Cheese016 Posted September 25, 2017 Posted September 25, 2017 So my exgirlfriend and I broke up a little over two months ago. She dumped me after saying she didn't know how she feels anymore and that we were drifting apart. The past month or so I've used NC to try to get her to second guess herself and come back or to move on completely. Recently she has reached out to my family friend from home (5 times in the last week). She would also send my friend messages via Snapchat if her "having fun" coincidentally after seeing a picture or video of me having a blast with some friends. Recently my friend called her out and asked what her deal it. My ex got very defensive saying we aren't getting back together and all that jazz. PS the only connection that my ex had to my friend was me and my friend did not answer until that night a few days ago. Basically I'm just wondering what is going on in my ex's mind because it's driving me crazy. All I can think of is that these are all mind games she is trying to put in play so I will contact her. Of course I would love to get back together after all we dated for over 2.5 years and had even talked about marriage, kids, etc. What do all of you think?
Buriall Posted September 25, 2017 Posted September 25, 2017 In a sense you're palying a game too you said "I've used NC to try to get her to second guess herself and come back or to move on completely" If you want to work things out do so if not let her know you are done and trying to move on. Than cut all forms of communication and continue having fun. Eitherway this does not sound like a healthy mature relationship. All these snapchats and videos of "look at me im having fun without you" are all games..Nonesense rubbish
d0nnivain Posted September 25, 2017 Posted September 25, 2017 Yes, she is playing games but so are you. NC is not about making her miss you so she comes back. That is manipulation. She said she doesn't know how she feels. That is code for "I don't love you anymore but I don't have enough of a spine to say that you I'm going to try to soften the blow by giving you false hope." I doubt she's truly changed her mind but she's probably lonely. It won't work but if you want to know for sure, reach out & tell her that you heard through the grape vine she's contacting your friends & family. Tell her you are open to talking about reconciliation if she calls you but if that is not what she wants you would appreciate it if she left everybody else out of this. Then wait. Understand she probably won't contact you & she'll be mad you did this but she might come around. If she doesn't call, leave her alone & never bother about what she is doing again.
Author Cheese016 Posted September 25, 2017 Author Posted September 25, 2017 I understand I didn't think of non-contact as a game. I thought it would be better for me to just not talk to her or see her anywhere and see what happens. Now that she's constantly reaching out I can't help but feel she's at her wits end and either her or I should talk to each other. It's not helping either of us
Author Cheese016 Posted September 25, 2017 Author Posted September 25, 2017 Recently I have been meeting new people and have been on a couple dates. I'm taking the proper steps to move forward but she is somehow trying to still be a part of my life even after she dumped me.
Been Posted September 25, 2017 Posted September 25, 2017 They only do that because they haven't found anyone suitable in their eyes to replace you completely yet.
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