20 year hook up

[LoverOfDance]

So I'm watching this show about these people who have been sleeping together for 20 years. They eventually married other people.

 

My focus is not on the fact that they are having an affair. I'm more concerned about why they didn't just marry each other. I don't get it. If they like each other enough to be sleeping together for years, why didn't they just get together and actually date? I think there are many people like this. Why do people keep hooking up for years (not on and off but steady) but never get together? Just curious.

[central]

Well, my long term FWB wasn't suitable for a relationship, but was a good friend and lover. Perhaps it's just about having a safe and reliable sexual partner while you work on a career, or something. Then, they find someone who is compatible for marriage. It's not hard to see how this could work, IMO.

[LoverOfDance]

@central

 

I don't know, it seems to me like if they are hooking up steadily and not on and off, they must have feelings for each other. How do you not fall for someone you are constantly hooking up with? Are ppl really so emotionally detached when sleeping together?

[Eternal Sunshine]

I can see how it's possible. It's nice and comfortable to have a steady sexual partner while you are single. I had 2 long term FWBs. Both had dealbreakers when it came to being in a relationship. One just wasn't on my intellectual wavelength. I could only express about 10% of my thoughts to him, the rest he just didn't get - sex was great though. The other smoked pot and drank a lot every day. Not something I wanted to deal with but as a FWB it can be ignored.