Sbla22 Posted December 7, 2017 Posted December 7, 2017 So after my last break up with a girl I went out with for 5 months I decided to take a good look at my life and start making improvements to make myself a more confident, well rounded person. I feel like this is going fairly well and one of the things I did was attend a 'Meetup' for the first time to broaden my social life. I decided that it was worth a try so at the weekend I went for some drinks for it and I thought to myself I'll have no expectations, just see what it's like and I ended up enjoying it and meeting a few different people. Anyway, there was a girl there who I took an instant liking to even though I said I'd have a little break from dating. We got on really well, she's sweet and fun. So the next day I tried to message her on the Meetup app but it wouldn't allow me. I tried finding her on social media but she doesn't show up. So I had one last idea to message someone else from the Meetup app that I knew this girl had spoken to a lot on the night (another girl) and asked if she got her contact number. So a few hours goes by and she messages back saying she was waiting for permission to give it to me and the girl I liked did indeed give me permission! (All sounds a bit high school! Haha we're both 26) On the night I met her we mentioned we both go to the same gym. So i text her asking if she wanted to go with me this week and she said yes. However she seems to take ages to text back (like 8 hours at a time!) We went tonight and I really enjoyed being with her, she's fun! So at the end of the night she said to let her know when I wanted to go the gym with her again and I said I would but also said 'we could also go for a drink some time too' and she smiled and said yeah then we said bye. I don't know how to take this situation. Should I A) leave the ball in her court now and not text her to test if she likes me as more than a friend B) text her soon asking to meet up again? I definitely don't want to come on too strong as I've learnt from experience it drives women away in the end.
Space Ritual Posted December 7, 2017 Posted December 7, 2017 Call her...don't text. It is difficult at best to decipher someone's actual tone through text. Much easier to decipher things by voice. I'd like to suggest something though. Don't ask her out for drinks yet. Get to know each other a bit through your physical activity and not over drinks. I say this for a couple of reasons. I am a recovering alcoholic with close to 25 years of sobriety under my belt. In my experience getting to become better acquainted over alcohol is leaving too much to chance. Maybe feel a little nervous so down some drinks? Maybe say something wrong, or offensive? Nah...take it slow and continue to see her at present at the gym or perhaps running together. In Wine there is truth, but in physical exertion you'll also find truth, without the hangover. 2
Author Sbla22 Posted December 7, 2017 Author Posted December 7, 2017 Should I call her soon? I don't know if she's into me or not - would giving her number to me (through someone else) and meeting me at the gym indicate friendship or more?
smackie9 Posted December 7, 2017 Posted December 7, 2017 Should I call her soon? I don't know if she's into me or not - would giving her number to me (through someone else) and meeting me at the gym indicate friendship or more? The way I see it, she's tired of waiting for you to step up to ask for her number so she gave it to said friend to give it to you......ask her out.
Space Ritual Posted December 8, 2017 Posted December 8, 2017 Should I call her soon? I don't know if she's into me or not - would giving her number to me (through someone else) and meeting me at the gym indicate friendship or more? Call her tomorrow and just take it slow and casual. The whole working out thing is a FANTASTIC intro to get to know someone better. Yes she wants you to call her.... Your move.
Author Sbla22 Posted December 9, 2017 Author Posted December 9, 2017 Update on this. Text her yesterday saying I enjoyed the work out and she had put me through my paces. She text back a few minutes later saying she enjoyed it too. An hour later (as I was working) I text asking how work was going for her today. She hasn't replied since and that was over 24 hours ago. I also know she's been on Whatsapp since. So sick and tired of this. Constantly getting dropped by girls - no idea why she gave me her number or came the gym only to disengage all communication? I know people will say 'you should ring her' but it's rubbish. It's so rude to just ignore someone.
kendahke Posted December 9, 2017 Posted December 9, 2017 I know people will say 'you should ring her' but it's rubbish. It's so rude to just ignore someone. But she doesn't owe you anything just because you have it in your head that because you like her, she's obligated to reciprocate on your level. You're not even dating. She doesn't even know you. That rubbish advice may have made the difference for her. Some people just don't text or they don't use texting as a means to conduct a protracted conversation they don't have the time to get into. To a lot of women, resorting to texting as a primary/principle mode of initial communication means you're not confident enough and that's a turn off.
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