Thinking of her when I'm out

[Shs101]

Short term relationship caused a ton of post break up pain and thoughts.....2 weeks post break up and over a week no contact...I feel I'm getting better slowly day by day. I'm in early/mid 20s and this weekend I went for the first time since break up and actually felt awful...very surprised. I think it's because I see other couples and other woman and it's not what I'm used to. Anyone feel this before? Everyone says go out with friends but I actually feel more lonely when I do. Need some uplifting. The relationship ended very bad absolute no chance of reconcile and I don't mind it, I miss her yeah but she did bad things. Thoughts on going out and actually having fun again? Or is time

[greenicon]

Short term relationship caused a ton of post break up pain and thoughts.....2 weeks post break up and over a week no contact...I feel I'm getting better slowly day by day. I'm in early/mid 20s and this weekend I went for the first time since break up and actually felt awful...very surprised. I think it's because I see other couples and other woman and it's not what I'm used to. Anyone feel this before? Everyone says go out with friends but I actually feel more lonely when I do. Need some uplifting. The relationship ended very bad absolute no chance of reconcile and I don't mind it, I miss her yeah but she did bad things. Thoughts on going out and actually having fun again? Or is time

 

Totally understand you - 100%. This happened to me very recently. Short term relationship - finished abruptly when everything was still very much on the upwards curve.

I went out with a friend last week - about 2 weeks post break up and I felt exactly the same as you did, Seeing couples everywhere was painful. He took me to the same 2 bars we had our first date on and that really did for me. It was the best first date I had ever had.

I think time is the healer to everything in these situations - It's the only rational way. You will go out again in time and not feel the same pains, it does take time and only you will know when you are ok with it - but you will get there..

[maxi105]

give yourself time, it doesn't sound as though you are ready to go out and face the world yet.

 

just let your emotions direct you to how things go and how you feel. it all sounds very raw, so don't pressure yourself even more trying to feel ok if you don't.

 

there is no time limit, everyone is different in their healing and grieving provesses.

 

time will see you back to your old self, you will know when you are ready, and even if you try and it brings you down, then you can always go home, friends will always be there if they are good mates.

 

maybe talk to family if you can, spend some time alone with a few of your favourite dvd's etc.

 

you'll meet another when the time is right, but love is painful!!! but its part of hopefully forming stronger relatiosnhips in the future and meeting the right one for you.

 

however much you loved this girl, it is sad, but she wasn't really the right one for you (may be she was but the time or things that happened were not good for you).

 

if it is meant to be you paths will cross again and the timing and love between you can repair, if not then you might have a good friend in time.

 

i wish you all the luck here and take care of your self. its not a bad reflection of you, it just didn't work out for you this time.

VERY BEST WISHES, take time out for yourself for the mean time, i think going out with friends might bring too many memories back and you will keep seeing couples or hearing songs that she likes or seeing girls that remind you of her etc.

 

you'll be ok, i promise! maxi:eek:

[MarvelFan1]

You're not alone buddy.

 

After my break up with my ex of 14 months, I hated weekends. Hated them. That was always our time together to go out, have fun, stay in and snuggle with a film etc, and now I had to adjust to being on my own with no one. Even when I was out with friends, at the cinema or pub, I would always think of her and fell lonely and miserable, even in a room full of friends.

 

Now I am starting to enjoy weekends again after 4 months, and even though I still think of her, I don't get upset, because I've slowly adjusted. Now I fill my weekends with going around a friends for a film night, organising a game night of board games or Xbox with mates or just pop out to see a band.

 

Occupy your time bud, and in time, you will be okay, trust me.

 

As for missing your ex, I miss my ex sometimes and she was bad for me, but it's better to be single living your life free and on your terms, not being treated badly, than being with someone who makes you miserable for the sake of company.