randzilla Posted November 12, 2017 Posted November 12, 2017 Ok so I posted a thread earlier on my relationship woes so I'll spare the details. So we're in a rough patch and doing no contact. But I am freaking out on the inside. What do y'all do to ease this. I'm fine one minute in a panic the next as a grown man I'm embarrassed. I keep this all to myself so she has no clue. As far as she knows I'm fine
Frostedflake Posted November 12, 2017 Posted November 12, 2017 The panic sucks. I had it during the beginning of my breakup. I'm very familiar with that momentary mental lapse where you're ready to pick up the phone or do something equally as stupid to make contact. The thing about feelings though.. they pass. Just like you can be triggered into a memory you can also be distracted away from them. Change what you're doing at that moment and go be productive. Start on a project you've been putting off, join a gym, do anything besides sitting on those thoughts or giving into the panic.
carhill Posted November 13, 2017 Posted November 13, 2017 Yup, accept the feelings as valid; don't fight them. Depending on your psychology, you may get flashes weeks, months, even years later and the key IME is to accept the feelings as part of who you are, process them them out and move on to the next batch of feelings. After awhile, I found myself laughing at some of the responses, meaning my own emotional responses. Laughter helps. Life is too serious to take seriously. Lighten up. Yeah I know we need to be serious sometimes. Doses. Good luck!
Darkchan Posted November 13, 2017 Posted November 13, 2017 I can relate, I have the same. I have panic attacks and bad anxiety. It's been a month tomorrow since I was dumped and also no contact. It's not easy. What I have been doing is spending time here, as soon as I feel panic spur up I write a post in my thread or in someones else thread. I think I spend on average 3-4 hours reading posts and writing post here a day. Another thing I do is writing in my diary on google drive (never had a diary before...) or call some of my friends living in another country and spend time on skype, I usually listen/watch while they work on something or when they play games as I can't really feel relaxed or calm, but this do distract me. So I think if you can and have some friends you trust. Ask them to hang out with you or just speak on the phone. Some suggestion I have gotten myself is also to exercise, go for a run or hit the gym. Which I find quite difficult at the moment as I used to do a lot of exercise with my ex, but the concept seems to be useful for many. I also felt embarrassed about panic and anxious attacks, even though I'm a grown woman. But in reality, regardless of you gender or age everyone experience similar feeling and issues when heartbroken. That's something you will find by just reading other stories in this forum. So you are not alone, it hurts, it will take time. I myself just paniced 10 mins ago and are now hanging out here and is expecting a skype call any minute now!
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