Can't seem to let go of my wonderful ex

[shmeilz14]

My ex and I were together for a year and a half. I still can't believe that I'm actually writing about me NOT being with her, but thats besides the point. We're both 21. We truly were best friends. For that year and half if you saw one of us you saw the other, we were inseparable. (I now know that may not been healthy) but I loved her and she made everything that much more enjoyable. We had out fights, mostly drunken, but the good times far outweighed the bad. She was everything to me, my baby, my partner in crime (figuratively), my lover, and my friend. No one in this world could have made me any happier than her. From the first day we met till the days after our breakup there hadn't been a day we didn't talk to eachother, we just clicked and it was an incredible feeling knowing there was someone out there who seemed perfect for me.

 

Unfortunetly what once began as a fresh and intriguing relationship became almost routine and monotonous. For the last month or so it seemed we were just doing the same things and being with eachother almost began to seem like a need rather than a joy. It was like we almost didn't know what to do if we weren't with eachother. Well after a few fights and a few questionable moves on her part (I thought so) I decided to break it off. And she agreed!! I almost couldn't believe it. I know we were both feeling pressured but the thought of not having her was harder than being unhappy with her. I was crushed.

 

The initial breakup wasn't bad at all, no name calling, no screaming, no falling outs it was about as amicable as any breakup could be. We both cried, told eachother we loved eachother with all our heart and that this is what we needed as much as it hurts.

 

The first few weeks after we broke up we still talked off and on. A few times a week, we even went down the shore a few times to the house she was supposed to be live in with my friends and me. Needless to say it didn't take long for me to feel that I made the biggest mistake and that all I wanted was this girl in my life. Unfortunetly the feeling wasn't reciprocated, she became set on the fact that "she needed her time, to find out who she was and what made her happy."

 

As much as I didn't like it I began to give her space. I didn't call, no texts, no emails, nothing. We began to go on with our separate lives as hard as it was for me. For the first month or so she would call a few times a week, usually on the weekends and I wouldn't pick up. I turned my cell off to prevent myself from constantly looking at it to see if she called. I'd call her back and most of the times it was me doing all the talking, askin her what she did, how her weekend was, tellin her what I did, subtle stabs at trying to get back together, but after a while she would say she had to go and I was left wanting to talk to her more than ever. This went on for a few weeks and after a while talking to her became more painful than not.

 

One week she called and said she was planning on coming down my shore house for the weekend with a few friends of hers. But she wasn't coming down to see me but for her friend's birthday. I said I really didn't think that was a good idea, in that I just wouldn't be able to see her as a friend. As far as I could see, it was a lose lose situation. If she came down and we had a good time I'd be upset we weren't together AND if she came down and we were just friends I would go crazy, I just couldn't go to bed in the same house as her without havin her sleep right beside me. I asked her if she planned on just acting as friends and she said yea, so I had to say no. She wasn't happy and we got off the phone a little hurt by the other.

 

Well long story short she went down the shore to a friends of hers, a guys at that, with a few friends. Let me say I was a little suspicious of this guy while her and I were together. She went down on a Friday and came back home on Sunday. I also went down for the same amount of time and returned home to a voicemail from her sounding upset. I returned the call and she ended up coming over my house upset and crying about what was going on. I comforted her told her everything would work its way out and once again I asked her if she wanted to give it another go. Although she was upset she said no, I accepted and told her I would always be there for her.

 

The next week she began to text and call regularly just to say hi and to say that she was happy we talked. I began to feel good about the situation and I invited her to spend a weekend with me at the beach to celebrate my friend's 21st. She accepted and we had a great weekend, holding hands, kissing, sleeping together, laughing, telling jokes, everything was great. She began to tell me how much she loved me again and that she missed me. I, although hesitant about why she was saying this, said the same things.

 

When we got back from the shore however I found out that she kissed another guy the previous weekend, I say kissed because I try not to think of anything else. I confronted her about it and she cried, pleaded and said it was a mistake that she was drunk and mad and that it was just a kiss and it didn't mean anything. I seeing as I could do the same thing forgave her. She was with me and thats all that mattered. She even called the guy and told him she made a mistake, in front of me. We spent the entire week together, things seemed like they were back to normal but then I got another gut check.

