal life with the world. Nor do I have pictures or anything PG rated that I could post. I have limited friends now as people just annoy me for the most part. That said, I’m not even sure where I would start a FB page and would have like 3 friends. If it’s a good way to meet chicks though I might consider it. Any advice would be appreciated.

 

I should also note I’ve never had problem meeting women and the longest I have been without companionship is about a month my entire life. It just seems now holds much less opportunity than in the past. I’d blame it on my age but I’m in better shape and dress better than I did in the past. It’s just rare I want to approach a woman.

 

A female wingman (person?) is a great idea but either they want to have sex with me (and I usually oblige), they are too jealous, or just have no interest in being friends.

 

I think I have to work on hitting on other women while with one. That behavior always befuddled me about women. I am actually turned off when I see a girl with a guy. I have no desire for sloppy seconds lol. My friends and I used to joke that women could smell the p*ssy on you as it would happen even if they weren’t with you if you were super happy with them. Aloofness? Confidence? Apathy? Who knows.

[Ruby Slippers]

I always get a lot more interest from other men when I'm in a relationship. The better-looking my man, the more aggressively other men are trying to catch my interest. I'm loyal and would never stray, but it does have a way of keeping my man on his toes.