The girl I like told me she doesn't want a serious relationship now.

[throwaway1224ep]

This is much longer than I thought, bear with me because this is all necessary information (and a bit complicated).

 

I don’t know what to do about the whole thing and I need advice.

 

Firstly, some backstory. She has known that I like her for over a year, she just had a bf at the time (now ex) and she was mature about it. She treated me like everybody else and was even a bit teasy and flirty from time to time. We got on well too, laughed at each other’s jokes etc. I respected her relationship and she respected my feelings.

 

Her ex on the other hand, suspected I liked her and felt a bit insecure about the whole thing. He said to me that she said that I made her uncomfortable and I was going to shoot up the school but spare her because I liked her. (I am the opposite type of person who would shoot up a school as well. I have friends and don’t look like a creep, even above average looks depending on who you ask.)

 

She then became quite embarrassed after she found out and was a bit shy around me and distanced herself from me. We still talked from time to time and she seemed happy when we did talk. As time went on, I begun to think that what her bf said was true and I made her uncomfortable.

 

We were doing group work in a class and it was just the three of us. It was really awkward at first but we all pretended that nothing happened and she seemed like she didn't like him and was flirty with me in front of him.

 

They broke up in July (I didn’t know until recently) and she got a new boyfriend within a weak (but more casual, I didn’t know about him either.)

 

I texted her in August a week before school started saying:

 

“I want to say sorry.

 

I like you and I know you don’t like me.

 

For the past year, I have pestered you and I am genuinely sorry.

 

I made you uncomfortable and I feel terrible about it.

 

I’d like us to remain friends but it’s your choice.”

 

She replied with this, it’s one big paragraph.

 

“Hey (me) don’t be silly I never felt uncomfortable at all I’ve always thought you were so friendly and I know about what (ex) said to you that time on the ski trip and it was so out of line I was really embarrassed because he made it seem like I was saying all of the stuff he told you if that makes sense! Don’t be sorry and of course we can remain friends”

 

I replied back with: “Thanks, it really means a lot. I never thought you said what he said. Hope you enjoyed your summer. See you in school!”

 

I then snapchatted her a few days later about her being in the same restaurant halfway across the country that I was in a few days before and she thought it was funny and did a few ugly faces and then a few flirty ones. I have since snapped her about her friend being a bit drunk on her story as joke and we had another flirty/ugly face thing going.

 

This is back to more recent events, which is where it really gets complicated so bear with me.

 

Back in school she seemed shy around me, which was understandable given what I texted her. She was still friendly when we talked but she touched her hair a lot and did some unnecessary laughing. Sometimes I caught her looking at me and she would look away fast and she would look down and to the side when walking past me. This has stopped and she now normally smiles and holds eye contact for a few seconds.

 

I found out about the new bf when I was walking my dog and saw them together on the beach. I played it off and said it was random to see her there and she said my dog was cute etc. And I said see you tomorrow and walked off. When I was walking away, I looked back and she was looking at me looking like a mix between sadness and curiosity.

 

I went to a party late and she seemed really happy to see me when I eventually showed up. She slapped my ass with a rubber chicken when I was looking in the fridge and ran away laughing her head off.

 

Her ex kissed her best friend (who was in a relationship) at the party and I talked to her to see if her best friend and her boyfriend were still together and she said they were. I replied with “what (ex) did was messed up” and she said it “wasn’t that bad” and I agreed with “it was only a kiss” and she replied with “you know yourself” with a flirty face, teasing me again which hasn’t happened in about 8 months.

 

We then began talking about her ex who she broke up with because she was embarrassed to be around him but she still has feelings for him and her new boyfriend is to get over those feelings. She also cited that him starting that rumor was the beginning of the end of that relationship.

 

I told her that I still liked her. She said she knew that but she was already dating her new boyfriend before I texted her that time and doesn’t want a serious relationship so soon after breaking things off with her ex. She said she wanted time to think about everything and teared up a bit. I hugged her and she pecked me on the lips before walking away and I didn’t see her again that night.

 

The next Monday, she smiled at me and kept looking at me. I just smiled back but mostly avoided her as I don’t know what to think. She kept blocking my way and saying sorry, it happened about 5 times even if she was just walking past me.

 

What should I do? I have never been in a situation as complicated as this. Her relationship with her "rebound" seems to be serious enough.

[YummySarah92]

Please move on and don't look back - even if it might seem hard at first.

[stillafool]

Yes move on, speak and be polite then look away. If she wants you at this point it is up to her to make it happen. Be strong. Girls like strong guys.

[Miss Spider]

Definitely move on