Broken183 Posted October 29, 2017 Posted October 29, 2017 When he broke up with me I deleted all connections to him and his family. However, his family members have started friend requesting me and messaging me asking why we are no longer friends. I'm currently in NC and am trying my hardest not to break it, but I have an urge to message him and tell him to tell his family so that they stop contacting me. I posted here instead, but it's really hard to keep explaining to everyone what happened.
d0nnivain Posted October 29, 2017 Posted October 29, 2017 Respond to his family. Tell them you broke up & you hope they can respect your need for distance. I'm sure they will stop pestering you. 1
ExpatInItaly Posted October 29, 2017 Posted October 29, 2017 In your case, I actually would break No Contact and send him a message advising his friends and family members to stop contacting you. Talking to them is likely going to lead to more questions from their side, so I personally would go right to the source (so to speak), send a brief message and then block his number as well.
d0nnivain Posted October 29, 2017 Posted October 29, 2017 I disagree with ExPat. If your EX hasn't even told his family breaking NC to ask him to tell them to stop probably won't help. When you get a friend request or text from these folks I'd respond back with something like EX & I broke up. I'm not going to discuss the details with you. Although I enjoyed getting to know you, I hope you understand why we need to sever contact. Please respect my need for complete separation from your family Then block everybody. 1
Author Broken183 Posted October 29, 2017 Author Posted October 29, 2017 Whenever they ask me I say that it is not my place to discuss it and if you have questions then to ask him. It's just a really tempting excuse to break NC and I'm trying my hardest not to because I know ultimately it won't help.
HumanMachine Posted October 29, 2017 Posted October 29, 2017 Tell them to mind their own business and stop harassing you.
elaine567 Posted October 29, 2017 Posted October 29, 2017 It's just a really tempting excuse to break NC and I'm trying my hardest not to because I know ultimately it won't help. I am glad you recognise it as an excuse to break NC, and you are right, it will not help one iota. Stay strong.
spiderowl Posted October 30, 2017 Posted October 30, 2017 If his friends/family are contacting you, why not just respond with a standard message to each of them saying it was nice to meet them but X broke up with you and you wish to maintain distance now for that reason. If he hasn't told them, then you are at liberty to do so. I don't see why you should have to break no contact and ask him to tell them. If you don't want to tell them, that's another matter and you don't have to. They probably have no clue and I see no point in being rude to them or ignoring them because of the break-up. I know you do not owe them anything but do what your conscience dictates and come of out this with integrity. At least you will have the knowledge that you behaved with dignity and kindness where possible.
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