 

I went down the shore and she told me she was gonna come down the next day, because she had work the day I left. Well she called that night said she loved me and she'd see me tomorrow but when tomorrow came she never showed. I called and got no answer. She called back and told me she went down the shore just not to my house but to another guy friend's of hers! I was so hurt I can't even explain. I said that was it, no more contact. I had to say goodbye and I did. I wrote her a letter, took it to her house, and she came out as soon as I got to the door. I asked what happened, she said I went to see a friend, I said ok I guess this is goodbye and i gave her a kiss on the forehead and left. We didn't speak for two weeks.

 

She imed me a few weeks later and asked if I want to talk, and I said ok. We talked and it once again consisted of me talking and her crying and getting upset and saying she couldn't do this bc it was too hard. I was hurt again and we hung up.

 

A few weeks later she calls again, I don't pick up, and she leaves a text sayin she called and that she guesses I dont want to talk to her anymore. We end up talkin, her cryin telling me this is just as hard for her as it is me, and we decide to meet up later. Yet once again when the time comes i call and shes no where to be found. Hurt again.

 

The next week is her birhtday. On her bday I do nothing, no texts, calls, nothing. Needless to say at the end of the day I have 3 missed calls and 3 texts sayin she wishes I was there to take care of her and that she loves how I make her feel like she meant nothing.

 

The next day we ended up goin out to eat, and I asked if she still loved me or if she wanted to get back. She said not now and I said ok well then you have to stop calling or texting me. She said "ok so that its" and I told her that it was her choice. She dropped me off we hugged for a long time, cried, and kissed goodbye. I left only to find a text from her 15 minutes later saying 'I will always love you and please never forget about me" I didn't answer so she called and I was mad that she wouldn't stop, she said alright this is the last time I'll call and i said ok.

 

A few days later she calls again and i pick up (I couldn't help it). Once again she cried and said sometimes she wants to run right back but feels like she has to be on her own right now. I said well then come back, and she said she feels that after all thats happened all we'll do is fight. I alright well I've tried as hard as I could to get back and now its done. She then said I hardly tried to get her back. She apologized for hurting me and said that if I never needed anything she would always be there. We told eachother we loved eachother and got off. That was a week ago.

 

NOW IF YOU'VE HELD ON THIS LONG I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO OR FEEL. RIGHT NOW IM JUST TRYIN TO STOMACH THAT FACT THAT THE GIRL I LOVE IS GONE. EVERY MINUTE I MISS HER, EVERYTHING ABOUT HER AND I DON'T KNOW HOW TO LET GO. I FELL IN LOVE WITH HER THE MINUTE I LOOKED INTO HER EYES AND THE FEELING HASN'T FADED. PART OF ME WANTS TO CALL HER AND GET HER BACK WHILE THE OTHER PART KNOWS THAT WILL ONLY HURT ME EVEN MORE. MY HEAD IS TELLIN ME TO LET GO WHILE ME HEART ACHES FOR THE GIRL I FEEL I WAS PUT ON THIS EARTH TO BE WITH. WHAT CAN I DO?

 

 

THANKS FOR LISTENIN

[CantDecide...]

dude i feel your pain to the T...my girl and i were dating for 2 years, and we were amazing together best friends , hung out 24/7, had amazing times, fights ocasionally but the usual stuff. Now her and i broke up 2 months ago and ive been going throuhg hell and back. her and i talk a lot and hang out a lot but its so on and off. like last week her and i spent everday together. this week shes very wierd, not as close, and just seems really diferent, and thats how it goes for me right now. Im having a horrible time saying to myself is it over or is there any more chances. the best advice i can give to you is just let her come to you. let her make the contact which i think your doing. if its ment to be you to will be together just keep telling yourself that. i know how hard it is i want nothing more then to get her back, ive been trying so hard not so hard that she notices but little things and, now im kinda playing the waiting game. so yea were in the same boat my friend just keep your chin up. and rember what i said if its ment to be you will be together.

[flsgirl]

Well first off, you can't help the way you feel so it's completely normal to feel horrible right now. As for what your suppose to do, you got it right the first time: NO CONTACT! The more you IM, text, call, e-mail or whatever, the longer it's going to take you to heal. It also gives you a false sense of hope that you will get back together. You have to be the strong one when it comes to that. The girl is going to keep calling It's going to create more drama. It's going to make things worse. More than likely even if you did get back together it would be an unhealthy relationship. It's pretty rare that once relationships end that those two will happily get back together.

