eternalspotless Posted October 20, 2017 Posted October 20, 2017 (edited) Hi, I met someone online I think it was around the 29th September, and we hit it off... she gave me her number quite quickly, maybe like the third message after saying "I think you and I are on similar wavelengths", something like that. So, I started messaging her and she wouldn't really reply. It annoyed me at first until we met and I jokingly mentioned her replying habits. She told me that she's dyslexic and finds it hard to READ the message and then construct a reply, and that I'm also not the only person who "has that complaint" about her messaging skills. OK so we've met twice so far (we were going to meet more but she was having a stressful time a work and was very apologetic about the fact that we couldn't meet once when we were meant to). When we're not physically together, we don't talk that often say except for a message every one or two days - these messages are often what we jokingly refer to as 'essays' because they're quite long. I've tried calling her but she doesn't really pick up, so I've left it. When we are physically together she is very engaging with me and something I've noticed she does is play with my hands a lot - the last time she was commenting on the size of my hands and measuring her hands with mine - I don't know if that's a flirty thing or what. She also told me that in relationships it takes her "a while to open up" and that she's "working on it, don't worry!" During our last 'date', she randomly said "I hope I'm not overstepping the boundaries, but what I'd really like is to come to yours and you can play some music for me?" I said oh yeah, we can do that... then about fifteen minutes later she bought it up again and said "I can come to yours, or we can go to mine and sit in the garden and chill...?" She also had her dog with her who she says is her "baby" and after I'd met him and played with him, she said "He likes you! You're so good with him, that's a relief" After that date I walked her to her road and when I got home she sent me a message that said "I was thinking as I walked home that I feel so comfortable with you, and I NEVER feel comfortable, what do you think that's about? Bring on the 26th..." (The 26th is the date we agreed for her to come over). So she's coming over on Thursday... but.... I don't get it, is she interested in me? I can't tell. The lack of contact between us when we're not physically together says she isn't, but the way she acts when we are says she might be. I wouldn't say that she has multiple people on the go as I've met people like that before and she is very sweet and just doesn't strike me as someone who messes people around. She's very kind and well-spoken etc, I've been messed around by women before and just don't get that vibe from her. I don't want to scare her off but at the same time I want this to progress a bit faster, I think. Edited October 20, 2017 by eternalspotless
kassy Posted October 20, 2017 Posted October 20, 2017 Why the rush? You have another date set. I'm not very good at messaging people I don't know well. As I get to know them I find I have more to message them. She has given you a reason for not messaging a lot. Maybe message and ask if you can call her sometime? Then you can touch base by phone. I'd say have a bit of patience, see how things go on the next few dates. She may warm up once she gets more comfortable with you and also more secure you like her. She sounds a bit nervous about it all. But she does sound interested to me. Have fun and enjoy the anticipation 1
act00 Posted October 20, 2017 Posted October 20, 2017 It sounds like she likes you. She's affectionate. She likes your hands and likes to touch them. I hope you're reciprocating that affection. It means a lot. She enjoys your company and is actively engaging in future time together. It can feel like momentum is getting lost without a lot of communication in the middle. She's not a big texter. Send her something funny or just toss her a text when you feel like it, but don't expect a conversation. Tell her you're looking forward to Thursday, tomorrow, the weekend, whatever applies. You'll feel more secure about the silence in between when you have something good and more solid going when you see each other in person and the relationship builds. Go in this as a positive. Don't second guess and worry so much. Everything you've shared sounds like interest to me. 1
smackie9 Posted October 20, 2017 Posted October 20, 2017 I get what you are saying...you expect a girl to be texting you sweet flirty messages with cute emojis and all that crap. This is how you measure their interest in you. Now I have a question. Say she really was into you, but will never text you a lot of send flirty texts.....would you be OK with that? or is it something you have an expectation for? 1
Author eternalspotless Posted October 20, 2017 Author Posted October 20, 2017 I get what you are saying...you expect a girl to be texting you sweet flirty messages with cute emojis and all that crap. This is how you measure their interest in you. Now I have a question. Say she really was into you, but will never text you a lot of send flirty texts.....would you be OK with that? or is it something you have an expectation for? Hm. I think because it's still very early on, with no 'routine' and no commitment to each other it's a slight issue with me. If we were to start 'dating' officially, and we were exclusive, I don't think it'd be that much of an issue. I think i'm just unsure of how to gauge her interest, right now.
