Outcast Posted August 20, 2005 Posted August 20, 2005 It's inside and controlled by our genes, Send along some credible anthropological studies that prove this. Or try to. You'll find that, contrary to your claim, there are quite a few matriarchal societies where the women are the chief breadwinners and rulers of the household - to this very day. The men basically contribute sperm and go do the grunt work. I find it absolutely fascinating how some men and some women assume their preferences are universal and then go further to attribute these preferences on genetics when in reality it happens to be just something they prefer.
Gold Pile Posted August 20, 2005 Posted August 20, 2005 Originally posted by battleworn of mine once justified this kind of behaviour by saying that women aren't necessarily attracted to money itself, but to the kind of man who is driven to succeed. So money is just a score. I said, uh huh and rolled my eyes. . I think she was speaking the truth. It's the person's qualities that make him/her aquire wealth. Appealing qualities to many. Some just want money, now matter how ya got it...ol gold pile is banking on them....but that's another story.
Gold Pile Posted August 20, 2005 Posted August 20, 2005 Originally posted by Star Gazer I'm going to be brutally honest. I didn't even read 1/2 of your post, because I knew what the problem was right away... It's not about money. It's about your height and weight. wow!, you're kind of a bitch, but I likes ya anyway! This fall you and I should hop into my fancy car and go leaf peeping in New England. I know a charming motel up there, it's in a 1959 time warp...Charming! I'd love to show it to you. Kiss Kiss from your future temporary guy friend.
MySugaree Posted August 20, 2005 Posted August 20, 2005 For the last couple months I've been dating online. Curious about the income factor, I've experimented. For 2 weeks I disclosed my annual income range, and for 2 weeks I removed all income information. During the income disclosure period I received approximately 15 winks and emails from the ladies. During the income blackout period the emails and winks declined by more than half. Does income matter? Absolutely. But then, so do many other attributes and assets. Not all women are gold diggers; not all men are players. That's what makes the mating game so unpredictable and so much fun.
Art_Critic Posted August 20, 2005 Posted August 20, 2005 Originally posted by MySugaree For the last couple months I've been dating online. Curious about the income factor, I've experimented. For 2 weeks I disclosed my annual income range, and for 2 weeks I removed all income information. During the income disclosure period I received approximately 15 winks and emails from the ladies. During the income blackout period the emails and winks declined by more than half. Does income matter? Absolutely. But then, so do many other attributes and assets. Not all women are gold diggers; not all men are players. That's what makes the mating game so unpredictable and so much fun. I've done the same test and had the same results... For a couple of months I never put my income because I didn't want someone to contact me based on that.. But it is a big selling point on online dating One of the issues I have is how much to put down for income.. on match the highest you have is 150,000+.. I've thought about pulling in down a notch or 2 to see if the winks increase more or decrease. But then the issues that comes into play at that point is honesty.. Will they think I'm being modest or dishonest when they find out I make more than I said I did?
RecordProducer Posted August 20, 2005 Posted August 20, 2005 Originally posted by Art_Critic Will they think I'm being modest or dishonest when they find out I make more than I said I did? They will be delighted!!! If my guy lied to me about his income (said he earns less than in reality) I wouldn't mind. I would understand that he wanted a woman to love him for himself, not for his money. So that kind of lie is acceptable and after all it's good news! As a matter of fact, I wouldn't want to know right away that a guy has a lot of money, because he might think that I am after his money. However, if somebody lied he makes more money than he does, I would be very upset. I wouldn't dump him, but that I would consider as an indicator of dishonesty as a character trait. But I wouldn't advise you to pretend that you're unsuccessful whatsoever, Art. We really are attracted by the type of guy who is able to make good money. I would prefer a big entrepreneur who just lost all his money and is in debt than a schmuck who is not capable of earning, but just won 10 million on lottery.