 

Remember that you were fine before you met her and you'll be fine without her. Both of you seem pretty co-dependant on each other. That's not good (even though that's easy to slip in to). It's just going to take time to heal. Keep busy. Be with friends, try new things. Focus on what's good for YOU! You are going to be sad for a while, but grieving is the best thing you can do right now. Get it all out of your system (just don't do it for a long period of time).

 

Good luck

[shmeilz14]

First off I would like to say thanks to those who responded to my sob story... I know it was hard to make it through. Your advice and support will definetly help me in overcoming this.

 

However now more than ever I have this urge to call her. I was listening to the radio this morning and someone was playing a church wedding song. This isn't the first song thats reminded me of her but the difference between this song and all the others was the fact that I have such a loving memory of her singing it at all weddings we went to together. (She's a singer.. does weddings, sunday masses, funerals, concerts everything) She would sing the song, ask me how it sounded, and I of course would tell her she had the most beautiful voice in the world. And today when I heard it I was brought right back to that place, and it just made me flat out cry.

 

All I want to do right now is pick up the phone and tell her I was thinkin of her after I heard that song. I also want to just talk to her normally, see what shes been up to, when shes goin back to school, etc.. First if I call and she doesn't answer and I leave a message, I'll be upset if she doesn't get back to me. Second if I call and can somehow manage to have a conversation not concerning us I'm afraid she'll start to see me as a friend, which I am not interested in being in the first place.

 

So I guess my question would be.. Is it alright to call her and tell her I was thinkin of her bc of that song, or should I just suck it up and let the pain subside?

 

Any advice would be greatly be appreciated

[JS17]

It sounds to me like you really both love each other. It's too soon for a friendship so I would say no, do not call her. And, you're not over her if you want to call her when you hear a song that reminds you of her. By calling her, you will only be setting yourself up for disappointment.

 

You are both very young. If I had to guess what she is thinking, she probably loves you more than you can imagine but feels that she needs to grow as a person and experience life without you. She needs to know that she can stand on her own two feet and live a life that SHE wants and is proud of. She may eventually realize that you are part of that life that she wants, she may not but she won't know until she tries.

 

I have a coworker that had a crush on this guy in high school. Eventually when he broke up with his gf she went out with him. She decided in/after college that she needed to be on her own and experience life and she broke his heart. A few years later they got back together again. They've been happily married for about 5 years. I can't say that I believe this is completely common but it can happen. Some people know that they can't grow if they're in a relationship with their current S.O..

[J dub]

Everytime you talk, its you who does the asking and her that does the answering (or crying)

 

Whenever you think youre getting back together, she turns her cheek and it hurts you all over again

 

When you DO talk, it makes you feel worse than you did when you hadnt spoke.

 

She was with another guy.

 

You take weeks off from eachother and then expect a couple of phone calls & talks to reconcile things.

 

Answer? Cut her off. No contact means NONE. Do not take her calls, do not fall for her traps of "you dont care and it hurts" crap -- its a ploy to get you to respond. Surely you should see THAT pattern by now.

 

When you have a significant time apart to think, at least say -- a month, THEN MAYBE you can consider talking. Although I highly suggest you stay away from her altogether until youre healed. She is indecisive and she knows what you want. If she wants you back, she'll seek you out and tell you that. Otherwise, you are being her doormat and her shoulder to cry on.

 

Save yourself the endless circle of agony you've gotten yourself in, and drop her like its hot. Its tough at first, but if you have to, change your phone # to prevent talking to her.

 

Obviously, now is not the right time for the two of you to be together.

[shmeilz14]

Thanks JS17

 

You're right. I am not even close to being over her. I can honestly say that this girl has my heart. Hearing her voice just makes me melt. No matter how much I try to act "fine" when I speak to her, I can't help but succumb to the pain of knowing shes not mine anymore. Sometimes I feel like I hate her for putting me through this, but the majority of the time I just miss her. I understand that sometimes a girl needs this and the best thing for me to do is get on with my life... but its hard to think of my life without her in it. She made everything that much more enjoyable and I will miss that forever. She wasn't just any other girl to me, she was my best friend. Someone who would do anything I asked or needed, and never ask for anything in return. Of course I was the same way. But looking back on our relationship, and hearing other people's stories I have only realized how unbelievable she actually was. I try to think of things that annoyed me about her, but truthfully there weren't many. I miss her smile, her laugh, her voice, her ability to drink more than me and then make fun of me because I was drunk (I know that sounds dumb but I do), her stubbornness, I miss it all. I only wish that someday I will be able to either look back on the time I had with her as a fond memory or a short chapter of our lives together.

