basil67 Posted November 8, 2017 Share Posted November 8, 2017 The Final Word is right when he suggests digging further into the relationship. Though I see a different kind of digging. Thing is, good relationships need compatible approaches to life. This isn't about who's right and who's wrong, it's about how well you match. Crucially, her feelings on the matter are of equal importance to yours. Just as you would like her to reconsider her stance for your sake, I'm sure she'd like you to reconsider your stance for her sake. Put a bit of thought into whether this is a hill to die on. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted November 8, 2017 Share Posted November 8, 2017 I worked ladies nights....and let me tell ya, the drawing class is pretty tame compared to what I have seen. In Canada the G-sting came off and oops there's a full 13" I didn't one BF complain about me working those nights. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
RecentChange Posted November 8, 2017 Share Posted November 8, 2017 I wonder where the line is drawn? No nude male art models in the same room.... But what about watching porn? Or is that okay because it's on a screen and not standing 10 feet away? Is it okay of they aren't attractive physically? Or? I think one thing men forget is that women aren't as visually motivated as men. I have never just LOOKED at a male figure and became aroused, I need interaction, flirting etc. It's also why porn doesn't do that much for me, and as a whole isn't nearly as popular with women as it so for men. Nude painting? Sure you can observe his body, but I doubt that there would be anything risque going on. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted November 8, 2017 Share Posted November 8, 2017 I couldn't care less....rock out with your cock, er...vag.. out, I guess... I think the issue with the strip club vs this thing, while valid, may not be thought of the same way, mostly because I think most people just expect a different type of behavior of the typical woman out there vs the typical man, with regard to this type of stuff... Not that women aren't supposed to be sexual, just these types of things aren't really activities most women would be interested in doing, IME, anyway.. TFY. Link to post Share on other sites
SpecialJ Posted November 8, 2017 Share Posted November 8, 2017 I once dated an artist, for a long time. He'd go to sketch classes with naked models, explaining it wasn't sexual (and he's a very sexual person). I wasn't sure how to feel until I saw his drawings. Really, models of all shapes and sizes, nothing sexy about it. If they're going to giggle, I agree with the other posters. It doesn't reflect much aside from immaturity... and honestly, some discomfort with doing anything more risqué. This is going to be a safe environment with no touching. Have you spoken to her about it yet? Not in a controlling out judgemental way, just in a hey, I want open communication and want to share with you that I feel weird about this way. Personally, if a significant other said that to me, it wouldn't stop me from attending, but I'd try to talk to him about it and explain my motives aren't sketchy (pun intended!) to put him at ease. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted November 8, 2017 Share Posted November 8, 2017 hmmm I would say the model matters more than the place. What do you think is more likely? An average guy with bit of belly and average package as the model, or a hunk with a 6 pack packing some heat. Because OP has posted and vanished without answering some questions that are really needed in order to give an informed decision, we'll never know the details of what is going on here. And so what if he's a hunk and is packing heat? That means his girlfriend is going to forget that she's in a relationship and smash dude on the spot? Why is OP dating someone so stupid? Like I've asked in two separate posts--is she the kind of chick that gets drunk and embarrasses herself and everyone else in a 5 mile radius? Or is this a one-off and she's grown and she doesn't need "daddy's" permission to attend this--because he is talking about forbidding a grown woman from doing something that is harmless and that will go further towards ending their flimsy relationship than her sketching a guy with a fantastic body for an hour. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Michelle ma Belle Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 I couldn't care less....rock out with your cock, er...vag.. out, I guess... I think the issue with the strip club vs this thing, while valid, may not be thought of the same way, mostly because I think most people just expect a different type of behavior of the typical woman out there vs the typical man, with regard to this type of stuff... Not that women aren't supposed to be sexual, just these types of things aren't really activities most women would be interested in doing, IME, anyway.. TFY. You obviously haven't seen how women behave at a male strip club The OP should be thrilled this is as crazy as they're getting. And let's remember, this is a hen party not your average Saturday night out with the girlies. And even if it was, I still don't see any problem with it but whatever. Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 OP, if you think this is inappropriate you really need to work on your issues of insecurity. I suspect there's other issues in this relationship. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
