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Post second date?


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Posted

I went on a second date with a guy last night. We went for dinner and drinks then we ended up back at his. He had made a cake that I had mentioned in one of our text conversations which was really sweet. We didn't sleep together but did make out etc. During the evening he did mention doing things together again but nothing certain. The next morning wasn't awkward was quite chilled, we were both quite tired. I text him a little while ago and got a reply but it wasn't leading on to meeting again. What do I do?! I have another second date with another guy on Wednesday but would prefer to see this guy again... do I ask him out?

Posted

Frankly, I would date the other guy to see if he is more promising. Don't fret. If the first guy is really that interested, he will contact you. How does it hurt seeing this other guy unless you are not willing to give the second guy any chance at all.

 

Really. The first guy may be preparing for another date with some other girl. No need to feel obligated to do anything more with the second guy, so you lose nothing by seeing him.

Posted

Go ahead and go out with this other guy on Wednesday. For this first guy, give him a chance to organize himself. Maybe he's playing it cool, maybe there's another woman he plans to see, maybe he doesn't know what his plans and schedule are yet. Be patient.

Posted
do I ask him out?

I would say go for it. He has planned and presumably paid for the first 2 dates. He may figure that it's your turn now.

 

Besides what's the worst that could happen?

Posted

A lot of things tend to sort themselves out if you just do nothing and let it all unfold in its own time. I am trying to tell myself that :)

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Posted

So I sent a message asking if he wanted to meet again - he hasn't read it yet but I think he's probably ignoring it. Just have a feeling he's been put off maybe 'did too much' on a second date. Dunno.

 

But feel a bit better after sending the message - at least I'll know either way. Had a horrible feeling all day.

  • 2 weeks later...
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Posted

So I ended up asking him out again for a 3rd date... again we had a really good time, seemed like he was in to me. I stayed over - didn't sleep together as it was time of the month. I feel like he suggested doing things again in the future during the date. Next morning was nice, chilled, watched Tv. Saying goodbye he had his arms around me and said send me a text later, and that he would send me a photo from his business trip later on in the week.

 

So I sent a message later on that day, he replied but then didn't reply to my reply. I text again the next day and he replied strait away...but he's not asking me out. He's not asking me a lot really. I know he's busy with work. He had been online I've seen his happn account had been active.

 

I think I know the answer... if he's interested he will message right? I just feel very anxious about it all. And can't stop thinking about why he hasn't messaged.

Posted

Are you the only one that initiates texts? Is he not a texter? Does he call?

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Posted

He replies, pretty much instantly... and in detail...

but he's not initiating stuff

 

I know he's got a lot on at work and is doing a massive project and is away...

So I get that.

 

I also know he's not a massive serial dater. We have chatted about that.

 

Even when we initially first met his texting was sporadic...

 

Just feel like I'm getting mixed messages...

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