RecentChange Posted December 19, 2017 Posted December 19, 2017 Waaaait you are both old enough to have kids? When I first be read this I figured he had to be a wet behind the ears 22 year old with zero tact. But I see is a grown ass man. Hum, I am pretty kinky, and I speak openly about sex, but THIS after a first date? I would find it pretty disrespectful and a sign he would really push boundaries for his own gain. Did you have any prior discussion that would lead him to believe you were down to make video porn with him? For me, that would require really knowing someone and trusting them completely - no F'ing way I would let some guy I just met film me naked (and do god knows what with that video). For me, it would be a NO. 1
rightondude Posted December 19, 2017 Posted December 19, 2017 did you guys get naked while fooling around or was it just "heavy petting" ... depending on how "flirty" things were, this is either a real perv or he's just pushing things forward from where you guys left them. FWIW I've never texted anything close to that even with women I've been with.
Maggie4 Posted December 19, 2017 Posted December 19, 2017 Oh so you were texting about children and suddenly he writes that? Eww! See now I want to know what YOU wrote right before he wrote his message. I have the feeling you're naughty.
Space Ritual Posted December 19, 2017 Posted December 19, 2017 Went on a first date with a guy yesterday who appeared to be normal, fun, I had a great time with him. There was definitely some sexual tension there throughout the night and we ended up fooling around a little bit but didn’t have sex. He’s been texting me today and there was one in particular that caught me off guard... he texted “I wanna make a vid of you giving me head babe.” Is this something I should run away from now or should I wait it out- perhaps he’s just showing he’s a little kinky and not a big deal? I answered saying I was camera shy and would prefer to enjoy it just between us without the camera and he answered “ok babe.” So he didn’t push... WTF? lol. Yes that's a bit hasty on the guy's part. I am a cretin of the lowest order but even I am not soliciting Streaming hummers via text after a first date... Have some respect for yourself. This is one that is liable to film you without you knowing it and you'll end up on Pornhub and some potential suitor will come up to you and tell you he liked your skills on camera, and could he get a casting call out of you... seriously..run screaming into the night. 4
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted December 19, 2017 Posted December 19, 2017 Without reading other responses, it sounds like you came off as rather kinky on your date (did you give him a BJ?) for him to be bold enough to say that. 1
act00 Posted December 19, 2017 Posted December 19, 2017 There was sexual tension on the first date, possibly some really great groping and makeout session on that date, and probably "naughty talk" in your texting with him, so he tossed out a zinger. This might be his fantasy and maybe he wants this as a reality. I've met with guys on OLD who are after fetishes, and they just need someone willing to do it, who is on the same page. I have met men through OLD, where the sex talk came pretty fast, and I understand putting everything out there on the table and finding someone suitable, but really it turns out to be "seeking long-term" is seeking a roll in the hay. I would call this a deal-breaker. 2
Author Lexxi Posted December 19, 2017 Author Posted December 19, 2017 I certainly wasn’t a “victim”, yes, things got a little kinky and we did go down on each other. Prior to all that though, when we were at the sports bar, this is when we had “normal” conversation. I know you will all say that I should expect that, given what I allowed to happen last night but I’ve never been asked to film anything. He was telling me how much he enjoyed it and asked if I did and he went right to the text of saying he’d like to “video me giving him head so he can watch it when we’re not together”. I’m definitely not down for that, and there was never any conversation about a video prior to that so I was just taken aback and got a bit turned off. Just wondering if that can happen due to hormones, just trying to talk kinky to see what I would say, or if he’s really serious. I’ll probably step back. I got carried away last night, my mistake...
Negan Posted December 19, 2017 Posted December 19, 2017 I certainly wasn’t a “victim”, yes, things got a little kinky and we did go down on each other. Prior to all that though, when we were at the sports bar, this is when we had “normal” conversation. I know you will all say that I should expect that, given what I allowed to happen last night but I’ve never been asked to film anything. He was telling me how much he enjoyed it and asked if I did and he went right to the text of saying he’d like to “video me giving him head so he can watch it when we’re not together”. I’m definitely not down for that, and there was never any conversation about a video prior to that so I was just taken aback and got a bit turned off. Just wondering if that can happen due to hormones, just trying to talk kinky to see what I would say, or if he’s really serious. I’ll probably step back. I got carried away last night, my mistake... Don't apologize for your sexual activity, you have no one to answer to. You are however making excuses for him. Regardless of what you did that night, that request shows his motive with you in a way. It is actually disrespecting you. You are a piece of meat to him. Just saying facts are if you ever decide to go down that road with his request, it will wind up on the internet at some point or he will show it to someone else. 4
jjgitties Posted December 19, 2017 Posted December 19, 2017 Heis going to be showing it to other guys. Of that I can guarantee you. It's a trophy conquest thing. 6
ZoeGirl Posted December 19, 2017 Posted December 19, 2017 Um, yea...definitely a deal breaker in my book of taboos.
