Infern0121 Posted September 19, 2017 Posted September 19, 2017 (edited) A girl i knew for a while who i always had very very good chemistry with (insane levels of flirting always) We hooked up last year but at the time i was fresh off a break up and a little messed up so i didn't pursue it any further. This year we hooked up again but this time it was her who was fresh off a breakup, and i was ready to take it further. At first she was into it but quickly did a u-turn and tried to friendzone me (as she was still talking to her ex) and i said no thanks, and to message me if she was interested in dating only. She told me i was an ******* and she didn't want me in her life and stuff, I just said ok i'm sorry you feel that way but i'm not going to be friendzoned, sorry. A few weeks went by and she started to reply to my "snap stories" but she is being like sarcastic and snipey about it. For my part i'm not getting drawn in so if i do respond i just keep an even tone and don't react. Anyone got any insight what's going on here, she confuses me and nothings ever been straightforward with her from day one but i'm not fond of games and odd behaviour. thanks Edited September 19, 2017 by Infern0121
basil67 Posted September 19, 2017 Posted September 19, 2017 If you're not fond of games and snippy people, she's not the woman for you. Block her on social media. 3
coolheadal Posted September 19, 2017 Posted September 19, 2017 What I don't get OP is why in the world do you care so much about someone who's clearly not into you nor does she care about your feelings as something more than friendship. She told you she only wanted you as a friend! Your in denial and want more she not interested or more. So have no more contact with her and don't reply back. Do you really think for one moment you can have a woman like her in your life think again! Go find a woman who wants to be with you and wants more than just friendship too!
ExpatInItaly Posted September 19, 2017 Posted September 19, 2017 She's immature and wants you as her back-up. 1
Author Infern0121 Posted September 19, 2017 Author Posted September 19, 2017 What I don't get OP is why in the world do you care so much about someone who's clearly not into you nor does she care about your feelings as something more than friendship. She told you she only wanted you as a friend! Your in denial and want more she not interested or more. So have no more contact with her and don't reply back. Do you really think for one moment you can have a woman like her in your life think again! Go find a woman who wants to be with you and wants more than just friendship too! Would agree with this if we hadn't already had sex multiple times in the past and she wasn't still finding excuses to contact me. I haven't chased her at all. I do like her, think she's a cool chick but she's got a weird attitude when it comes to intimacy. I know when a girl isn't interested in you, they don't have sex with you multiple times and they don't keep making excuses to contact you, they do the opposite of all that.
coolheadal Posted September 19, 2017 Posted September 19, 2017 Would agree with this if we hadn't already had sex multiple times in the past and she wasn't still finding excuses to contact me. I haven't chased her at all. I do like her, think she's a cool chick but she's got a weird attitude when it comes to intimacy. I know when a girl isn't interested in you, they don't have sex with you multiple times and they don't keep making excuses to contact you, they do the opposite of all that. That's not true always she can do whatever she pleases unless you allow it. I still don't get why you continue to allow her to contact you still? Like you just don't want to let go of her. You give her a backdoor into your life. I suggest you close that door and go on with your life without her. In the long run you'll be sorry if you don't lock the door from her!
Author Infern0121 Posted September 19, 2017 Author Posted September 19, 2017 That's not true always she can do whatever she pleases unless you allow it. I still don't get why you continue to allow her to contact you still? Like you just don't want to let go of her. You give her a backdoor into your life. I suggest you close that door and go on with your life without her. In the long run you'll be sorry if you don't lock the door from her! Do you think it's healthy to cut people out of your life if they don't give you what you want when you want it? Personally i try to be a bit more mindful about such things. Just because a thing is one way now doesn't mean it always will be.
coolheadal Posted September 19, 2017 Posted September 19, 2017 Do you think it's healthy to cut people out of your life if they don't give you what you want when you want it? Personally i try to be a bit more mindful about such things. Just because a thing is one way now doesn't mean it always will be. I do the same thing too at times, but listen she's playing you, do not let her get away with that game. You have to take control you're going to get hurt. Man you just don't want to hurt trust me not good. I know your heart is with her but her heart is no where near where you are with her in your mind. I say this from experience. You love them but they really don't love you as much as you do for them. That's the hard part to this.. I have go get ready for work.. I'll check in when I get back.. Sorry.. I hope you get some of this meaning I trying to say.. She's trying to get under your skin is another way of saying this...