 

I know this post may have made absolutely no sense, but maybe it will help anyone who feels this way.

 

I guess I just will hold back on calling her.

[shmeilz14]

J DUB

 

You're absolutely right man. So many people have told me that and I've had a hard time accepting it or even going through with the process of completely cutting her off. I doubt she'll ever call me again bc now I think shes serious, but who knows...

 

I'm gonna try to suck this pain up and no matter how bad I want to talk to her, I'll have to resist. Chances are I'll just get upset all oover again.

 

Why do I feel like such a girl? Man this sucks

[samski3409]

from the sound of it your situation couldn't be more like mine.!! i'm at the same point you're at right now.After the initial break up,i went through the exact same crap for months. up until a little over three weeks ago,when i finally could just not do it any longer,it hurt way to much to continue the same cycle. And i have to tell you it's been freaking tough.so many nights i just want to break down and call.i don't know,just to hear her voice or something,to keep that stupid hope alive i guess or just because i miss her like crazy. but i'm not going to do it.

 

I've got your back man! if i screw up and give into it.you'll be the first to know.then you can give me all kinds of sh*t and i'll do the same for you.

[J dub]

Originally posted by shmeilz14

 

Why do I feel like such a girl? Man this sucks

 

I resent that :b Just kidding. No but seriously, each day that passes it will get easier not to talk to her. If you feel like youre going to cave, come here and post what you want to say instead.

[upsetnhurt]

Going through the same emotions guys as it has been a month and half of no-contact with an ex who I dated for a year and a half and after the breakup went into an up and down three months of hot one day and the next she would pull away. It has been TOUGH to say the least yet I was reading an article about a pretty girl who was involved in a car accident with a drunk driver and unfortunately she was completely disfigured. Thank god she lived and can be with her family yet I started to think that our lives are not that bad, with or without our exs....Screw them! If they don't want to be with us, why are we fighting so hard to be with them......take a stand and move on. I wish the best for that young girl and will use her a motivation. Life isn't so bad guys.......we met our exs and we will meet many more woman who will touch us even more..........

[Rocko]

Originally posted by JS17

It sounds to me like you really both love each other. It's too soon for a friendship so I would say no, do not call her. And, you're not over her if you want to call her when you hear a song that reminds you of her. By calling her, you will only be setting yourself up for disappointment.

 

You are both very young. If I had to guess what she is thinking, she probably loves you more than you can imagine but feels that she needs to grow as a person and experience life without you. She needs to know that she can stand on her own two feet and live a life that SHE wants and is proud of. She may eventually realize that you are part of that life that she wants, she may not but she won't know until she tries.

 

I have a coworker that had a crush on this guy in high school. Eventually when he broke up with his gf she went out with him. She decided in/after college that she needed to be on her own and experience life and she broke his heart. A few years later they got back together again. They've been happily married for about 5 years. I can't say that I believe this is completely common but it can happen. Some people know that they can't grow if they're in a relationship with their current S.O..

 

QFT.

 

I'm in the same situation right now. I recommend focusing on other parts of your life for now (e.g. schoolwork if you're in college). I also recommend taking up exercising. I especially recommend walking, as it gives you the physical connection of "moving on." For me, moving on was just knowing that this is what she wants right now and I respect her decision.

 

EDIT : Note that each person's advice is based on their past experiences. So try to take all posts (mine too!) with a grain of salt

 

Refer to my post: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t68883/

[Ty]

gawd man.. thats a rough story. i feel for you, i really do. it does sound like you two really love each other.. better not call or pick up that phone until you've had some time to deal with all this. give it some time. do other things to keep your mind off of her.

[Candy Cane]

It's almost like tough love...like when dealing with an addict...some of these exes. It's like don't contact me unless and until...you get into treatment/are willing to enter into an adult relationship. Maybe it's like a test to see if we care enough to walk away from them if they continue to abuse the relationship.

 

I just wonder. I'm not saying I know anything. My ex is horrible to me and yet I still love him.

