kendahke Posted December 7, 2017 Posted December 7, 2017 Well there is one exception I would make, and that is for widowers. Ooh, for me, that would be even worse because not only is he dealing with the perfect ghost of his deceased wife, the kids are dealing with not only the ghost of their deceased mother, but also the unspoken expectation that their father remain single indefinitely to honor her memory and their feelings, especially once they're of an age where they understand the permanence of death. I had a friend whose wife died about 8 years ago and to this day, he is still torn up about it. He is a complete emotional and physical mess; he self medicates through alcohol. He refuses to admit he's not even begun grieving for her. It didn't bother me that he would bring her up all the time, as we weren't romantic, but it did concern me because of the destructive ways in which he was numbing himself. Last time I saw my friend was a year ago on Christmas day. He left my house and has gone ghost--I don't even know if he's dead or alive. For whatever reason, he cannot bring himself to deal with her death.
Author Popsicle Posted December 8, 2017 Author Posted December 8, 2017 Ooh, for me, that would be even worse because not only is he dealing with the perfect ghost of his deceased wife, the kids are dealing with not only the ghost of their deceased mother, but also the unspoken expectation that their father remain single indefinitely to honor her memory and their feelings, especially once they're of an age where they understand the permanence of death. I had a friend whose wife died about 8 years ago and to this day, he is still torn up about it. He is a complete emotional and physical mess; he self medicates through alcohol. He refuses to admit he's not even begun grieving for her. It didn't bother me that he would bring her up all the time, as we weren't romantic, but it did concern me because of the destructive ways in which he was numbing himself. Last time I saw my friend was a year ago on Christmas day. He left my house and has gone ghost--I don't even know if he's dead or alive. For whatever reason, he cannot bring himself to deal with her death. Maybe he's lonely (romantically) and needs a girlfriend or wife. They say that men do better when they have a woman. He's probably scared to get with another woman because he thinks she may die too.
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