Failureisanoption Posted October 3, 2017 Posted October 3, 2017 I know it's gonna get better. I know I can find a way out of this. I know I can find somebody more compatible. I know there are other fish in the sea I know I can take this time to work on myself. My friends tell me. My family tells me I think even my goldfish is telling me. And everybody is right except tonight, I'm not hearing it. I'm not hearing any of it Logic is always right, but my heart isn't a brain, it's heart. And boy, is it breaking tonight. It's been two months since we've broken up and I operate on different levels of sadness every day. There's the Positive sadness when I think I'm going to be okay, but in the back of my mind she's still there. Then there's the "I'm going to run into traffic as soon as I find my shoes" sadness that is thick as molasses and hangs on me so heavily I wonder how I find my way out of bed. Tonight I know her new bf is sleeping over and I'm trying to hold it together but the night is drawing out like a blade and with each moment it seems to hurt more and more. I know all of this is rambling and weird but so am I tonight. I wasn't looking for advice. I wasn't looking to commiserate. I just needed to vent. I know I'll get through this somehow. I'm just sad. Maybe tomorrow will be better. god dammit. 5
MikeLeno Posted October 3, 2017 Posted October 3, 2017 I know it's gonna get better. I know I can find a way out of this. I know I can find somebody more compatible. I know there are other fish in the sea I know I can take this time to work on myself. My friends tell me. My family tells me I think even my goldfish is telling me. And everybody is right except tonight, I'm not hearing it. I'm not hearing any of it Logic is always right, but my heart isn't a brain, it's heart. And boy, is it breaking tonight. It's been two months since we've broken up and I operate on different levels of sadness every day. There's the Positive sadness when I think I'm going to be okay, but in the back of my mind she's still there. Then there's the "I'm going to run into traffic as soon as I find my shoes" sadness that is thick as molasses and hangs on me so heavily I wonder how I find my way out of bed. Tonight I know her new bf is sleeping over and I'm trying to hold it together but the night is drawing out like a blade and with each moment it seems to hurt more and more. I know all of this is rambling and weird but so am I tonight. I wasn't looking for advice. I wasn't looking to commiserate. I just needed to vent. I know I'll get through this somehow. I'm just sad. Maybe tomorrow will be better. god dammit. I know how you feel. If you want, I don't mind pm-ing/or email, since I don't see the pm button, to discuss this and listen
Octavian8 Posted October 3, 2017 Posted October 3, 2017 I feel for you man I really do. What you wrote captured my feelings exactly. I feel the same as you. It doesn't matter what everyone says or even what you say to yourself. It's an emotional battle in your own heart not an intellectual debate. I don't have advice but I just wanna say you're not alone in your suffering there's lots of us here suffering together with you. 2
HumanMachine Posted October 3, 2017 Posted October 3, 2017 Nothing equals this pain.. knowing your loved one is being intimate with someone other than you.. Stay strong, you will get through this. 2
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