thedramirezx Posted October 18, 2017 Posted October 18, 2017 I need some advice here.... I have been with my girlfriend for 4 years. In general, it was an amazing time although we had our fair share of rough points. We were in a rough point a few weeks ago and I found out she was texting another guy pretty heavily for the past 3 days and had gone to his house that night while I was at work. When I confronted her, she lied about it but finally gave in after a few minutes and came clean. I know her so well, I knew something was wrong the second it happened. This was the beginning of the end. I decided since nothing physical happened, I could move on and we agreed she would no longer talk to this guy outside of strictly business at work. She told me she wasn't going to talk to him and I found out a few days later she started talking to him again. She proceeded to say she was very-very confused and wasn't sure what to do because she still loves me (Although not the same as she used to, apparently) but the guy admitted he has feelings for her and they get along amazingly. I told her shes confusing love for a fleeting feeling with a crush. It devastated me, but since this was nothing like the girl I had been dating for the past four years, I forgave her again. I knew she was confused. She was always the one who would talk about how she wanted to get married and would never leave me, literally days before she started talking to this guy. It was devastating but I thought we were going to move on. Then suddenly she just started being very weird after it. Saying how she wanted to move out and be independent and understand herself but didn't want to breakup then it just kept getting more weird and she wanted space and to not talk to me as much at the moment. I gave that too her, although probably not as quickly as I should have. Anyways, we finally brokeup two days ago, once again talking about how she is confused and how shes never had feelings like this for me and how she isn't even sure what she wants but she can't be in a relationship with me or else she wont figure herself out. I can tell some weird stuff is going on with her hormonaly and I feel maybe she will come around. She has never acted this weird in the 4 years we have been together. I will admit, I've begged for her back like a little bitch, twice now. I love her, she still loves me but she did say she doesn't feel exactly the same as she used to. I tried to explain shes just confused and love does fluctuate through the good and the bad but she can't compare it to some guy she barely knows. I don't know what to do. Here is where it gets even more tricky.... I have a 3 week long vacation planned in about two weeks throughout various countries in Europe. We have always traveled together and traveling is our happy place visiting various countries and continents. The time when we seldom fight, and seldom have any problems at all. Traveling is one of the main things that has made our relationship amazing thus far, to be honest. Anyways, I am unsure of what to do, people keep telling me not to talk to her but that is also hard. Should I go on this trip with her? Should I not talk to her at all NC (She still lives with me) before the trip then go and hope something turns around? Should I just give everything up and go our own seperate ways? I was always the one who doubted the relationship, never her so I have an understanding of what it is like to be confused and to have a crush while dating so I am trying to sympathize her. Help me out here!
Jamess1 Posted October 18, 2017 Posted October 18, 2017 She has finaly started having sex with the other guy, and she's leaving u for him. Women never tell men this directly becoz to women it's very dificult to end a relationship than it is to start a knew one, she wants u available as option B incase option A disapoints. No one breaks up with a guy to ' figure herself out' or to be single : women monkey branch, she leaves u for another,always. By refusing to see the obvious u r pushing her away, u r confirming that u r a ' beta', needy, optionless and not confident. If u want to attract her breakup with her immediately, start acting like u want her to move out more than she wants to move out herself. Start pushing her away, and acting like u realy don't need her, she wil start to doubt herself and start reaching out to u. And don't even try to rationalize to her how she is making a mistake by dating the knew guy, or how she is throwing away 4 yrs etc genuine desire from a woman isn't rational and cnt be negotiated. In fact by begging her to stay u r confirming that the other guy is higher value than u r. In fact be aloof, be indifferent, and gladly encourage her to leave you for the other guy, be more eager than she is . . . What I am telling u works, u wil get other advice her about crap like comunication, space etc it doesn't work, women respond to game. . . .I am a guy who pick up women for one night stand in a few hours . .even married women,so trust me it works, stop the needines and begging. It's a game my friend, whether u know it or not, whether u play or not,it's all about the game.I can even tell u the game the other guy using to get your girlfriend of 4 yrs in a matter of days! That other guy is playing, stop begging and start playing. 2
Torreskingtonw Posted October 18, 2017 Posted October 18, 2017 My ex-wife and I had always managed to stay friendly after our divorce, but I always wanted to get back together with her, and she was never sure. So, I thought it was about time I MADE her sure! All i took was a visit to the website and a request for a specific love spell, and Dr Muna spells powers began to work their magic. The spell is working because guess what: My ex is soon to be my wife again! This is nothing short of a miracle. Thank you, Dr Muna spell. Words are not enough. Get in touch with [email protected] This spell can be a great help to whom are emotionally break down.
d0nnivain Posted October 18, 2017 Posted October 18, 2017 You have been together since she was 16 & you were 18. You don't have any experience dating others. She's not really confused. The only thing holding her back was the fear of the unknown, what it's like to be in a relationship with somebody other than you. She has decided she wants to try with this other guy. I would not go on a 3 week trip with her. I'd try to find a buddy to buy her out of her tickets etc assuming you can get the airline to agree or I'd sell my tickets to somebody else. Worst case scenario you cancel what you can & eat your share. Spending it with your EX is a recipe for disaster. Learn about NC as healing tool. Chasing her & begging her while she has a new BF won't work. I can't believe he's OK with her spending 3 weeks alone with you.
edem Posted October 20, 2017 Posted October 20, 2017 Thanks for sharing and I year ya, man. I feel for you. I can tell you really love her and have been committed to her in your heart for four years. It sounds to me like she needs some space, as hard as that might be for you. Have you thought about talking to her and taking a break? What I mean is, have a set amount of time--like two weeks, four weeks, or whatever--don't contact her and make a point to get back after that and see how you both feel. By that time she might have some more concrete answers. As far as the travel-vacation goes, that's up to you. Do you think that would make things better for her or worse at this point? And how would your heart do? Also, in my experienced talking to a counselor has helped. I hope this helps and I hope for the best for you.
Recommended Posts