GrUmPy1 Posted August 19, 2005 Posted August 19, 2005 a few days ago my boyfriend jokingly brought up something that really hurt me in the past. i got upset and tried to leave his house. he would block my way out and grabb me and wouldnt let me go so i hit him in the balls,frustrated i tried to walk away and then he pushed me. he has never hit me but this is the second time he pushed me. it wasnt super hard but he still pushed me so i broke up with him. i thought about it all day and since i had hit him too and have before i said ok im going to apologize and then he will and all will be good but oh boy was it not. he couldnt apologize without adding i didnt do it that hard anyway or you hit me first. so that hurt me and i said forget it. all day he didnt call me. he was saying he loved me and all that but he didnt pick up a phone. so then that nite i called him crying telling him that i miss him and wanted him over my house( we live right next door to each other) just to hold me and he said well you know i have to get up for work in alittle bit. does that sound like someone who misses someone and wants their relationship back?? oh ya and that same day he was supposedly so heart broken yet he went with his friends to his brothers house to burn some dvds. now this is a very emotional guy and all of a sudden he isnt shedding one tear or making one phone call to me. day 2. he still didnt call all day. the only time we talked was when he seen me outside smoking and even then he wouldnt say much. all he would say is i love u but it didnt sound sincere. then he would talk to me like if HE was mad at ME. he would say dont end this dont do this and i told him you did it not me and he would say no ur the one that broke us up. its been four days and he hasnt picked me flowers, wrote me a poem, letter ANYTHING. he seems really really irritated with me and its like he doesnt want me back. he says he does and that he still loves me but he isnt showing it which is really wierd because in the begining of our relationship he was always a cryer and full of emotion. is he over me>? did he just get tired of me? am i wrong to want atleast a little gesture to prove he still loves me. i dont know what to do. it seem by his non chalant attitude that i loved him more than he loved me.
Merin Posted August 19, 2005 Posted August 19, 2005 Well IMO the first mistake he made was in not allowing you to leave.. My guess is he didn't want you to go on a bad note but regardless the best thing he could've done was to allow you to leave if thats what you wanted... That said... YOU hitting him was WRONG. While he shouldn't be pushing you, you also shouldn't be putting yourself in a place to be hit BACK and IMO you put yourself in that place when you hit him (regardless of where it was) Next.. you said you were sorry... I'm curious did you ALSO add a BUT to the apology? Like maybe "Sorry I hit you BUT you wouldn't let me leave?" again.. sorry is only sincere without a BUT and/or an excuse for why you behaved in a bad manner. Now it seems you're wanting this Guy to cry his ass off and beg for forgiveness... and I could be way wrong here, but if I had to guess there have been more than one or two occassions in the relationship where you felt he was wrong and didn't accept a sorry at value but made him suffer and work to get back in good graces... while wanting someone to show you they are regretful for mistakes or wrongs done to you is all okay and good to go, IMO it isn't okay to expect someone to grovel and knock themselves out especially when both parties (you and him) are BOTH in the wrong. Your wanting him to prove to you that he loves you and again while that may be okay, you also need to step back and look... have you given 110% to show him that you also love him and want to resolve the problem...
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