jimbob88 Posted October 31, 2017 Posted October 31, 2017 hi all, im so so mad at myself. basically to cut long story short i met a girl back in june when she was in a relationship (i was unaware she approached me online), she was beautiful it seemed to good to be true. we lived in his house when he was working away ( i was unaware of the relationship or that it was his house) until the truth all came out when she got caught out, anyway after the truth call came out ( 4 months down the line with me) she the discarded me like i never existed, previous to this she told me she really liked me and i booked a holiday for us that she never came on, they where so much manipulation and lies involved, it was like walking on egg shells, that i stupidly got attached to. It was so intense. ive not heard from her for 10 weeks and i stayed no contact and its been an emotional journey getting over her (as you all know) any way to cut long story short.... i have mutual friends and they was at the same event as her on Thursday, just them speaking about her to me triggered me. i deeply fell in love with this girl So i stupidly text her to see if we could be friends. She text back apologizing saying she was the one to blame and that we can be friends but not close friends as shes got back with her ex. She said she wants no hard feelings and wished me all he best. Has anyone ever been in this situation, i really dont know what to do? i re followed her on Instagram as she unblocked me and she didn't follow back, shes posted a new pic of her with the boy friend.. she wouldn't even let me tag her anywhere. i feel like ive taken a million steps back aftrer doing so well for x10 weeks. feel worthless again. sorry if this is a boring story i just need abit of guidance and if anyone can relate? thanks to everyone for taking the time to read the essay.
Zahara Posted October 31, 2017 Posted October 31, 2017 (edited) Why would you want to be friends with someone that played you for a fool? I can't imagine the psyche of someone that has a relationship with a guy, brings that guy into the home where she lives with her boyfriend, while her boyfriend was away working. Also, was there nothing in the home that gave you a clue that she had a boyfriend? Her bedroom with him -- I'm sure his things were around? Yuck. Aim higher. Have better standards. Block her on everything. Edited October 31, 2017 by Zahara 1
Buriall Posted October 31, 2017 Posted October 31, 2017 Dam dude you really wanna go that low? You find out she's with someone else and you still wanna be "friends" get ****ing real... Let the other guy know what she's done. She's playing both of you like a puppet.. Just feel sorry for the other guy who has no clue wtf is going on behind the scenes. And for the record.. When you find out someone is in a relationship.. Go look else where leave them to be..
dumbass2 Posted October 31, 2017 Posted October 31, 2017 You're mad at yourself for getting into this type of relationship and certainly missed on a lot of red flags and had blinders on because you fell hard for her, then you doubled down and wanted to be in her life any way she would have you. I was in something similar, but they weren't living together and had broken up, but she lied and it had only been maybe a month, so they were still in contact. I met her online. I feel hard and ignored the red flags. After the break up she got back in contact and I finally had to tell her I can't just be friends and we should not be in contact any more. I felt strong after I did that and got my self respect back. Not mad at myself any more for being stupid in love. You've got to end this and get the heck away from her. Regain your self respect and you will feel so much better. It's all on you. Take control back today!
edem Posted October 31, 2017 Posted October 31, 2017 Thanks for sharing. I'm sorry she "discarded" you without warning, then you put some distance between you two, and now those strong feelings are back. I've been through my own version. After this girl I really liked broke up with me a few years ago, I gave my friends strict instructions not to tell my anything about her--as in, don't tell me you saw her, you saw a pic of her FB or Instagram--nothing, nada.. It really helped me get over her. That was a few years ago and I thought it'd take me forever to get over her. Looking back, she's nothing but a memory now. You sound like a really good guy so my two cents is to talk to a good counselor, pastor, or a close friend and gush it all out. Then give you and her pleeeeenty of space. Hope this helps man.
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