DanIsaac Posted September 18, 2017 Posted September 18, 2017 Hey everybody. Well here we go. Sorry for the long post but I'm not sure what I should do. I'm 40 years old dating a 28-year-old and it's my first relationship in a very long time. We've been together almost 6 months but the last two months have been rough. Since I started dating her I've been to a therapist and I'm constantly overthinking every detail of our relationship. I knew it would happen based on that being in a relationship for so much of my 30s. We started off great, the honeymoon period you would call it. Making time for each other talking texting FaceTimeing. Scheduling was the big problem at first but we seemed to make it work. I'm needy I know it. I put a lot of stress on the relationship in the beginning because we never really met each other's friends and I didn't know how to feel about that. We made all sorts of plans for dating, creating a Notes list of things we wanted to do with each other but honestly I felt we would never get any of them. We haven't seen each other in three weeks. The first week she was on vacation in Maine with her friends. Upon returning she learned that her aunt was dying and she needed to go to Baltimore to be with her. The aunt eventually died and I'm trying to be supportive but this is so new for me. Communication has been mostly texting. She's a millennial and that's how she does it. She's been able to text me the most devastating news and trauma that she's dealing with it all I can do is say that I'm there for her but she never acknowledges me reaching out and I get it. I offered to pick her up at the airport when she got home to see a familar face. I left her a voicemail this morning, just checking in and she responded with a text saying she was already home and back at work. I feel sad that she wasn't able to tell me that she was coming back and that maybe she needed some space but again I get it. There's more and I can't fit it all in this post. Thoughts?
Gaeta Posted September 18, 2017 Posted September 18, 2017 DanIsaac: I am sorry but you won't see her again. She does not want to continue with the relationship and she is too coward to tell you. Stop contacting her and move on with your life. You'd also be much better dating someone your age. 1
smackie9 Posted September 18, 2017 Posted September 18, 2017 So why have the last two months been rough? Is there tension in the relationship? If so it wouldn't surprise me that she has had time to reflect, and may or may not have made a decision about continuing. maybe after her aunt died, she realized she needs to do better things with her life than date a nervous nelly that puts pressure on a relationship.
RecentChange Posted September 18, 2017 Posted September 18, 2017 I suppose every one grieves differently..... But I am going to agree with others, she isn't that into you. I lost a dear loved one last week, and honestly welcomed any support I could get, and responded with how much it meant to me that they cared, that their support was so dearly appreciated. For whatever reason, she doesn't turn to you when she needs support - and to me, a good relationship means being vulnerable to each other, supporting each other
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