LivingWaterPlease Posted December 19, 2017 Posted December 19, 2017 Yes, deal breaker. I would also need to get off of the phone at that moment. 1
todreaminblue Posted December 19, 2017 Posted December 19, 2017 I certainly wasn’t a “victim”, yes, things got a little kinky and we did go down on each other. Prior to all that though, when we were at the sports bar, this is when we had “normal” conversation. I know you will all say that I should expect that, given what I allowed to happen last night but I’ve never been asked to film anything. He was telling me how much he enjoyed it and asked if I did and he went right to the text of saying he’d like to “video me giving him head so he can watch it when we’re not together”. I’m definitely not down for that, and there was never any conversation about a video prior to that so I was just taken aback and got a bit turned off. Just wondering if that can happen due to hormones, just trying to talk kinky to see what I would say, or if he’s really serious. I’ll probably step back. I got carried away last night, my mistake... i wouldnt trust the guy to say what he said and if he wasnt joking who is to say he wouldnt film you anyway without permission on the sly...he is a risk .....cameras can be so small...you wouldnt know.....deb.. 6
Sara1989 Posted December 19, 2017 Posted December 19, 2017 Yeah that would be a huge turn off and a red flag he was only seeing you for one thing. He thinks he got you in the bag so to speak for sex and is pushing you for more (porn videos) he thinks your type woman up for that type of thing...eee yeah next. 1
kendahke Posted December 19, 2017 Posted December 19, 2017 I certainly wasn’t a “victim”, yes, things got a little kinky and we did go down on each other. Oh, it was never my conclusion that you were a victim. This is what I was getting at with my question. What about the flirty texts, do you think, would put something like this on his mind about you? It would seem, by your flirting, that he's got the idea that you're game for this kind of stuff, which is why I asked exactly what you said to one another. No behavior happens in a vacuum. This wasn't a bolt out of the blue remark. There was a prologue that you participated in. He drew what he thought was a logical conclusion that based on his experience of you. I'd advise to begin thinking longer down the road when it comes to the actions you decide to engage in because they may have a different outcome that you've not given yourself time to consider through. And I'd still run because I wouldn't don't know how badly he wants a video of someone fellating him and what he will do to get it and where that video would wind up. 3
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted December 19, 2017 Posted December 19, 2017 I certainly wasn’t a “victim”, yes, things got a little kinky and we did go down on each other. Prior to all that though, when we were at the sports bar, this is when we had “normal” conversation. I know you will all say that I should expect that, given what I allowed to happen last night but I’ve never been asked to film anything. He was telling me how much he enjoyed it and asked if I did and he went right to the text of saying he’d like to “video me giving him head so he can watch it when we’re not together”. I’m definitely not down for that, and there was never any conversation about a video prior to that so I was just taken aback and got a bit turned off. Just wondering if that can happen due to hormones, just trying to talk kinky to see what I would say, or if he’s really serious. I’ll probably step back. I got carried away last night, my mistake... I think I'd have just said "keep dreaming, buddy, his because I'll never do that." It's possible he was just sharing a fantasy and his mouth got ahead of his brain. But, yeah, wise to take a step back.