PegNosePete Posted September 19, 2017 Posted September 19, 2017 Do you think it's healthy to cut people out of your life if they don't give you what you want when you want it? I don't think it's good for your mental state and long-term happiness, to continue to have someone like this in your life. She is a game player. If you play with fire you're gonna get burned.
elaine567 Posted September 19, 2017 Posted September 19, 2017 Do you think it's healthy to cut people out of your life if they don't give you what you want when you want it? Ok but is that not exactly what you did to her. YOU rejected her first, then you hooked up again and had sex, but when things changed in her life she turned you down as her ex was back in the pic, she then wanted to "friend zone" you, but you then cut her completely out of your life as you did not want to be her friend, you wanted more. She now I guess doesn't like you very much, as it was obvious all you wanted was sex from her. 1
Author Infern0121 Posted September 19, 2017 Author Posted September 19, 2017 (edited) Ok but is that not exactly what you did to her. YOU rejected her first, then you hooked up again and had sex, but when things changed in her life she turned you down as her ex was back in the pic, she then wanted to "friend zone" you, but you then cut her completely out of your life as you did not want to be her friend, you wanted more. She now I guess doesn't like you very much, as it was obvious all you wanted was sex from her. I was honest about what i wanted from the first night we met up again, we had sex and i told her i made a mistake last year, she said she did too (getting with her ex instead of waiting until i was ready for a commitment). We had a sexual relationship in the past, it didn't progress by my choice, this time I was in a position where i could, and wanted to. She changed her mind and said no as she was still dealing with her ex, so I told her, i'm looking for a physical relationship and to date, i'm not going to change my mind on that and i don't see a platonic friendship working right now as I was starting to become emotionally invested. I didn't cut her out of my life, she's welcome to message me and talk to me, I won't ignore her, i'm a reasonable person. But i'm not going to sit in friendzone, devaluing myself in her eyes, and go on coffee dates with her so she can complain to me that her toxic relationship still isn't working. We have chemistry, we have potential as a couple but she's trying to give CPR to a relationship that was D.O.A a year ago for some reason. I simply want to know why she's sending me sarcastic, bratty messages. Edited September 19, 2017 by Infern0121
PegNosePete Posted September 19, 2017 Posted September 19, 2017 I simply want to know why she's sending me sarcastic, bratty messages. Because she is a sarcastic brat. 2
elaine567 Posted September 19, 2017 Posted September 19, 2017 Why don't you just block her from everything?
stillafool Posted September 19, 2017 Posted September 19, 2017 Block her. Maybe then she will get the message.
Art_Critic Posted September 19, 2017 Posted September 19, 2017 oh.. you are just trying to turn this into a nail her one more time deal... If you weren't she would have already been blocked, she has become your backup. Time to block and delete as it seems you both don't really like each other.
stillafool Posted October 11, 2017 Posted October 11, 2017 Do you think it's healthy to cut people out of your life if they don't give you what you want when you want it? Personally i try to be a bit more mindful about such things. Just because a thing is one way now doesn't mean it always will be. It's perfectly healthy to cut game players, liars and nasty people out of your life. Block her so you don't have to put up with her again.
TheFinalWord Posted October 11, 2017 Posted October 11, 2017 A girl i knew for a while who i always had very very good chemistry with (insane levels of flirting always) We hooked up last year but at the time i was fresh off a break up and a little messed up so i didn't pursue it any further. This year we hooked up again but this time it was her who was fresh off a breakup, and i was ready to take it further. At first she was into it but quickly did a u-turn and tried to friendzone me (as she was still talking to her ex) and i said no thanks, and to message me if she was interested in dating only. She told me i was an ******* and she didn't want me in her life and stuff, I just said ok i'm sorry you feel that way but i'm not going to be friendzoned, sorry. A few weeks went by and she started to reply to my "snap stories" but she is being like sarcastic and snipey about it. For my part i'm not getting drawn in so if i do respond i just keep an even tone and don't react. Anyone got any insight what's going on here, she confuses me and nothings ever been straightforward with her from day one but i'm not fond of games and odd behaviour. thanks This is one of those situations where I would say block her and stop interacting with her, even if you are doing so indirectly by allowing her to access and comment on your posts. The timing was never right, this will never amount to a healthy romantic relationship, and the two of you can't just be friends. Allowing someone to access your social media is giving them at least some access to your life. So why do you want to let her into your life? (something to ask yourself, not something you have to reply to here).
Omei Posted October 12, 2017 Posted October 12, 2017 Take it as a good insight to what being in a relationship with her would be like.
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