CoolJoe Posted October 5, 2017 Posted October 5, 2017 My girlfriend and I have been one month official now and it's been awesome. Granted, this is the honeymoon phase so obviously we're both putting our best foot forward, but just earlier tonight she brought something up that some people might have flipped out about (I wish to keep the specifics private, though). But I was calm, rational and responded in a loving, supportive and unselfish way. She responded in kind. Effective communication is freaking awesome! Also, having a partner that "gets it" and "gets you" is one of the best feelings in the world. In general, our communication and listening styles mesh really well, and I know we'll eventually have our fair share of arguments, but I have a good gut feeling we'll be able to handle such issues with a certain level of respect, clarity and open honest communication. I know things won't always be smooth sailing but we're currently building a very strong foundation built on mutual trust, affection and honesty. It's been great. She's easily been the best girlfriend I have ever had, and I have high hopes for where this relationship may go. Still, taking and enjoying it one day at a time. Wanted to encourage anyone out there struggling with dating: Work on yourself, maintain perspective and know it's just about finding the right match at the right time. It's all about compatibility and chemistry. It took me YEARS to find my GF, but it was worth it. If it happened to me, it certainly can happen to you as well! 7
Gaeta Posted October 5, 2017 Posted October 5, 2017 That's wonderful ! All the people on here struggling already through their 2-3-4 first dates I wish they knew that it's not suppose to be hard! When you meet someone compatible that liked you as much as you liked them it just unfolds naturally with no problems and no anxiety!! When I started dating my bf I never had to ask myself 'does he like me', never! It was so obvious he liked me I didn't have to think about it! 8
No_Go Posted October 5, 2017 Posted October 5, 2017 That's wonderful ! All the people on here struggling already through their 2-3-4 first dates I wish they knew that it's not suppose to be hard! When you meet someone compatible that liked you as much as you liked them it just unfolds naturally with no problems and no anxiety!! When I started dating my bf I never had to ask myself 'does he like me', never! It was so obvious he liked me I didn't have to think about it! Well I had zero anxiety with my ex: he scheduled every next date before the end of the current one, made plans months ahead, made me meet his entire family at 8 weeks... And the whole relationship was terrible regardless. In my mind now no anxiety means I'm not terribly interested at the person and can afford to lose him. So I'm not sure it's a good thing to have no anxiety in the beginning ... At least from what I've experienced so far. 2
Gaeta Posted October 5, 2017 Posted October 5, 2017 Well I had zero anxiety with my ex: he scheduled every next date before the end of the current one, made plans months ahead, made me meet his entire family at 8 weeks... And the whole relationship was terrible regardless. No matter if the relationship will end up being a good one or not, when 2 people are interested in each other there is no anxiety, it unfolds naturally. OP is experiencing this because they are both into each other. It doesn't mean their relationship will last, it doesn't even mean they will make it to 8 weeks but it does mean that right now they are both equally interested in each other. 3
No_Go Posted October 5, 2017 Posted October 5, 2017 No matter if the relationship will end up being a good one or not, when 2 people are interested in each other there is no anxiety, it unfolds naturally. OP is experiencing this because they are both into each other. It doesn't mean their relationship will last, it doesn't even mean they will make it to 8 weeks but it does mean that right now they are both equally interested in each other. I guess you have a point. In my case I was just reciprocating to match his level of effort, thinking back on it I didn't have a genuine spark with him and that backfired. But I suppose that's not the typical scenario and hopefully not OP's.
heavenonearth Posted October 5, 2017 Posted October 5, 2017 Well, I have anxiety about my relationship albeit things being perfect and going smoothly... we have great chemistry and connection and we can talk about things and communicate wonderfully, but... but... everyone has baggage. Mine is that I have fear of abandonment due to something that happened when I was a child. This I carry with me into every relationship, also this one. My anxiety surrounding us does not stem from something that does not work with the two of us, or something that he does wrong... it's within me! So sometimes, anxiety can be a factor, even if everything is going well. But yeah, I think it's nice to hear the positive stories as well. I do hope that my anxiety eventually will fade, and I realize that this R is not like my past ones and that this has nothing to do with my mom leaving my dad when I was 9, LOL! 2
mortensorchid Posted October 6, 2017 Posted October 6, 2017 I'm glad to hear someone is happy in the world. Nothing worse than having the wrong one with you. God speed ...
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