coolheadal Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 Hi, My girlfriend has just said she's going to a life drawing class with friends for a hen party to draw a naked man. This obviously makes me uncomfortable and I think it's inappropriate. Is it? Should she be going? Listen to her wishes. Do not try too intervene! Because if you do you'll loose your girl friend. Let her be, let her choose what she wants to do. That's proper way to live today. We men might not like everything they do, but just remember the choice you make might not be the right choice in the end. Thus letting her do this you seem better in her eyes and mind. Shows to her your okay with this and you trust her too. Got have trust today. No trust no relationship! Link to post Share on other sites
Poutrew Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 If this were a regular art class, I'd tell you to not worry. But, this is a hen party. At a regular art class, there is no touching. At the hen party, that's all that will be going on. It will be a bunch of drunk, Horney women egging each other on to do more than the last one. An old college buddy broke up with his then girlfriend because she came down with a bad case of oral herpes after going to a party featuring nude models in a similar circumstance - each girl put the thing in their mouth as a drunk dare, and 3 of them got the herpes for their efforts... it was many years ago, but I still remember the pure hell the guy went through waiting to see if he was going to break out with herpes next... I smile when I hear all the females on this board get so bent out of shape over this as a trust issue. I say you can only trust yourself and God when your health and future are concerned. Everyone else gets the third degree. Link to post Share on other sites
PhilHarper Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 My first thought is it depends on the girl. I've dated girls where I'd be cool with them going because I totally trust them and their character based on what i'd seen from them. I think it could be a cool experience, or fun for a girls night out. On the flipside I've dated a girl where I would not be comfortable if she went because I'd be thinking it would influence her somehow or she'd bring it up in a disrespectful way or constantly talk about it without considering how it would make me feel. I didnt trust her and wasn't fond of her character. So I think you gotta consider the individual and how they'd handle it. How much you trust them. Link to post Share on other sites
Justanaverageguy Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 (edited) Britain and cultures that descended from it - USA, Australia, New Zealand etc etc all tend to have very very VERY weird unbalanced views on nudity. The culture ultra sexualizes nudity - and yet is simultaneously very conservative about it. A bizarre contradiction which makes nudity some massive taboo. Showing a nipple in public like breast feeding is for some reason a massive issue and worthy of significant debate on whether it should be allowed. The culture has completely broken it's relationship with our natural form and thus you get this bizarre behaviour of nudity being trotted out on hens nights and bucks party's like little children peaking behind the curtain at something naughty. People freak out at any form of nudity because of the way the culture has skewed peoples views. Its just plain bizarre. Move to Western Europe - they have a much more balanced view of nudity. Its not even a big deal. Sure they are still attracted to the nude form but in a balanced way. It hasn't been ultra sexualized and they have learnt how to respond to it in an appropriate way instead of like 6 year old children. You go to mixed saunas and everyone is naked and its not big thing. People swim at the lakes naked and nobody cares. They tend not to care or have strippers for bucks and hens party because nudity just doesn't really register as anything special. Its not this bizarre voyeuristic jaunt that you get in former British colonies. When you take away the "forbidden" factor - people stop caring. Nudity is only a big deal ..... if you make it a big deal. Edited November 9, 2017 by Justanaverageguy 2 Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 You obviously haven't seen how women behave at a male strip club The OP should be thrilled this is as crazy as they're getting. And let's remember, this is a hen party not your average Saturday night out with the girlies. And even if it was, I still don't see any problem with it but whatever. I worked them years ago, we hosted those parties in the club I worked at......I know all too well......And the older the raunchier.. But lets face it.....Female strippers/performers outnumber male strippers by probably thousands to one...It happens, but I wouldn't exactly call it common... I don't see any problem with it either, but I guess some might.... TFY Link to post Share on other sites
Cobra_X Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 Hi, My girlfriend has just said she's going to a life drawing class with friends for a hen party to draw a naked man. This obviously makes me uncomfortable and I think it's inappropriate. Is it? Should she be going? Ok, it makes you uncomfortable. What can you do about it? It's the exact same thing as you going to a strip club. Would she have a problem with that? If she does then you have a double standard and some hypocrisy to deal with and I would let my feelings be very clear. Link to post Share on other sites
