Author cbplayer Posted November 3, 2017 Author Posted November 3, 2017 You don't have you own place there is also the hotel suite (yes a suite) I usually get those when I don't have my own place and out of town get together. It will be very hard to get invited to her place unless she suggest it to you. She might be living with family as well. Might have to get that hotel suite after all if that's the case. How is this girl and you otherwise everything good? Things seemed pretty good. We’ve got a lot of rapport. She has her own place. Is my second date idea good? I wanna play pool.
TheTraveler Posted November 3, 2017 Posted November 3, 2017 Thanks for the advice. I saw her at our dance class again and she suggested that we go out again. I'm thinking of going to play some pool. I do want to get to know her better but I want to advance this sexually pretty soon so that I don't get friend-zoned. I don't have my own place... so what would you guys suggest? How do I get invited to her place? Pick things to do near her place.
Author cbplayer Posted November 4, 2017 Author Posted November 4, 2017 (edited) So we went on our third date at a pool hall. Everything seemed great however, towards the end of the night we were both drunk and I told her how badly I wanted to make out with her then I went in for a kiss but she dodged(we have kissed before). Then we left the pool hall and tried to get a kiss again she said "I don't find anything attractive about you" and she kept rambling about rubbish because she was drunk. She called me later because she thought I had her keys and I asked her why she didn't give me a kiss and why she said she wasn't attracted to me(b/c she has shown pretty clear signs that she is/was attracted to me). She responded "haha I was drunk. No I didn't mean that .I don't even remember that. I feel horrible for saying that." I figured people tend to be more honest when they're drunk.. What do I make of this? Abort? Edited November 4, 2017 by cbplayer
Author cbplayer Posted November 5, 2017 Author Posted November 5, 2017 Later I asked her "are you actually interested, don't wanna waste time" and she said she is... but I feel like there's no hope at this point...
Author cbplayer Posted November 6, 2017 Author Posted November 6, 2017 Any opinions? I just don't want this thread to be forgotten..lol
Miss Spider Posted November 6, 2017 Posted November 6, 2017 I think you should move on. she's not into you 2
Vyliss Posted November 6, 2017 Posted November 6, 2017 (edited) Be a gentlemen - offer to pay anyway, it will leave a good impression on her. Now, if she's a classy lady she will pay anyway But at least this way you leave a good impression either way. Edit: Oops, saw your latest updates. Well it's weird she said she found nothing attractive about you and then tried to backpedal her way out? I'd stop pushing so hard on the physical stuff and make her work for you a bit. Start dating others as well in the meantime. With that kind of comment, I'd need more proof from her that she's actually into you. Edited November 6, 2017 by Vyliss
Author cbplayer Posted November 6, 2017 Author Posted November 6, 2017 Be a gentlemen - offer to pay anyway, it will leave a good impression on her. Now, if she's a classy lady she will pay anyway But at least this way you leave a good impression either way. Edit: Oops, saw your latest updates. Well it's weird she said she found nothing attractive about you and then tried to backpedal her way out? I'd stop pushing so hard on the physical stuff and make her work for you a bit. Start dating others as well in the meantime. With that kind of comment, I'd need more proof from her that she's actually into you. I wanna believe she’s still interested like she claimed but I’ve always thought that alcohol is truth serum. I guess should give up. We had been in the dancing my class for months prior to dating so she must have already known if she liked me or not. And if she didn’t , why go on dates and kisss me ?
smackie9 Posted November 6, 2017 Posted November 6, 2017 That's why we go out on dates....to see if we really are attracted to the person. You know, chemistry through interaction, feeling each other out, getting to know one another. For her, my guess it's not working out. Or she's incredibly insecure when getting too close to someone. Not everyone is ready to crawl over each other after 3 dates. Maybe she is seeing someone else and doesn't feel right to let this progress physically.
Author cbplayer Posted November 6, 2017 Author Posted November 6, 2017 That's why we go out on dates....to see if we really are attracted to the person. You know, chemistry through interaction, feeling each other out, getting to know one another. For her, my guess it's not working out. Or she's incredibly insecure when getting too close to someone. Not everyone is ready to crawl over each other after 3 dates. Maybe she is seeing someone else and doesn't feel right to let this progress physically. Does the fact she told she’s still interested despite what she said while drunk, mean anything ?
normal person Posted November 6, 2017 Posted November 6, 2017 Does the fact she told she’s still interested despite what she said while drunk, mean anything ? If she said that while drunk, she's got a lot of work to do rectify it, not just say "oh, I didn't mean that." If she's as interested as she says she is, she needs to prove it. Otherwise, move on, she's just wasting your time. If you're having these kinds of issues early on, I don't foresee it getting any better anyways. I'd cut contact with her, see how she responded, and then maybe entertain the idea of giving her another shot. But probably not.
