Tonetta1995 Posted November 7, 2017 Posted November 7, 2017 I used to get stressed with my ex, and I would yell, And at my mom etc, I hate myself for it. I won't do it again, but she said she's had enough and doesn't want to be with me, and said "Of course I want you in my life, but you have to accept we're friends now". I'm giving her NC without even telling her, Just disappearing, It'll go one of two ways. She'll get sick of me not saying anything, and block me. OR Less likely but my preferred option: She realizes that she misses me and wants me in her life as her boyfriend. I feel like such ****.
d0nnivain Posted November 7, 2017 Posted November 7, 2017 Yelling at people you love -- your EX & your mom -- is not productive. Using NC to manipulate somebody to coming back is not healthy. Lying & saying you are friends (even though everybody tells that lie during a BU) but then ghosting is not a sign of friendship. Being silent doesn't fix the problems that caused your BU. You broke up because of your stress & yelling. Until you fix that you will not be able to maintain a healthy fulfilling relationship. 3
Author Tonetta1995 Posted November 7, 2017 Author Posted November 7, 2017 Yelling at people you love -- your EX & your mom -- is not productive. Using NC to manipulate somebody to coming back is not healthy. Lying & saying you are friends (even though everybody tells that lie during a BU) but then ghosting is not a sign of friendship. Being silent doesn't fix the problems that caused your BU. You broke up because of your stress & yelling. Until you fix that you will not be able to maintain a healthy fulfilling relationship. I hear that, I don't do the NC to manipulate her, More to give her a break from me for a while, so I can work on my problems. And I didn't lie and want her to be my friend, she wanted that. I don't want to be her friend.
HumanMachine Posted November 7, 2017 Posted November 7, 2017 I hear that, I don't do the NC to manipulate her, More to give her a break from me for a while, so I can work on my problems. And I didn't lie and want her to be my friend, she wanted that. I don't want to be her friend. She’s made it quite clear how she sees you. You need to work on your own issues for yourself, not her - she is done.
Been Posted November 8, 2017 Posted November 8, 2017 When you have to resort to games in order for someone to take you back then it becomes tedious. Its no longer a healthy relationship. Your waiting around for her return. And she knows it. And that plays a huge part in decisions. Think about it: she knows your on stand by. She plays the field and doesn't like or see anything she likes. Or maybe she gets burnt. And first thing when something doesn't workout for someone is they usually run back to something familiar- which is you. Want to really get her attention??? LIVE your life. Do things for yourself. Improve yourself. Stop waiting around for something that might or might not come back. Stop BEGGING for someone to want to be with you. You have to act like she never existed and I know its hard but all this speculation about what's she is doing or how you might get her to comeback is going to eventually eat away at you. And if she did decide to comeback what have you done in her absence? NOTHING. Meanwhile she more then likely going forward and you've put your life on pause.
Been Posted November 8, 2017 Posted November 8, 2017 And the whole friends thing is BS. What are you going to hang out with her when she has a new boyfriend? And how would that go? Can you imagine her introducing you to her new boyfriend? It wouldn't go well. You can't be friends right now. And for her to suggest that shows me she is shallow.
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