smackie9 Posted October 1, 2017 Posted October 1, 2017 If you are the one that approaches her all the time, the probability that she knows something is up then I would say yes.....she sees that you as interested in her but doesn't have the ballz to ask her out, which can be disappointing. Women don't like guys with very little confidence in themselves....it plays against you of ever having a chance with her. Tip: you ask them out if YOU are interested in them...you don't wait around trying to figure out if they are interested in you or not. That's the coward's way. You shouldn't give a rats ass if she does, you like her you ask her out to find out THAT WAY if she is interested. 2
Author Sdives Posted October 1, 2017 Author Posted October 1, 2017 If you are the one that approaches her all the time, the probability that she knows something is up then I would say yes.....she sees that you as interested in her but doesn't have the ballz to ask her out, which can be disappointing. Women don't like guys with very little confidence in themselves....it plays against you of ever having a chance with her. Tip: you ask them out if YOU are interested in them...you don't wait around trying to figure out if they are interested in you or not. That's the coward's way. You shouldn't give a rats ass if she does, you like her you ask her out to find out THAT WAY if she is interested. This is some good philosophy here. Very well said post. I agree with you. I just need to feel like I have enough comfort with her that it wouldn't be weird and I have enough to go on that she might reciprocate. She must know somethings up I just hope she sees it coming. I feel like after four chat couple days back Im starting to have some knowledge about her life so she's less of a stranger.
Steve51 Posted October 1, 2017 Posted October 1, 2017 Actually it is the opposite. Women love when I man listens to them, asks them questions about them and things everything they say is interesting. In fact, this is one of the effects of romantic love along with wanting to be with her as much as possible and overlooking any faults she may have. Talking too much can be seen as a lack of confidence or nervousness. It is what we call in the business, over selling. Women like a man to be interested in them. I did very well for myself back in the day by focusing on what the woman had to say. I said little about myself. Just enough to make her interested in seeing me again. Most women will pick up on your looks,intelligence, sense of humor and what I call class, after talking to you. As I was once told, most women will know in a few minutes if they will have sex with you or like you. First impressions always help. When you do all the talking or talk too much it sometimes is seen as insecurity, conceit or overselling.
Author Sdives Posted October 1, 2017 Author Posted October 1, 2017 Actually it is the opposite. Women love when I man listens to them, asks them questions about them and things everything they say is interesting. In fact, this is one of the effects of romantic love along with wanting to be with her as much as possible and overlooking any faults she may have. Talking too much can be seen as a lack of confidence or nervousness. It is what we call in the business, over selling. Women like a man to be interested in them. I did very well for myself back in the day by focusing on what the woman had to say. I said little about myself. Just enough to make her interested in seeing me again. Most women will pick up on your looks,intelligence, sense of humor and what I call class, after talking to you. As I was once told, most women will know in a few minutes if they will have sex with you or like you. First impressions always help. When you do all the talking or talk too much it sometimes is seen as insecurity, conceit or overselling. She seems to brighten up if that makes sense when I take an interest in her and what she does. Just general stuff work school. I talk about myself briefly and then turn it back to her so she can talk about whatever.
smackie9 Posted October 1, 2017 Posted October 1, 2017 She seems to brighten up if that makes sense when I take an interest in her and what she does. Just general stuff work school. I talk about myself briefly and then turn it back to her so she can talk about whatever. This is what you do...... ON A DATE. 3
Author Sdives Posted October 1, 2017 Author Posted October 1, 2017 This is what you do...... ON A DATE. Asking now would be weird. It just would. Another time ago I asked a woman out, but we talked here and there for about two months, it made sense as we didnt see each other everyday hence the long time . Each interaction got better that it made sense to ask her out when I did. It was ready for the next level.