Author eternalspotless Posted October 20, 2017 Author Posted October 20, 2017 She's gone away for the week with her family and is seeing me the day after she gets back; I've just sent her a short message saying that I hope she's having fun, etc - as someone in the thread said, I'm not expecting a conversation from it, it's just a quick, short, nice text. I suppose I really do like her. When we see each other the conversation (and the time!) flies past, there are never any awkward silences, and the amount of things we have in common is crazy from tiny minor things to life events... she's also incredibly pretty and modest; she has an air of humble-ness to her, which I think is sweet. I'm excited to see her, next week.
coolheadal Posted October 20, 2017 Posted October 20, 2017 She said you and her on the same path... So you have something to look forward too with. 1
Author eternalspotless Posted October 20, 2017 Author Posted October 20, 2017 She said you and her on the same path... So you have something to look forward too with. Yes, she did! Thank you. I like the message in your signature, too 1
Cobra_X Posted October 20, 2017 Posted October 20, 2017 So she's coming over on Thursday... but.... I don't get it, is she interested in me? I can't tell. The lack of contact between us when we're not physically together says she isn't, but the way she acts when we are says she might be. I wouldn't say that she has multiple people on the go as I've met people like that before and she is very sweet and just doesn't strike me as someone who messes people around. She's very kind and well-spoken etc, I've been messed around by women before and just don't get that vibe from her. I don't want to scare her off but at the same time I want this to progress a bit faster, I think. You have tons of good indicators going on. Her slow texting you means she it hitting up other guys. When she comes over on the 26th... I would be very physical with her. My suggestion would be to flirt for 20-30 minutes... then kissing for 45 minutes to an hour... then sex for 30 to 45 minutes. The farther you get the more of a leg up you have on the competition.
coolheadal Posted October 20, 2017 Posted October 20, 2017 Yes, she did! Thank you. I like the message in your signature, too Thank you for saying that.. I am all about love and romance. Whoever gets me will have that always and I am very affectionate too.. Women watch out! 1
Author eternalspotless Posted October 22, 2017 Author Posted October 22, 2017 Lol - I sent her the message on the 20th - basically saying I hope she's having fun and dropping a joke in about her dog... I have so far had no reply. This was on WhatsApp and she hasn't 'read' my message yet, but has been online several times. Obviously this was three days ago, now... I'm not going to text again and just see if Thursday still goes ahead... these time gaps are so tricky
staggerlee71 Posted October 22, 2017 Posted October 22, 2017 This girl likes you. BUT, slow your roll. you cant place yourself as a priority for her. she has to get there herself. Stop with the analyzing of how often she is texting and initiating. You should be setting dates and building a connection. Dont over invest here. it will be hard for you. go with the flow, you have to pursue a bit, without your signposts of reassurance, and go for what you want. Confidence brotha. whatever your doing is working right now 1
Author eternalspotless Posted October 22, 2017 Author Posted October 22, 2017 This girl likes you. BUT, slow your roll. you cant place yourself as a priority for her. she has to get there herself. Stop with the analyzing of how often she is texting and initiating. You should be setting dates and building a connection. Dont over invest here. it will be hard for you. go with the flow, you have to pursue a bit, without your signposts of reassurance, and go for what you want. Confidence brotha. whatever your doing is working right now Lol - I can't lie, this is the first time I've met someone who moves slowly like this. It's new to me. But I've played it well; I haven't sent too many messages, I've held back, I've kept it cool. So what SHE sees isn't any of this, lol. Thank God for LS, huh But yeah, Thursday
staggerlee71 Posted October 22, 2017 Posted October 22, 2017 Her moving slow is good. She is only half crazy!! Seriously, pursue don't chase, show interest, but don't show everything. give a little direction and wait for compliance. Keep an air of unknown(not games). All along leading her to feel secure to open up. its a delicate balance and challenge. your up for the task
coledvids Posted October 25, 2017 Posted October 25, 2017 So.... She got back today, and messaged me, "I'm back! Did you miss me?", and sent me loads of photos of things she did on the trip, without me even asking... that is the most she's ever messaged me, lol. I thought it was cute, tbh. She's still coming on Thursday, too... I can't lie, I'm nervous as hell. I'm going to cook for her which is major for me, lol. The last time I saw her, she invited me to something this weekend with her and her friends, which forsome reason I turned down.. but I'm now thinking I should go, and use this as an opportunity to meet again... would it be out of order to bring it up and say actually yeah, I'd like to go? My aim is to see her a couple times a week, and arrange these things in person to avoid the whole messaging thing as much as possible, I guess...
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