[shmeilz14]

Once again I would like to thank everyone who posted a reply to my story. Somehow knowing that I'm not the only one dealing with this is a little therapeutic. So thank you everyone.

 

On the other hand I talked to her today. She called me yesterday and left a text message and I didn't get it until today. It said "call me when u get a chance." After thinking about if and what I should send back I decided to say "Call me when u get a chance, I guess we only get to talk on ur terms." A minute later she called me and I was ready to act like my heart wasn't aching for her anymore but.... she told me that her mom had an operation to remove a cancerous malignant tumor on her forehead and that the surgery didn't go as well as expected.

 

My ex was adopted by her mom who has taken care of her since she was a week old. Her mom is a 70 year old woman and is basically all the family my ex has.

 

My ex is extremely good at handling things but her mom means the world to her. As soon as i heard that the bitterness I was feeling disappeared. She told me she was sorry she bothered me but she just needed someone to talk to. I told her this is not what I would even consider bothering to me. She cried and I tried to calm her down as best I could. She said sorry I don't mean to do this to you and I just told her that I am here if she ever needs me.

 

We talked about what else we have been up to and as much as I wanted to say lets meet up and talk, I restrained. I just let her know that she can always count on me to be there for her. I know that sounds dumb considering what I've felt like since we broke up but its the truth. I love this girl and as hurt as I am that I'm not with her, I still care about her with all my heart. We talked for like a half hour and then said I love you and goodbye.

 

Now I'm definetly not trying to turn into a friend but in this situation.. how could I ever think about myself?

 

Anyway tonight she told me that shes gonna be bartending with a friend of hers at a place my friends are goin to tonight. Does anyone think I should go or should I just go somewhere else and save myself the inevitable feeling like someone punched me in the stomach? It seems like an easy decision but I almost want to see her and show her that I can be fine not being with her.

[Beentheredonethat]

I have been reading through the posts, and I must say that I feel like there are alot of really nice, helpful and caring people on this forum. I think that I am also a nice person, but the fact that I can be anonymous means that I can also be very truthful and blunt. Having been through what you have been through, I knew that you would end up talking with her. Indeed I believe that I can predict the course of this relationship. You and your Ex will continue to cycle through this pattern. Eventually though she will do something which will hurt you enough to the point where anger will outweigh your love for her, and make you realize that she IS NOT IN LOVE WITH YOU. In my opinion that is the distillation of this thread is that your EX is simply not in love with you. The fact that you are in love with her makes it impossible for you to let go at this time. Love is a powerful emotion, but sometimes anger can be helpful too.

 

I sincerely wish you the best, and say that it is better to have loved and lost then never loved at all. At your age (unlike me) it is very very likely you will love again.

[shmeilz14]

How does someone go from being your best friend and lover to a memory in such a short time?

 

Right now all I want to do is call her and ask her how this happened and why it happened and why we aren't together anymore.

 

I know its not a good idea but I almost just want to hear the sound of her voice. How she just turned me off like I was nothing after a year and a half has killed me. How does someone go from saying your perfect for them to not even calling me. So many times I find myself just wondering where she is and what shes doing. But the saddest thing is knowing that shes not thinkin about me.

 

Part of me feels that i've done nothing since the break up to get her back and that now I want to make a push at getting her back. I feel like I've almost realized that this girl is all I want and that I'm going to try to do anything in my power to get her back.

 

I think she knows how I feel, but I won't be absolutely sure until I give her that phone call to try to get her back. I've never begged or pleaded with her, I've respected her decision from the start, but now all I want to do is win her heart back.

 

Does anyone think its possible for me to make this happen and make her realize how great we were together?

[NiCoLe20]

ive been in this type of situation before and the only thing you can do to make her realize how much she loves you, is to let her go.

 

i know its hard and it sucks. but its something you have to do.

 

"If you love someone set them free, if they come back its meant to be." i swear, i live by this quote! ive been in many relationships and if things arent working out, i leave them alone, and establish the no contact rule. if they dont come in contact with me within 3 months, then you werent meant to be together. she has to spend time AWAY from you, and not talking to you, in order for her to miss you and the memories you had. trust me i know how this works.