smackie9 Posted October 1, 2017 Posted October 1, 2017 (edited) It's not weird. Maybe it's just me, but I like men who are bold and confident. My husband asked me out within 20 mins of talking to each other. I never needed someone to build a report with me to say yes to a date. It's either I'm attracted or I'm not....usually within the first 7 seconds as they say. Honestly this is you who needs to spend all this time chatting, not them. This has a lot to do with your confidence level...not their interest level. Edited October 1, 2017 by smackie9 3
Author Sdives Posted October 1, 2017 Author Posted October 1, 2017 It's not weird. Maybe it's just me, but I like men who are bold and confident. My husband asked me out within 20 mins of talking to each other. I never needed someone to build a report with me to say yes to a date. It's either I'm attracted or I'm not....usually within the first 7 seconds as they say. Honestly this is you who needs to spend all this time chatting, not them. This has a lot to do with your confidence level...not their interest level. Perhaps, it just feels too soon
smackie9 Posted October 1, 2017 Posted October 1, 2017 No such thing. I'm telling you ....as a female, and how we think. We know if we are interested or not the min we look and speak to you. We don't need warming up. If that was the case, there would be a lot of single people out there. We know what we want. 1
Miss Spider Posted October 1, 2017 Posted October 1, 2017 (edited) If she's like most women she's already made up her mind about whether she's into you enough for a date or not by now. There is a segment of women who like to build up a whole lot of rapport but they are a minority. If she's into you, pussyfooting from there on out is just going to make her more confused and give other guys more opportunity to get her attention. If she's not into you, she's just enjoying the conversation or being polite I highly doubt it will change the outcome one bit Edited October 1, 2017 by Cookiesandough 4
Author Sdives Posted October 1, 2017 Author Posted October 1, 2017 In some ways I havent even decided
smackie9 Posted October 1, 2017 Posted October 1, 2017 It wouldn't kill you to ask her out. That is how we really know about someone...ON A DATE. 2
joseb Posted October 1, 2017 Posted October 1, 2017 Asking now would be weird. It just would. Another time ago I asked a woman out, but we talked here and there for about two months. You are just making excuses. Own the fact that you are too scared to ask her out unless you have an almost guarantee that she says yes. Then start changing this limiting mindset. 6
normal person Posted October 1, 2017 Posted October 1, 2017 My point overall is if I asked her out now it would be weird I mean I want to make sure that I have a good idea if she's interested or not before I bother and we are familiar enough that it wont seem weird. If we keep talking I hope I can get a nudge in the right direction to make a move. I'll keep talking but I hope she gets the hint and gives me something I can work with. just need to feel like I have enough comfort with her that it wouldn't be weird and I have enough to go on that she might reciprocate. Asking now would be weird. It just would. Perhaps, it just feels too soon This is how I justified not asking a girl to a dance when I was 14 years old. Saying "I can't do it now because it would be weird" is something you should have abandoned years ago. How old are you? If you were a woman, who would you rather go out with? A confident guy who goes after what he wants with little to no hesitation, or a reluctant guy who doubts, second guesses himself, and needs you to give confirmation that you're interested in him first because he's literally too scared of it "being weird?" 6
Author Sdives Posted October 1, 2017 Author Posted October 1, 2017 These are all valid points . Maybe soon. I don't know if I'm sold just yet.
Author Sdives Posted October 1, 2017 Author Posted October 1, 2017 I'll report more this coming week. I mean its like were just starting to talk now. before talk was like about the weather and nonsense. The 2 weeks past I was pretty sure it was on. The latter half of last week didnt feel that way. If I was her or any woman I would have talked to whoever for a little bit to see if they are worth time even for a coffee etc.
smackie9 Posted October 1, 2017 Posted October 1, 2017 You are not a woman.....how do you know this is how we are? I'm telling you, you are wasting your time doing this. Like Cookiesandough said, more than likely she has already made up her mind a long time ago if she would go out with you or not. IMO that changes if she sees you lacking confidence because of you taking so long...strike when the iron is hot as they say.. 1
Author Sdives Posted October 1, 2017 Author Posted October 1, 2017 You are not a woman.....how do you know this is how we are? I'm telling you, you are wasting your time doing this. Like Cookiesandough said, more than likely she has already made up her mind a long time ago if she would go out with you or not. IMO that changes if she sees you lacking confidence because of you taking so long...strike when the iron is hot as they say.. I'll try to get to it soon.What else am I supposed to say?
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted October 1, 2017 Posted October 1, 2017 I'll report more this coming week. I mean its like were just starting to talk now. before talk was like about the weather and nonsense. The 2 weeks past I was pretty sure it was on. The latter half of last week didnt feel that way. If I was her or any woman I would have talked to whoever for a little bit to see if they are worth time even for a coffee etc. You can't possibly know this since you're not a woman . However, I am on your team I think. I would prefer to have a definite rapport with someone before they asked me on a date. But, you have no clue who else is chatting her up at the gym or elsewhere. Don't wait around too long because the guy who works out at 3PM every day may be just as into her as you are.....