Author cbplayer Posted November 11, 2017 Author Posted November 11, 2017 If she said that while drunk, she's got a lot of work to do rectify it, not just say "oh, I didn't mean that." If she's as interested as she says she is, she needs to prove it. Otherwise, move on, she's just wasting your time. If you're having these kinds of issues early on, I don't foresee it getting any better anyways. I'd cut contact with her, see how she responded, and then maybe entertain the idea of giving her another shot. But probably not. So I saw her last night at dance class. We ended up talking about that night because she wanted to know how she was acting b/c she had a total blackout. I told her everything and she was embarrassed was convinced that I said something to provoke her to say she didn't find me attractive. Then towards to end of our meetup she asked me to meet up next week. I kind of expected more apologies and affirmations that she finds me attractive but I guess her inviting me out is an affirmation?
d0nnivain Posted November 11, 2017 Posted November 11, 2017 CBPlayer I think you are wasting your time going out with this woman again, even if she asked. She doesn't want what you want -- kissing or more. She point blank told you that she doesn't find you attractive. Even if she was drunk when she said it, that's no excuse. She still said it. In vino veritas. If she wasn't thinking it, she wouldn't have said it. Drunks don't have the mental capacity to make stuff up. Whatever you do on this 4th date, do it sober. If you don't get a kiss, for heaven's sake walk away before this woman shreds more of your ego.
GemmaUK Posted November 11, 2017 Posted November 11, 2017 So she really was blind drunk and can't remember a thing - that safely implies that she meat what she said. I reckon she is trying to do something different dating wise and asking men out but also going for those she isn't physically attracted to to give it a go. I've attempted the 'dating those I am not attracted to' thing a couple of times - it doesn't work out well. The chemistry - shot. Pheromones - shot. On top of which I just got the BO scent from them both - they weren't switched on enough to know the difference between deodorant and antiperspirant nor that old clothes need replacing, or kept 'well', need more than a 40 degree wash in the pits area. Intelligence/common sense/streetwise levels - shot. Attraction- already known to be shot. Sexual chemistry - shot - see above for a very few reasons. It's up to you if you want to play along but you're just an experiment IMO.
FilterCoffee Posted November 11, 2017 Posted November 11, 2017 I'd take her word and give her 1 more date. Try not to worry about her drunk talk otherwise, you'll come across as upset and she'll lose her attraction for you. She did apologize and make plans for next week. If she gives you a bad vibe after the date, move on.
Highndry Posted November 11, 2017 Posted November 11, 2017 She told you she wasn't even remotely attracted to you, then refused to kiss you. If that doesn't sum things up, I don't know what would. That being said, her getting blackout drunk is a major turnoff, not to mention red flag. Are you attracted to alcoholics? I would run fast and far from this one. 1
smackie9 Posted November 11, 2017 Posted November 11, 2017 Does the fact she told she’s still interested despite what she said while drunk, mean anything ? Go by their actions not by what they say to you.....people think alcohol is a truth serum. But in reality it's not always true, it distorts our perception, we find people attractive we would never find good looking when sober, we tell lies, tell bs stories...we all have had our regrets after a night of drunkenness. There was this sign above the bar in the club I worked at, it said: "No one is ugly after 2am". 2
coolheadal Posted November 11, 2017 Posted November 11, 2017 Later I asked her "are you actually interested, don't wanna waste time" and she said she is... but I feel like there's no hope at this point... No drunk state of mind is not a good answer. Truth is in the eyes of the beholder! What I mean is when you's with you dancing and she's interested in you. Stop beating up yourself like this my friend.
Author cbplayer Posted November 12, 2017 Author Posted November 12, 2017 It blows my mind that she’s called me attractive a few times of her own volition . She would say “you look cute in the outfit” or “I’m sure you got a lot of girls with your good looks and muscles”. After our second date she told me that she had such a great time. She kissed me and she said she doesn’t kiss anyone unless she really feels it and she said she felt it for me so she kissed me. Then a few days later asked me out on another date, the one that became a disaster. Then I saw her last night and everything seemed fine and she asked me out again . I mean it seemed like things went well before and after that crazy night. Can’t understand women lol.
Author cbplayer Posted November 12, 2017 Author Posted November 12, 2017 CBPlayer I think you are wasting your time going out with this woman again, even if she asked. She doesn't want what you want -- kissing or more. She point blank told you that she doesn't find you attractive. Even if she was drunk when she said it, that's no excuse. She still said it. In vino veritas. If she wasn't thinking it, she wouldn't have said it. Drunks don't have the mental capacity to make stuff up. Whatever you do on this 4th date, do it sober. If you don't get a kiss, for heaven's sake walk away before this woman shreds more of your ego. I'll definitely walk away if I don't get a kiss.
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