d0nnivain Posted December 19, 2017 Posted December 19, 2017 I would have one foot out the door but before I bolted I'd talk to him face to face & ask why he said that & confirm that he's OK not doing it. It would also ratchet up my distrust meter; I'd be paranoid that he would hid a camera somewhere & film me without my permission. So even if I didn't run away I think the statement would eventually poison the relationship. 3
Els Posted December 19, 2017 Posted December 19, 2017 First date??? C'mon, girl. I'm kinky myself and I'd still run for the hills... Being kinky and having some respect/common sense are not mutually exclusive. 8
Author Lexxi Posted December 19, 2017 Author Posted December 19, 2017 Yeah, definitely nexting this one. He just asked me if I was seeing anyone, I told him no. And he told me he is seeing someone from time to time but she’s “meh” (his words), and said if it was anything g good, he wouldn’t be going anywhere else. I asked “so do you have a girlfriend?” And he said “nooooo, far from a gf”. The fact a guy could just talk about a girl like that... I wouldn’t want him talking about me that way. And who’s to say the poor girl doesn’t think it’s something more and he’s trying to downplay it? I haven’t responded, and I won’t. Sad cause this is the first guy in so long that I had fun with until he came out with hat text, and now this. Yuck. 1
Space Ritual Posted December 19, 2017 Posted December 19, 2017 I certainly wasn’t a “victim”, yes, things got a little kinky and we did go down on each other. Prior to all that though, when we were at the sports bar, this is when we had “normal” conversation. I know you will all say that I should expect that, given what I allowed to happen last night but I’ve never been asked to film anything. He was telling me how much he enjoyed it and asked if I did and he went right to the text of saying he’d like to “video me giving him head so he can watch it when we’re not together”. I’m definitely not down for that, and there was never any conversation about a video prior to that so I was just taken aback and got a bit turned off. Just wondering if that can happen due to hormones, just trying to talk kinky to see what I would say, or if he’s really serious. I’ll probably step back. I got carried away last night, my mistake... Thank you for the additional information. It gives your original post far more sense. I was having a hard time reconciling a "makeout" progressing into an invitation for a video Oral Interpretive. That wasn't making sense until you elaborated I can tell you he probably has told his buddies an embellished tale of you sucking the chrome off a trailer hitch. His invitation for video would be going straight to his buddies at the bar and/or online. no 2 ways about it. Believe me he won't be seeking a long term relationship. for him to make the progression to video after one date of mutual oral he sees you purely as a sexual conquest and will probably dump you once he has had a few rolls in the hay. Sorry to say that, but again, he seems failry predictable. We guys aren't exactly a mystery surrounded in an enigma and wrapped in a riddle....in fact we are about as predictable as a clock or a morning poop. In his mind, you are worthy of him getting elbowed by his buddies and congratulated on his good fortune and asked if you are a Pass Around Type. Maybe they will give you a nickname of Turbo Tongue or some other insulting moniker. Unless you want a boatload of out of the blue Friend requests on FB or Follows on Twitter, I suggest you dial all this back with Cecil B. DeMille Sorry to sound like I am crude...well I basically am crude, and there really is no way to sugarcoat it.. I am no diplomat but I am fairy certain this guy is not above board and only interested in you on a short term basis. The request on his part was a dead giveaway. 2
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted December 19, 2017 Posted December 19, 2017 Yeah, definitely nexting this one. He just asked me if I was seeing anyone, I told him no. And he told me he is seeing someone from time to time but she’s “meh” (his words), and said if it was anything g good, he wouldn’t be going anywhere else. I asked “so do you have a girlfriend?” And he said “nooooo, far from a gf”. The fact a guy could just talk about a girl like that... I wouldn’t want him talking about me that way. And who’s to say the poor girl doesn’t think it’s something more and he’s trying to downplay it? I haven’t responded, and I won’t. Sad cause this is the first guy in so long that I had fun with until he came out with hat text, and now this. Yuck. Yeah...."are you seeing anyone" is a question that should have happened before the first date! This guy sounds like he's only after one thing. Sorry it didn't work out . Next time, only kissing (on the mouth) on the first date . 1
PhillyLibertyBelle Posted December 19, 2017 Posted December 19, 2017 Wowza! There is nothing here but yuck! Run away and fast! 1
Author Lexxi Posted December 19, 2017 Author Posted December 19, 2017 So I still haven’t responded to his last text and he just texted me “U believe me right?” Do I just continue to ignore him or should I just come out and let him know that I’d rather just not share guys with other women? I know we owe each other nothing but I’m not looking to be involved in any drama and be just a second, third, fourth, etc option. Should I just tell him, and if so, how to word it correctly? Or just leave it as is?
smackie9 Posted December 19, 2017 Posted December 19, 2017 It's very possible the text was meant for someone else....delete/block anyways.
Author Lexxi Posted December 19, 2017 Author Posted December 19, 2017 It's very possible the text was meant for someone else....delete/block anyways. I think the text was just a follow up to his other text indicating he does not have a girlfriend. And I didn’t respond so he probably just wanted some type of confirmation I believed what he said.
Recommended Posts