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What does "In a complicated relationship" mean (social media)

whattodo77

By whattodo77
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whattodo77 Member

whattodo77

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Hi everyone, what would you interpret someone that had their relationship status as in a relationship with a particular person on their facebook profile then removing that person as in a relationship and having updated it as "in a complicated relationship" would you say the relationship is still going, as in they're together, or taking a break or broken up?

d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

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I'd interpret it as "taking a break", even though I hate that phrase & think it's meaningless. Here in the example you gave it's the best option because what I think "in a complicated relationship" means is that the poster still wants to be dating their EX & is working to win them back but the EX is trying to end things.

 

 

All in all the person who posted this is not available to date you, which is the only relevant metric.

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HumanMachine Established Member

HumanMachine

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It could mean anything.

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RecentChange Established Member

RecentChange

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I don't think you can generalize. I know people who use that designation that are in odd poly / open / not categorized relationships - hence complicated ;)

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whattodo77 Member

whattodo77

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I'd interpret it as "taking a break", even though I hate that phrase & think it's meaningless. Here in the example you gave it's the best option because what I think "in a complicated relationship" means is that the poster still wants to be dating their EX & is working to win them back but the EX is trying to end things.

 

 

All in all the person who posted this is not available to date you, which is the only relevant metric.

 

Thank you for this very helpful post. I think that you might be absolutely right with what you interpreted it to mean. The person who posted this particular "in a complicated relationship" status recently found out their partner had cheated on them, after finding this out, a couple of days later it went from in a relationship to complicated.

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whattodo77 Member

whattodo77

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I don't think you can generalize. I know people who use that designation that are in odd poly / open / not categorized relationships - hence complicated ;)

 

Interesting! Thanks for adding this to the mix as I hadn't thought of it in this way but does make perfect sense how it could be used for this!

ExpatInItaly Established Member

ExpatInItaly

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I would take it to mean that things are rocky and they are "on a break." Why anyone would want all of FB to know that, I am not sure.

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whattodo77 Member

whattodo77

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I would take it to mean that things are rocky and they are "on a break." Why anyone would want all of FB to know that, I am not sure.

 

I totally agree with you on this and not only that, making it public for the whole world to see, trying to make a statement perhaps?

Michelle ma Belle Established Member

Michelle ma Belle

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I too am one who thinks this could mean a millions things.

 

Although the response d0nnivain gave is one that I've seen as well and is indeed plausible, I've also known people to use that status as a way of keeping one foot in and one foot out of whatever relationship they're calling 'complicated'.

 

Basically they're alerting anyone viewing their profile that there is someone in the wings but for whatever reason it's difficult to cut ties with completely YET they're open to other possibilities with other people if it were to happen.

 

They are the ones to avoid at all cost.

 

Posting and especially switching their status to this should be and is a red flat in my humble opinion. I mean, what's the point of it all unless you're trying to either send a message or announce to people that you're somehow now 'somewhat' available.

 

I don't understand what motivates people to do what they do online.

Edited by Michelle ma Belle
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d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

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The person who posted this particular "in a complicated relationship" status recently found out their partner had cheated on them, after finding this out, a couple of days later it went from in a relationship to complicated.

 

 

 

Well, there you go. It's complicated because they had the proverbial rug pulled out from under them. They are heartbroken & upset but not enough to break up.

 

 

If you are the cheater, send flowers & a sincere apology. Do everything you can to be transparent.

 

 

If you are somebody who wants to date the victim, stay away. The person is not ready for a new relationship.

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snowboy91 Established Member

snowboy91

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I don't think you can generalize. I know people who use that designation that are in odd poly / open / not categorized relationships - hence complicated ;)

 

I think Facebook also has an "open relationship" designation as well. I always saw "complicated" as a relationship that is on again/off again for that person. Which could mean anything from they are chasing an ex who is no longer interested, to one or both are cheating, or anything. I used to see it relatively frequently, now not so much. Probably because my age group are starting to marry, or they know what they want and can break a relationship in a much cleaner fashion.

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PegNosePete Established Member

PegNosePete

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I would take it to mean "do not date this person unless you love drama".

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Popsicle Established Member

Popsicle

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Hi everyone, what would you interpret someone that had their relationship status as in a relationship with a particular person on their facebook profile then removing that person as in a relationship and having updated it as "in a complicated relationship" would you say the relationship is still going, as in they're together, or taking a break or broken up?

 

At the very least, it means they are NOT single. It basically means stay way from this person because they have a lot of drama. Unless of course you like drama....

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beatcuff Established Member

beatcuff

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means there is another person, to what extent -- you have to ask. they could be 'on a break', in an open relationship OR could also be reentering the dating scene and not sure they are ready: think just getting over a LTR/D or partner passed away.

 

they are being honest. a good start. if you are interested ask 'why is it complicated' then decide whether to move forward or look elsewhere.

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whattodo77 Member

whattodo77

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Thanks everyone for your replies, all very helpful and insightful.

CautiouslyOptimistic Established Member

CautiouslyOptimistic

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I usually think it means "we keep breaking up and getting back together."

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Fair Established Member

Fair

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Right. It means on again, off again. Probably because both parties are co-dependent, not getting along but too afraid to let go completely because they're afraid to be alone. You know, dysfunctional..

 

It also means you might as well keep your distance when they're on the "off again" cycle because it'll never be good between them, but it'll never be over.

 

I see this status on FB and always shake my head. It's like the person is announcing to the world that they are in in an effed up relationship.

 

What are thinking? That "it's complicated" sounds mysterious and chic? Bah. That's not how it sounds.

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edgygirl Established Member

edgygirl

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The guy I ended up marrying put it in our FB status back in 2008 although we were a real couple. He was sarcastic, creative, and it made sense for the LOLz.

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Jdoublenn Established Member

Jdoublenn

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I agree with others. It could be anything. I have a friend who keeps "its complicated" as her status even though she's in a monogamous relationship with a man she loves. I don't know her whole history, as our friendship is still fairly new, but it sounds like they've had issues in the past and she just leaves it that way.... *shrugs*

 

If I were to use that status it would feel like i'm telling the world "i have no idea whats going on with the guy" or "we have so many problems its not worth posting back and forth when we're together or broken up" LOL

 

I don't have any status posted for that reason. Ive been back and forth a couple times with my ex and at this point it feels silly to even post anything. after we broke up the last time I just deleted the whole section on my FB.

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