I wrote a poem for my gf what do you think?

[Dazedandlost]

I found a love

It has grown into true love

Something Extraordinary yet different

Her name is Jourdan

and there's so much I love about her

From her eyes to her toes

From her highs to her lows

Its probably Her laugh

because she's become my better half

Its the way her hand fits in mine

From God it must be a sign

Some days she doesn't know what she means to me

but one day I hope to carve our initials in a tree

all I see in her is forever

Cause I feel so special when were together

I hope she gives us a fresh start

cause she will forever and always be my sweetheart

 

 

 

 

 

 

Is there anything you would add or change to make it more special or better?

Edited December 22, 2017 by Dazedandlost

[fred123]

never do that or send that. she will laugh with her fri3nds.

 

guys dont do stuff like that for a reason. be a man and act like one.!!

if u wanna get dumped then send it.

only time u write a girl a poem is on your 50 year wedding anniversary! thats the rules

[BaileyB]

never do that or send that. she will laugh with her fri3nds.

 

guys dont do stuff like that for a reason. be a man and act like one.!!

if u wanna get dumped then send it.

only time u write a girl a poem is on your 50 year wedding anniversary! thats the rules

 

That's not the rules. With all due respect, why are you being so disrespectful to this young man.

 

OP, you should share your poem with your girl. If it's from your heart, she will love it.

[CautiouslyOptimistic]

That's not the rules. With all due respect, why are you being so disrespectful to this young man.

 

OP, you should share your poem with your girl. If it's from your heart, she will love it.

 

Agree. Don't listen to negative people, OP. I think it's very sweet.

[LoverOfDance]

@fred123 I'm sorry that a girl has treated you so badly that you have such a big fear of rejection and of being vulnerable. Very sad to be honest.

 

OP, it's a beautiful poem. Personally, I would prefer something with less rhymes. But the gesture seems genuine and sweet. I think she'll love it.