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Posted

I wonder if she's ever going to get over the 2015 New Year's Eve party. At some point most of us got drunk. A guy (my now bf) asked me for a dance.

 

I can't explain why this happened. I said loudly with a disgusted look that I don't dance with Indians, made a complete fiasco and several of my friends were escorting me out. The next morning I was told that the guy's mother was there and she heard everything. She was staring at me and at the whole scene for a long while before talking in private to her son.

 

It's been a while since we made up. We've now been dating for 5 months. He assumed his mother was over it and introduced me to her in August. She wasn't very welcoming and hardly smiled. After the introduction, he admitted she wasn't over it and is upset that we're dating.

 

Is she ever going to get over it?

Posted

Have you apologized to her personally?

 

You made a loud discriminatory comment in front of a group of people, slighting this woman's son based purely on his ethnicity, no less. I don't think this is on her to just "get over."

  • Like 6
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Posted

No, I haven't yet. She has fb though.

Posted

How can you blame her or expect anything less?? You insulted her(and her son!)

 

Additionally, it may even more than that...That culture(not unlike many others to varying degree), from my experience, likes their offspring to marry/date within their own kind...

 

You need to personally apologize...Forget the FB message, call her on the phone and discuss it..or set up a meeting and see if you can clear the air..

 

TFY

  • Like 3
Posted

Don't do anything at all....she knows you won't be around for very long. Any person who would say what you said, get drunk enough to get thrown out, and would consider...um FB as a way to make amends won't be around for long.

 

Consider sobriety, putting devices away and doing some volunteer work. :)

  • Like 3
Posted

You must give a sincere apology to her face. NOT via Facebook. And do not blame alcohol for your behaviour.

  • Like 2
Posted

Be prepared that she might not forgive or approve. I certainly wouldn't! What is this guy thinking?

Posted (edited)
You must give a sincere apology to her face. NOT via Facebook. And do not blame alcohol for your behaviour.

 

Agree.

 

Has it really not occurred to you to apologize to this woman?

Edited by CautiouslyOptimistic
  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted

I'm awared of my stupidity that day and she'll always have that bad impression. Honestly, I feel lucky he gave me a second chance. I know we shouldn't even be friends after what I did, much less be in a relationship.

 

 

The truth is we love each other and want to continue the relationship. Today, he was upset because of terrible things his mother has been telling about me nonstoppable all day long to her friends and a couple relatives. What upset him the most is when his mother began telling how she missed his ex gf, how she's smarter (she's in law school) than any ''drunkard, racist, bimbo''. She went on explaining that if I come, she'll fake it for his sake, that I'm nothing but trouble, how I'll never be good for him, etc.

 

Honestly, I've stopped drinking like that.

 

I will apologize to her on our next meeting. I hope we can one day get pass this.

  • Author
Posted
Agree.

 

Has it really not occurred to you to apologize to this woman?

I will on the next meeting. I hope we can one day get along.

 

I was never a racist. I had friends of every type of ethnic groups.

Posted
I will on the next meeting. I hope we can one day get along.

 

I was never a racist. I had friends of every type of ethnic groups.

 

You're the one who mentioned the word 'racist'. And I think it was absolutely racist. I mean, drunk or not, where does a comment like that come from? :sick:

  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted
You're the one who mentioned the word 'racist'. And I think it was absolutely racist. I mean, drunk or not, where does a comment like that come from? :sick:
I mentioned it because that's what his mother told him about me yesterday.

I was out of character that day (I know, no excuse) and as mentioned, haven't been drinking like that ever since.

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