TheBathWater Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 (edited) Just started seeing a woman a couple of weeks ago. The first night I met her I figured she wasn't into me. She flaked on our first date but rescheduled/kept the next one. When we met, she kept disqualifying herself and didn't seem to respond much to some obvious jokes I made. She seemed a little aloof, but not intentionally. We did wind up back at my place and hooked up. At some point she told me she had a hard time making friends in high school and wasn't good at socializing, so I thought maybe that was the explanation for her behavior earlier. But I felt somewhat used, I must admit. I felt like I was the one making efforts to connect, while she just sort of hung around until the sex happened. But then, surprise! She did text me the next day saying she had fun. She also initiated an attempt to secure a second date shortly after. All good signs, I thought...until she made sure to say though that she "had a healthy sex drive." I figured once again she was just in this for hooking up. What's a gentleman to do? I invited her over to my place a week later and we hooked up again. The conversation was much better this time, I thought. She even said something to the effect of, "I feel really playful with you more than most guys, and it's cause I like you." I had her text me when she got home and also made sure to send her a flirty follow-up text the next day. A few days go by and I figured I'd hit her up again. I texted her today to see how her weekend was and when she'd like to meet up again next. She did respond back and told me she had a great weekend but didn't acknowledge or respond to what I asked about when she's free next. Argh! I simply didn't respond back because I felt like I'd either have to reiterate myself (and of course she saw what I wrote), or I'd have to pretend like she didn't acknowledge my question. Both feel like desperate responses to me, and not how I want to come off. Guys with experience (not women, please), how would you handle this? My thinking is that she's either just using me for sex as I felt she was and is now backing off, she doesn't have very good social etiquette, or maybe something else. I'd like to see her again and get to know her more. Seemed like we really clicked in the bedroom and had a few things in common that we discovered. Edited October 16, 2017 by TunaInTheBrine
coolheadal Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 One off... Booty call (just they come over and do it and leave) This is the sort you may have. Well don't contact her.. See what happens? Nothing move on. Knock at the door then you have to wonder how things would be but you don't want a booty call woman do you? I say nope!
Author TheBathWater Posted October 16, 2017 Author Posted October 16, 2017 Well don't contact her.. See what happens? Nothing move on. Pretty much what I was thinking but needed some reassurance. you don't want a booty call woman do you? Ideally, no, but she's pretty phenomenal in bed and I'd definitely have her over again. lol. But I can only go on like that for so long before I either want more from a woman or I simply feel that the connection is running dry (no pun intended) and it was just a fling.
coolheadal Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 I had that with a girl name Amy, I'll miss her but she had ADHD, can't deal with that behavior. Plus she had 3 kids she told me they also had ADHD. She told me that her kids would terrorize me. I wasn't scared off by that. ADHD is nothing to play around with. She always seen distant. No care no love. She was Taco Bell GM. No I didn't get taco food for free. Never asked her. You want a woman that wants you long-term not short-term casual sex, quickie or anything else. AMY was there for me but not 100% She was the only Hybrid GF I had..
Author TheBathWater Posted October 16, 2017 Author Posted October 16, 2017 You want a woman that wants you long-term not short-term casual sex, quickie or anything else. That's what I say I want, but I repeatedly wind up in situations like this where I'm the hookup partner or "the other man." The women who do want LTRs with me are often not very attractive in my eyes, and I find myself more willing to be single, frustrated, and have casual sex with various hotties. I guess both ways are "settling" in my eyes since neither option gets me what I want. But I know I'd rather die single and alone this way then settle into a LTR that I wasn't crazy about and sill die miserable. Sometimes I wonder if I should just stop resisting fate and embrace my philandering ways full-time with zero plans of ever committing unless a woman pursues me and I end up falling for her.
coolheadal Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 Nature rules we can't change that fact. I learn what happens with me happens for a reason. I always tend to get women that use to work in a hotel cleaning force. LOL I try to get a goody-to-shoes girl and end up with a tough woman! LOL I try to go after blonde blue eyes are my favorite but then I find out they had more than one husband might never got a divorce because they figure it's just paper. LOL I not a fan brown eye girls yet 95% I've dated are! LOL I invite women over here and they have a fun time with me.Sex is up in the air if it happens then I go for it! LOL I still can't get them to run around my house nude.. No one can see in or out. I live in a cave! LOL Anyway you have fun with who you date because I bet that's the only kind of women that you end up with. Never get what you really want. But I date good looking women I will not settle for less. I changed my appearance to look modern and healthy! I don't want to be with a woman who can't control her eating, smoking or whatever they like to do but not healthy. If you can't keep your house clean then I don't want you with me. Bad enough I had a blonde with a white Toyota S and it took me 2 hours to get the dirt off the white paint. Yuck!
BaileyB Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 Not that it's possible to diagnose anything online, but your description makes me wonder if she is on the autism spectrum. 2
thefooloftheyear Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 Yep....She sounds like she has some behavioral disorder... Even though she's probably an easy lay down, i don't have the temperament to deal with that type of insanity....I need calm, strong and self assured people in my life..What's her motivation? who knows..?? It's your call, man....Play her or trade her... TFY
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