 

dont answer her at all. if she texts you say something like this, "hey- im hurting right now b/c of all this thats happening...in order for me to get strong and accept that you dont want to work things out at the moment, i cant talk to you for a while..." say something like that. she probably will get pissed b/c u dont want to talk to her. good- thats the point. she will get over it and then realize that ur upset and that you WANT to workt hings out. she will already know this, so its up to her to make the next step. if she does, then everything will be ok... good luck and keep us posted!

[Rocko]

ive been in this type of situation before and the only thing you can do to make her realize how much she loves you, is to let her go.

 

i know its hard and it sucks. but its something you have to do.

 

"If you love someone set them free, if they come back its meant to be." i swear, i live by this quote! ive been in many relationships and if things arent working out, i leave them alone, and establish the no contact rule. if they dont come in contact with me within 3 months, then you werent meant to be together. she has to spend time AWAY from you, and not talking to you, in order for her to miss you and the memories you had. trust me i know how this works.

 

dont answer her at all. if she texts you say something like this, "hey- im hurting right now b/c of all this thats happening...in order for me to get strong and accept that you dont want to work things out at the moment, i cant talk to you for a while..." say something like that. she probably will get pissed b/c u dont want to talk to her. good- thats the point. she will get over it and then realize that ur upset and that you WANT to workt hings out. she will already know this, so its up to her to make the next step. if she does, then everything will be ok... good luck and keep us posted!

 

Amazing Advice, follow it down to the letter!

[shmeilz14]

Thank you for the advice Nicole

 

Sooo I guess calling her right now and telling her that I want to be with her wouldn't be the best thing to do.

 

Theres a part of me that says, "ok its over its time to REALLY try to move on" and then theres another part of me that says "if your hurting this bad you have to let her know just how much she means to you and that you want more than anything to be with her" I feel like I almost gave up too easy. She even said I hardly did anything to get her back! But once again part of me feels that she KNOWS that I want to get back together.

 

Should I break the cycle of no contact and make a final push at getting her back or do I just say let her persue me if she wants to get back.

[NiCoLe20]

dont do anything until she calls or texts you. once she says something like 'hey whats up' then that where you text her something along of the lines i told you. tell her your hurt, u miss her and still love her but for u to get stronger and for you to move on, you cant talk to her b/c it hurts you... see what she says and then do the no contact thing... by letting her know that your hurt ALL the time, she knows she has you in the palm of her hand. whenshe knows this, then she can do what she wants b/c she knows in the back of her mind, that your there waiting for her... just follow my advice, its hard but its the only way to resolve it.

[shmeilz14]

I guess you can say I'm absolutely helpless. Every single day the first thing I think of when I wake up is her. She is on my mind all the time.. no matter what I'm doing. The pain never goes away, I'm having such a hard time knowing that we are going our separate ways. I can still picture her face when I would hold her and tell her I loved her and know that there was no one in the world who could make me any happier.

 

I know I sound like every other person on this forum saying my ex is the absolute best person in this world for me. But honestly she was, she had her moments that completely frustrated and drove me crazy... but everyone does. I just still can't believe that I'm not with this girl. I try to list the things that that drove me crazy but honestly the list is so small that its almost not fair to write it. What kind of hypocrit would I be if I said, "she got annoying when she drank."Or she preferred to watch Buffy over Sportscenter. HA what girl doesn't.

 

I'd much rather list the good things about her. How she would call me in the morning just to tell me to have a wonderful day and that she loved me. How she would make me laugh when I was mad at her. How she knew me so well that she could tell something was wrong when I was quiet for a minute. God the list is endless.

 

How can I let go of someone who I really feel was the absolute best woman in the world. She was my baby and I miss her so much. My heart has hurt since the day we broke up and I don't know what I can do to fix it.

 

I feel like I will never get over her. I don't call or text her unless she texts me but I want to so bad. I need to tell her that she still means the world to me.. but I'm afraid she'll still need her time.

 

I wouldn't wish this type of heartache on my worst enemy.

[Rocko]

It seems like she really cares about you, but is just confused and perhaps wants to be single for now. Try to end it on the most optimal note you can, and give her space and time. Work on yourself (Work Out, Meet New People, etc.) and then consider your options in the future.

 

I'm in a similar situation, and am doing just that. Good luck, and keep us posted. Vent here if you are feeling low, but don't go telling her anything. If you do talk to her, remain genuine and friendly, but do not give her the affection you wish to give her so much. She needs to realize for herself if she loves you or not.

 

Nicole's advice is really good.