Cobra_X Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 And so what if he's a hunk and is packing heat? That means his girlfriend is going to forget that she's in a relationship and smash dude on the spot? Why is OP dating someone so stupid? Well... if she did do that... how would OP ever know? Because 90% chance if she wants to cheat this guy would be down for it and never talk. Being the Gatekeepers to sex is a very big responsibility. People inherently understand that those who are in such a position of power can easily abuse it. So he has a full right to be uncomfortable with most hen party activities. Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 https://www.henswithpens.com/ - it all looks pretty tame. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Cobra_X Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 https://www.henswithpens.com/ - it all looks pretty tame. What is the appeal? It just looks like a way to hit up a strip club while pretending to do something artsy. Link to post Share on other sites
coolheadal Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 (edited) Britain and cultures that descended from it - USA, Australia, New Zealand etc etc all tend to have very very VERY weird unbalanced views on nudity. The culture ultra sexualizes nudity - and yet is simultaneously very conservative about it. A bizarre contradiction which makes nudity some massive taboo. Showing a nipple in public like breast feeding is for some reason a massive issue and worthy of significant debate on whether it should be allowed. The culture has completely broken it's relationship with our natural form and thus you get this bizarre behaviour of nudity being trotted out on hens nights and bucks party's like little children peaking behind the curtain at something naughty. People freak out at any form of nudity because of the way the culture has skewed peoples views. Its just plain bizarre. Move to Western Europe - they have a much more balanced view of nudity. Its not even a big deal. Sure they are still attracted to the nude form but in a balanced way. It hasn't been ultra sexualized and they have learnt how to respond to it in an appropriate way instead of like 6 year old children. You go to mixed saunas and everyone is naked and its not big thing. People swim at the lakes naked and nobody cares. They tend not to care or have strippers for bucks and hens party because nudity just doesn't really register as anything special. Its not this bizarre voyeuristic jaunt that you get in former British colonies. When you take away the "forbidden" factor - people stop caring. Nudity is only a big deal ..... if you make it a big deal. In the USA we are shy to nudity (US Government rules it to be unjustified for young kids to watch on TV or through commercials. Others countries like UK they show it all. We here would say "OMG! other countries would think it's normal)In the past bra commercials wouldn't even show a woman partly naken she had to wear top ontop of the bra, now it's not like that. They did try nudity here in prime-time on TV but something happen and it's no being shown blurred. We just have to assume she naked LOL Although some common rules are changing you can see two women kissing each other. Never happen years ago. Rules are changing.. We here in the USA just not ready to see nudity on OTA, but CATV yep it's okay there. Edited November 9, 2017 by coolheadal Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 What is the appeal? It just looks like a way to hit up a strip club while pretending to do something artsy. If you host this "class" at home, the drinks are cheaper, you get all the "benefits" without having strangers around & you don't have to risk being seen going into one of those places. The model probably just looks like a guy going to the apartment. Again, OP, if you feel that strongly discuss it with your GF. I agree that on balance to look / draw for this unique special occasion, the hen party, it doesn't seem all that bad. If you actually think the model is going to service all the attendees you best check your level of paranoia & lack of trust for the woman you are currently dating. Link to post Share on other sites
snowboy91 Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 Of course she should go. It's a hens party - it's just a bit of fun, and I don't see it being as bad as going to a strip club. It's appreciation of a fine human of the opposite sex, without any sexual element whatsoever. (as others have said, there are nude figures in museums, cathedrals etc... this really isn't all that different) My GF organised a river cruise with male strippers for her sister's hens. The reason I had no problem with it? Trust. She was open with it the entire time, and there was nothing about how she acted about it that would suggest there was something to hide. I agree with the others, OP you need to discuss how you feel - I hope she will reassure you that everything is going to be fine. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
GunslingerRoland Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 I don't really see the issue, sorry. But then again, my wife has gone for girls nights, to male strippers before too, and I didn't see the issue with that either... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Robert Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 Thread closed. Looks like the thread starter was not interested in the feedback. ~6 Link to post Share on other sites
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