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if a guy said this to you, would it be a dealbreaker?


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Posted

Went on a first date with a guy yesterday who appeared to be normal, fun, I had a great time with him. There was definitely some sexual tension there throughout the night and we ended up fooling around a little bit but didn’t have sex.

 

He’s been texting me today and there was one in particular that caught me off guard... he texted “I wanna make a vid of you giving me head babe.” Is this something I should run away from now or should I wait it out- perhaps he’s just showing he’s a little kinky and not a big deal? I answered saying I was camera shy and would prefer to enjoy it just between us without the camera and he answered “ok babe.” So he didn’t push...

Posted

My personal opinion: I would run.

  • Like 13
Posted
Went on a first date with a guy yesterday who appeared to be normal, fun, I had a great time with him. There was definitely some sexual tension there throughout the night and we ended up fooling around a little bit but didn’t have sex.

 

He’s been texting me today and there was one in particular that caught me off guard... he texted “I wanna make a vid of you giving me head babe.” Is this something I should run away from now or should I wait it out- perhaps he’s just showing he’s a little kinky and not a big deal? I answered saying I was camera shy and would prefer to enjoy it just between us without the camera and he answered “ok babe.” So he didn’t push...

 

It's up to you if it's a deal breaker or not. Just reading what you wrote, you can definitely tell what direction he wants this dating situation to go in. All sexual. Do you have any other meaningful conversations?

Posted

Um def run away. If he easily said this to you so soon, i bet he is saying it to dozens more.

  • Like 6
Posted

Seems like it's a wee bit early to be talking about making porn videos together.

  • Like 17
Posted
Went on a first date with a guy yesterday who appeared to be normal, fun, I had a great time with him. There was definitely some sexual tension there throughout the night and we ended up fooling around a little bit but didn’t have sex.

 

He’s been texting me today and there was one in particular that caught me off guard... he texted “I wanna make a vid of you giving me head babe.” Is this something I should run away from now or should I wait it out- perhaps he’s just showing he’s a little kinky and not a big deal? I answered saying I was camera shy and would prefer to enjoy it just between us without the camera and he answered “ok babe.” So he didn’t push...

 

Totally inappropriate comment to make after one date... I would be running for the hills. But then again, there will never be any sex videos in my future... Just not going to happen, for any man.

  • Like 8
Posted

I get a feeling you might wind up on one of those bad naughty internet pr0n sites.

  • Like 10
  • Author
Posted
It's up to you if it's a deal breaker or not. Just reading what you wrote, you can definitely tell what direction he wants this dating situation to go in. All sexual. Do you have any other meaningful conversations?

 

We talked about sports, friends, told funny stories about things hat happened in he past, our kids. He shared pictures of his son. And yes, we flirted a lot and I was extremely attracted to him. But this text was just odd. I was thinking maybe some guys will say this playfully just to see what the girl will say, was trying to make excuses for him I guess.

Posted
I get a feeling you might wind up on one of those bad naughty internet pr0n sites.

 

That would be my fear and for far too many trusting souls, the sad reality...

  • Like 2
Posted
Went on a first date with a guy yesterday who appeared to be normal, fun, I had a great time with him. There was definitely some sexual tension there throughout the night and we ended up fooling around a little bit but didn’t have sex.

 

He’s been texting me today and there was one in particular that caught me off guard... he texted “I wanna make a vid of you giving me head babe.” Is this something I should run away from now or .

 

That would completely turn me off. Right after the first date and he's wanting to make a sex video?

 

I'd be running, screaming, from him as fast as my legs will carry me.

  • Like 12
Posted
We talked about sports, friends, told funny stories about things hat happened in he past, our kids. He shared pictures of his son. And yes, we flirted a lot and I was extremely attracted to him. But this text was just odd. I was thinking maybe some guys will say this playfully just to see what the girl will say, was trying to make excuses for him I guess.

 

Still though, you don't know each other well enough at this point which makes his comment very socially inappropriate. He is definitely testing your boundaries.

  • Like 1
Posted

That's his best foot forward? It sounds more like an audition for his personal porn flick. I'm guessing that he might have a file of old 'friends' somewhere on his computer or phone....

  • Like 6
Posted
We talked about sports, friends, told funny stories about things hat happened in he past, our kids. He shared pictures of his son. And yes, we flirted a lot and I was extremely attracted to him. But this text was just odd.

 

What about the flirty texts, do you think, would put something like this on his mind about you?

 

I was thinking maybe some guys will say this playfully just to see what the girl will say, was trying to make excuses for him I guess.

 

Not after having seen one another for just one time. There is a time and place for this--like once you two have decided that you're taking things in a sexual direction. It would seem, by your flirting, that he's got the idea that you're game for this kind of stuff, which is why I asked exactly what you said to one another. Sports, friends, funny stories about the past and children generally aren't topics of conversation that leads one to the next (logical?) step of saying he wants to take a video of you fellating him.

Posted

I don't think I've ever had someone say something like that to me unless we'd already done IT, and you said you hadn't done IT yet. Do you want to do that with him? Remember you don't know this person at all. I think you are well within the infatuation stage right now and powered by the hormones that are making you horny, which can make you irrational.

Posted

After one date? That's gross and really inappropriate.

  • Like 5
Posted
We talked about sports, friends, told funny stories about things hat happened in he past, our kids. He shared pictures of his son. And yes, we flirted a lot and I was extremely attracted to him. But this text was just odd. I was thinking maybe some guys will say this playfully just to see what the girl will say, was trying to make excuses for him I guess.

 

Yeah, don't make excuses for someone you barely know. Do you want this guy around your kids?

  • Like 5
Posted
We talked about sports, friends, told funny stories about things hat happened in he past, our kids. He shared pictures of his son. And yes, we flirted a lot and I was extremely attracted to him. But this text was just odd. I was thinking maybe some guys will say this playfully just to see what the girl will say, was trying to make excuses for him I guess.

 

 

Yeah I don't know. I guess depends how flirty and kinky your conversations were. Still seems a little extreme for someone you only just met. What else does this classy guy have up his sleeve?

Posted

A bit crass, and I'd never do that. However, maybe that is the type of vibe he got from you. Kinky stuff.

Posted

Not a deal breaker for me but I would definitely be honest up front and tell him, if it happens, it won't be for a long time. If thats something you don't mind doing, just make sure you trust him before you allow any sort of pics or videos to end up on his phone.

Posted

If by "fooling around a little bit" you mean you already gave him head, then no, his comment isn't that inappropriate. He's just saying he wants to film what you've already done. If you want to avoid comments and situations like that then don't blow the guy on the first date.

 

If you mean something way less then that, then yes, he's being a little forward and weird.

  • Like 3
Posted
Yeah, don't make excuses for someone you barely know. Do you want this guy around your kids?

 

A very good point.

  • Like 2
Posted

Also wanted to add, if its after just one date, I WOULD take that to assume he's only looking for a fun time. In which case i most likely would say... next.

  • Like 1
Posted (edited)

its not playful..i know you want to make excuses....but i suggest get out fast......and for me i would say something like ....is that meant as a joke.....if it is a joke you arent funny......i have to be honest either way,joke or not a joke.... I am not the girl for you and i wish you well.....deb

Edited by todreaminblue
  • Like 3
Posted (edited)

Wow! After the first date he gets right to the point. He wants to make a porn movie with you. Next him fast! Why do you even have to ask? This guy does not respect you.

Edited by stillafool
  • Like 3
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