Versacehottie Posted October 1, 2017 Posted October 1, 2017 This is how I justified not asking a girl to a dance when I was 14 years old. Saying "I can't do it now because it would be weird" is something you should have abandoned years ago. How old are you? If you were a woman, who would you rather go out with? A confident guy who goes after what he wants with little to no hesitation, or a reluctant guy who doubts, second guesses himself, and needs you to give confirmation that you're interested in him first because he's literally too scared of it "being weird?" Exactly! that is what I meant when I said the "quantity' of time you put in doesn't matter if I start to suspect you don't have the b*lls to ask me out. In that case, the more time you put in, it could equally be a deterrent since I would sense you are afraid and trying to gather courage. Have (or get!) confidence. 1
Author Sdives Posted October 1, 2017 Author Posted October 1, 2017 (edited) You can't possibly know this since you're not a woman . However, I am on your team I think. I would prefer to have a definite rapport with someone before they asked me on a date. But, you have no clue who else is chatting her up at the gym or elsewhere. Don't wait around too long because the guy who works out at 3PM every day may be just as into her as you are..... We've only had two small chats so far. Some joking around but thats it I mean that's not much to go on. This time last week I was pretty sure she was down but as of Last Tuesday and Friday I wasn't so sure. Here’s a random question so I’m talking with her the other day and another girl and another guy. Out of nowhere some guy walks in, she gestured to the other girl I guess to get her attention of his supposed appeal. He wasn’t an attractive dude. The other guy with us was like “ whatever” and “ you gotta be kidding me”. The other girl she gestured to had no reaction at all. Didn’t even acknowledge it. The whole thing was random, fast and weird. she was kinda moody today as well. It seemed deliberate and out of place. I thought what is trying to demonstrate she's on the market? If the guy was handsome it would made sense but he wasn't its like he was any random dude. Even 5 minutes later I couldn't remember what he looks like.They might not have either. it was overall weird Edited October 1, 2017 by Sdives
guest569 Posted October 2, 2017 Posted October 2, 2017 All the obsessive chit chat and analysis is a waste of time. You're clearly interested enough to ask her out and find out more about her on a date. If you're sure that it will be fine if she says no and you can still go to your gym then why not? But it is her job to talk and be polite so don't read too much into it.
Author Sdives Posted October 2, 2017 Author Posted October 2, 2017 All the obsessive chit chat and analysis is a waste of time. You're clearly interested enough to ask her out and find out more about her on a date. If you're sure that it will be fine if she says no and you can still go to your gym then why not? But it is her job to talk and be polite so don't read too much into it. I'll ask If I feel good about it but Im not there yet. I was initially just asking if she would catch on if I talked to her all the time. I talk all of them there in general
kendahke Posted October 2, 2017 Posted October 2, 2017 These are all valid points . Maybe soon. I don't know if I'm sold just yet. Meanwhile, a man with confidence has already stepped to her and asked her out and is closing the deal on taking it further. I can pretty much tell you that if she hasn't made any kind of statements to you about her interest, hasn't shown you any kind of gestures that indicate interest, then she's not interested. She's just being friendly because it's part of her job description. There are absolutely no guarantees anywhere in life and especially when it comes to people and their preferences. If that's what you need in order to ask someone out because you're so afraid of being told "no", then you'd be better served if you didn't date or you stuck to girls with low self esteem who don't mind playing games.
kendahke Posted October 2, 2017 Posted October 2, 2017 Here’s a random question so I’m talking with her the other day and another girl and another guy. Out of nowhere some guy walks in, she gestured to the other girl I guess to get her attention of his supposed appeal. He wasn’t an attractive dude. The other guy with us was like “ whatever” and “ you gotta be kidding me”. The other girl she gestured to had no reaction at all. Didn’t even acknowledge it. The whole thing was random, fast and weird. she was kinda moody today as well. It seemed deliberate and out of place. I thought what is trying to demonstrate she's on the market? If the guy was handsome it would made sense but he wasn't its like he was any random dude. Even 5 minutes later I couldn't remember what he looks like.They might not have either. it was overall weird What does "get her attention of his supposed appeal" even mean? What does "she was kinda moody today as well. It seemed deliberate and out of place. I thought what is trying to demonstrate she's on the market?" mean? This makes no sense.
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