MySugaree Posted August 20, 2005 Posted August 20, 2005 Will they think I'm being modest or dishonest when they find out I make more than I said I did? Most likely, they will tell you you're being prudent. I've been on 3 Match dates (coffee only) and all the women advised me to remove my income information to ward off the female money barracudas swimming in the great cyber-ocean. These women share a dark view of the motives of their Match sisters. When they complained of male dishonesty it usually concerned guys fudging their age, weight or marital status. I suspect a modest understatement of high income would be very low on their list of Match gripes.
Art_Critic Posted August 20, 2005 Posted August 20, 2005 Thanks RP !! and MySugeree !! I think I will be more modest then..
RecordProducer Posted August 20, 2005 Posted August 20, 2005 You're welcome, Art. The best way is to put that you're financially secure or have fulfilled your profesional goals. It's double sensed and might mean anything from $50 k to a million a year. Don't state figures about your income. It's really nobody's business. It's more serious to NOT state your salary, IMHO. I've been in a LDR with my BF for almost a year and I still don't know how much he earns. And I don't care. If you need any tips for the dating sites, feel free to PM me.
Outcast Posted August 20, 2005 Posted August 20, 2005 You can avoid the income section altogether if you put in a few details that indicate you are reliably employed or in some way convey that you are not a chronically unemployed or unambitious person. While some women are after money, others are wary of ending up with a ne'er-do-well who'll take bread out of their babies' mouths. As long as it's clear you're fending for yourself and managing well, you should have fewer money-grubbers to worry about.
Author battleworn Posted August 20, 2005 Author Posted August 20, 2005 I'm leaving the income in. But I'll be wary. I do get more than a few mails from outright scam artists (e.g. model photo plus appeal to send her money after bf abandoned her in Africa). When they see my car and house, they'll be less impressed. Most of my income goes back into investments or my company. Occasional big ticket items like a home theater but that's it. The house is more of a learning project until I get a bigger place. If they run when they see me drive up in a VW I'll know it wasn't true love
JS17 Posted August 20, 2005 Posted August 20, 2005 this is kind of just a general statement but i've noticed that a bunch of guys on this site seem to be really hung up on the thought that women are really really into money. i can't say i know one woman that would date someone solely for their money. i think outcast had it right that many women want to know that they're not going out with an unambitious slug and don't care about the size of the wallet. i think if you really love your job, whether you make money or not, it will be more appealing to a woman than if you worked some job just for the money or worse, didn't have any desire to work at all.
Outcast Posted August 20, 2005 Posted August 20, 2005 And by 'ambitious' I really meant nothing other than wanting to manage well enough on one's own. I'm all for balance so someone (male or female) who is obsessed with becoming a top exec or high-end politician or whatever is a whole other order of issues. I didn't mean 'ambitious' in that way.
clandestinidad Posted August 20, 2005 Posted August 20, 2005 I agree w/ that outcast!! The thought of dating a surgeon, politician, CEO, etc etc bothers me.....I place muuuuch more value on getting to spend time with my guy. If he's never around, there's nothing keeping us together. No amount of money is worth it to me. of course I dont want some sloth hangin around, either though! Someone that has a 'normal' work week, comes home around 6 or 7, gets to spend weekends with me/us...... if they have certain jobs that require too much time away, which are usually the higher paying jobs, I wont date them. besides, it kinda shows me where there priorities are if they work all the time, and I want/expect to be more important than someones job and how much money they rake in unfortunately, my current b/f doesnt look at it the same way....he's going to work all the time so that he can make it to the top, be the best, etc at all costs (for his own pride, success, wealth, praise, etc...which is selfish IMO)
Mary3 Posted August 20, 2005 Posted August 20, 2005 Kat I agree with your post 100% ! But hey ....you know...with these men posting high incomes on their profile...whats the gaurantee that they are going to *spend* it on the girl ? Isn't it said that the richer ones are tigher...thats how they got rich ? Thankfully I always went for the chemistry.....I do want the man to be steadily employed...they can be employed at many occupations.....I love the diversity !
KellyBean18 Posted August 22, 2005 Posted August 22, 2005 Even a high income does not mean he has money. I dated a guy a bit older than I am and after paying for all of his toys I was lucky to get popcorn at the movies..
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