essa Posted December 13, 2017 Posted December 13, 2017 It’s been over three months since my ex and I broke up (I broke up with him in June, we got back together almost immediately after, and then he broke up with me). We saw each other two months ago and have been talking ever since. The communication has been kinda on and off on my end as of late, since I have been writing exams for the past few weeks (I am away for school, so we were long distance when we were dating, but saw each other every weekend). I feel like the issues that led to our breakup are still prevalent. We broke up because I always felt secondary to his friends. I was also going through some medical things and began distancing myself, after feeling like he was choosing his friends over me at a time where I needed him the most. Towards the latter part of our relationship, we fought all the time about the friend issue, but I feel in a good place now that I have had time to be away from it and reflect on what matters. I think I would be willing to try and work on it, on my end. I think there is still something there based on our messaging (we reminisce about memories we had together, etc.) and I think I want to try and see if he would interested in giving it another chance to try and work through these issues. I have no idea if he’s seeing someone (he has not mentioned anything in our messages) or if he wants to. I have met other guys, but I still think about him all the time. When we broke up, we said how much we loved each other, but that the fighting was just too much. I do not know how to go about this or if its even the smartest idea. I miss him terribly and I feel like the love is still there. Any and all advice would be much appreciated!
marky00 Posted December 13, 2017 Posted December 13, 2017 general rule is the idea of a reconciliation has to come from the dumper. best to assume someone still believes in their original decision unless you get something on paper right in front of your face that something has changed. 1
bluecastle Posted December 13, 2017 Posted December 13, 2017 You should simply tell him how you feel. But before doing so it's best to have sorted out on your end what you think needs to change—otherwise, you'll just get a hit of comfort followed by another unraveling.
d0nnivain Posted December 13, 2017 Posted December 13, 2017 I feel like the issues that led to our breakup are still prevalent. Because the issues that broke you apart -- not once but twice -- still exist & have not been resolved, there is no point in trying a 3rd time. You already know this LDR doesn't work. Your present interactions are born of politeness & sentimentality, not a desire for reconciliation. At this time of year, especially since you will be home & near him again, you are falling back into old, familiar & comfortable patterns. It's easier to be with an EX even if just solely to not be alone then to do the scary thing & move forward into the unknown future. Yet, that is the best course.
Recommended Posts