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Why do girls get offended with me calling them bros?

barbossa

By barbossa,
in General Relationship Discussion

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barbossa

barbossa

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If we are just acquaintances or loose friends why do girls get offended at me calling them bros or dudes?

 

Are they just hyper sensitive?

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ExpatInItaly

ExpatInItaly

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Because "bro" and "dude" are typically masculine monikers. It is rather silly to address women this way, if they're women you have a romantic interest in.

 

Did you really not know this?

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KBarletta

KBarletta

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This is one of those questions where I feel like the answer is obvious - women should be addressed with female monikers and pronouns if they so choose. Would you call a male friend, "Gal" or "Babe" or "Chick"? No. Why would this be any different?

 

Here's a tip: Try to treat people with respect and use the names and pronouns and nicknames they choose and not the ones you deem appropriate and you'll find things might go a bit smoother.

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smackie9

smackie9

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Call them by their name or call them friend or girl. That seems reasonable.

 

One time my husband called me dude in a conversation. I almost lost it. I felt so disrespected. I understood it was a slip because this is how he talks to his buddies at work (all guys), and he was still in work mode. But that didn't make it feel better.

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barbossa

barbossa

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barbossa,

 

Why is it that you don't see anything wrong with it? Come on. :rolleyes:

 

If someone called me stud , [etc], I personally wouldn't get offended

 

I hardly or ever see girls calling each other sister, sis,

 

[]

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barbossa

barbossa

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Call them by their name or call them friend or girl. That seems reasonable.

 

One time my husband called me dude in a conversation. I almost lost it. I felt so disrespected. I understood it was a slip because this is how he talks to his buddies at work (all guys), and he was still in work mode. But that didn't make it feel better.

 

 

Such a small small thing can set you off?

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Gr8fuln2020

Gr8fuln2020

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If someone called me stud , [etc], I personally wouldn't get offended

 

I hardly or ever see girls calling each other sister, sis,

 

[]

 

I'm sorry, but are you male or female?

 

The girls who get offended are so b/c you are addressing them with a gender-inappropriate term. That's all. It really is that simple and really, oddly unnecessary. :)

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elaine567

elaine567

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Such a small small thing can set you off?

 

Of course.

It is all all about respect and calling a woman a man essentially is not showing respect nor is it flattering...

 

In essence "I am calling you dude or bro, because to me you look like a man..."

 

NO woman would really appreciate that.

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healing light

healing light

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I have a lot of guy friends. I would not be offended being called a bro. However, if I had a romantic interest in a guy, I would hope he'd only say that jokingly and not every time... because I would want him to see me as a woman/love interest, not just another bro. I would think that I was friend-zoned if he always referred to me as bro.

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William

William

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Let's stick with 'bro' and girls getting offended. Departing on a vulgar language excursion is a wonderful way to get one's posting privileges removed. No need for that. Carry on!

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basil67

basil67

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If someone called me stud , [etc], I personally wouldn't get offended

 

I hardly or ever see girls calling each other sister, sis,

 

 

Of course you wouldn't be offended by 'stud'. It's only ever used towards men and is a compliment.

 

Girls don't call each other sis because we use each other's names.

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todreaminblue

todreaminblue

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i am old school....i find the term....disrespectful to say to a woman or a girl and unappreciative in regards to femininity...deb

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thefooloftheyear

thefooloftheyear

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Women generally don't like that term "bro" anyway....[]....It's just not something women like hearing, even if you don't mean to be demeaning or disparaging...

 

Don't do it..

 

TFY

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RecentChange

RecentChange

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How are these girls showing their "offense"? How and why do you use those terms?

 

For ME, and my lexicon, and my social circle, "Bro" is kinda derogatory.

 

We have "dude bros" or "bro dudes" those are the obnoxious, loud, frat guy kinda idiots.

 

To use in a sentence:

"Oh man, we had to leave the bar, just full of bro dudes"

 

We have "Tech Bros", these are the often clueless, entitled, young tech set.

 

To use in a sentence:

Ugh, the train was a nightmare tonight, full of Tech Bros talking about how special their money is and bragging about their terrible start up ideas.

 

Basically - a "bro" is like a frat guy... all the annoying qualities of a frat guy, the kind of guy that would yell across the room "BRO!!! Are we going to go pull some chicks tonight or what?!"

 

Oh and "Brahs" yeah those are coastal / surfer bros. Equally obnoxious, but with a "hang loose" accent.

 

One may hear:

"Brah! Where the waves and women at!? Got some kind to smoke BRAH?"

 

So yeah, I would look at someone weird if that called me "bro".

 

Dude.... depends on the person, those may slip by. Some people use "dude" universally to address anyone (especially those surf brahs!)

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CautiouslyOptimistic

CautiouslyOptimistic

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I would have nothing in common with a man who called me "bro" or any variation of it. For starters, I would not be attracted to what I inferred about his IQ if he did so.

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RecentChange

RecentChange

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I would have nothing in common with a man who called me "bro" or any variation of it. For starters, I would not be attracted to what I inferred about his IQ if he did so.

 

Exactly. I find "Bro" and most men who use that type of lingo to have very unattractive personalities

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basil67

basil67

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Women generally don't like that term "bro" anyway....[]....It's just not something women like hearing, even if you don't mean to be demeaning or disparaging...

 

Don't do it..

 

TFY

 

Speaking of demeaning or disparaging, the word 'mate' is used here from one guy to another. When used as a term of friendship between male friends, it's not offensive at all. (It can be also used as an insult depending on inflection, hence me specifying 'a term of friendship')

 

But even when used with no negative connotations, it's very masculine and so nobody would call a woman 'mate'.

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