Should I give him another chance?

[Katz123]

I went out with this guy twice, but it took so long for us to get to a second date because he kept saying he was having all these issues. After the second date we planned to go out again but then he had car issues then I didn't hear from him for like a week or so. Should I go out with him again?

[morrowrd]

Why not? Do you like him? What does it hurt to go out, hang out and talk. It's possible he is having problems - although "problems" are many times excuses to be unavailable while people are dating others. So is the way of the <new> dating world.

 

Don't sleep with him or do anything physical that could confuse your emotions. Be friends, go out and talk, have fun. Even if it's once a month. Who cares...you can always use more friends. If things start to warm up, then is the time to clean up all the unknowns.

[smackie9]

No. Unreliable is unreliable. First impressions count. If he is of integrity, he would have been able to think on his feet to solve any issue...he lets issues dictate his life....this fails.

[Katz123]

And I went out with this other guy one time over a month ago, he's texted me a few times but hasn't asked to go out again until today. Is this okay?

[act00]

My experience is that this is a lost cause. Sure, go out with him again, why not, and see what happens...you never know if life just created barriers and you'll end up living happily ever after, but don't...don't...get invested. The pattern so far is not good. I had a ghoster. Just getting that first date was difficult. Our schedules are opposite and time very limited, but we really hit it off when it finally happened, went out a few times, and then he had some life drama and dropped off the planet. A couple months later, he contacted me. A date was not forthcoming over a few weeks, and the one time we had a half-arsed solid plan on the day, there was no solid place or time...and he fell asleep. I broke it off. A few months later he's texting again. Still no date is forthcoming, but he did call once for a last-minute date that was way too late. Nope. Nine months go by...then 10...I told him not to contact me again until he has the time to invest. By now I was just not fully invested, but the constant jumps into my life started to hurt more, because I knew nothing was going to happen. I gave too many chances for too long. It won't kill you to try, and maybe things have improved or maybe he'll continue this pattern...then you call it quits for good.

 

I don't have an issue with putting in a try. I think for your own peace of mind, it's better to walk away with an "I tried" instead of a "what if." It's up to you, but if this pattern of disappearing and reappearing is constant, he's evasive, too busy, etc., then move on.

[smackie9]

And I went out with this other guy one time over a month ago, he's texted me a few times but hasn't asked to go out again until today. Is this okay?

His other prospects didn't pan out.....you want to be second or third choice?

 

I myself used to do the what if and went out...always a waste of time.

[Zahara]

I went out with this guy twice, but it took so long for us to get to a second date because he kept saying he was having all these issues. After the second date we planned to go out again but then he had car issues then I didn't hear from him for like a week or so. Should I go out with him again?

 

So, to get to the second date, he had all kinds of issues. Then to get to the third date, he had issues with his car. And now you haven't heard from him for a week.

 

He is not very interested. He'll likely swing around when he has no prospects. Don't waste your time.

[Miss Spider]

I went out with this guy twice, but it took so long for us to get to a second date because he kept saying he was having all these issues. After the second date we planned to go out again but then he had car issues then I didn't hear from him for like a week or so. Should I go out with him again?

 

 

 

 

I met this guy back in June. I asked him out and he told me he was busy with work and turned me down for a first date/meet. I immediately blocked/deleted lol. The only reason we got back in touch again was just because I was bored and swiped him again on Tinder months later. We got back in touch and 3 dates later we are BF/GF.

 

 

I guess the moral of the story is to be open and don't burn any bridges. I'm not saying accept blow offs/flakiness that inconveniences you, but if you like him and enjoy being with him and he asks you on a date, go for it. I strongly suggest keeping your options open, though. That makes this so much easier because you're not waiting around for the one guy to contact you. It's been my experience that when they start to really like you, they plan that date and make it happen. Good luck!!!

[No_Go]

His other prospects didn't pan out.....you want to be second or third choice?

 

I myself used to do the what if and went out...always a waste of time.

 

Possibly, but what's wrong with that? He tried with someone - it turned different than what he thought, he went back to OP. It is just life. I feel like people use OLD to feed their egos or try to boost their confidence (oh, I MUST be his/her 'first' choice. WTH??)

[Miss Spider]

I met this guy back in June. I asked him out and he told me he was busy with work and turned me down for a first date/meet. I immediately blocked/deleted lol. The only reason we got back in touch again was just because I was bored and swiped him again on Tinder months later. We got back in touch and 3 dates later we are BF/GF.

 

 

I guess the moral of the story is to be open and don't burn any bridges. I'm not saying accept blow offs/flakiness that inconveniences you, but if you like him and enjoy being with him and he asks you on a date, go for it. I strongly suggest keeping your options open, though. That makes this so much easier because you're not waiting around for the one guy to contact you. It's been my experience that when they start to really like you, they plan that date and make it happen. Good luck!!!

 

I want to expand on what I said. We were just Internet strangers when he said he was "busy" that week and suggested the following:, I feel a bit differently about being turned down for a date or having a date postponed AFTER meeting. With OLD and first meets, people can be a bit flaky for several reasons, but after they meet you they should stop being flaky or HARD next them

[Cobra_X]

I went out with this guy twice, but it took so long for us to get to a second date because he kept saying he was having all these issues. After the second date we planned to go out again but then he had car issues then I didn't hear from him for like a week or so. Should I go out with him again?

 

If he met you already and doesn't seem excited to see you again...

 

I would say it's likely that his interest is low. You can try to get his interest level up... or move on.