a902307 Posted September 12, 2017 Posted September 12, 2017 (edited) I recently broke up with my boyfriend a week ago. We had a 3 year relationship. I found out last year that he began cheating on me within 6 months of dating. How did I found out? Well her brother messaged me letting me know he was cheating on me and she got pregnant and was being pressured to get an abortion. I showed him the message they sent me on Instagram and he denied it all and said someone was trying to mess with me. I had doubts for a couple of weeks until she had liked one my pictures on Instagram. I did not recognize this person so I looked into her IG gallery and I saw pictures of her in his place and all the restaurants we went to, they went to and that was my proof to confront him. Back story on how they met, well he had met this girl at his new job and his reason for cheating was that she gave him attention he never felt before and she was okay knowing that he had a girlfriend and accepted the side chick position. Assuming she had hopes that he would leave me for her at some point she was okay with it. When he finally confessed he was sorry and told me she didn’t mean anything to him. He’s relieved she no longer has the baby because he did not want a kid and she was in school I think studying paramedic. Regardless he told he did not want the baby because he wouldn’t be able to be with me. Then I get a second message from another family member on her side letting me know that he kept telling her he was going leave me and she was in love with him and he was helping her out with her rent. And pretty much calling me garbage etc. to be mean to me. I broke up with him and he was weeping, asking me to forgive him. A few days later I had to know why he did it to get some clarification, I wanted more answers. Eventually, I gave him a second chance because he promised it wouldn’t do it again and he wanted us, I was the person he wanted to marry, have a family etc. We continued the relationship, even though they worked at the same station he had stopped talking to her for awhile. We had our fights/arguments, it was hard because she would be stalking my Instagram and write these messages to me on her bio or post pictures of places nearby his place. I always questioned him what he was doing, but he would call me to make me feel better or send me snaps to show me what he was doing. Time went by, we went on vacation in May. In July, we had a argument because I wanted him to place a surveillance camera, it was his idea anyways but when he mentioned it the first time I did not want to because I wasn’t that person to be checking up on him 24/7. I wanted to try again to trust him. I got upset because it seemed like he changed his mind about it. Next day, he breaks up with me, saying things are not working out, we are not on the same page for future. I was so confused because we would talk about out future. I went over to this place a day later to see if he calmed down, maybe he was just mad, only to see he went back to her and she spent the night. We broke up again. He calls me a couple days later and we had a conversation why he broke up with me. All the issues he mentioned we decided to fix on because they were all fixable and he said he was sorry, he wants to be with me, he loves me. The other girl still doesn’t mean anything to him, he will never be serious with. Next day, he lets her know that he went back to me and he doesn’t want to be with her. We continue our relationship and I move into his place for a bit. I thought things were going good, we cooked for one another, I came home to him. I spent time with his family, got closer to them (I knew his family before I even met him because I was good friends with his cousin) So they liked me very much. A week of me moving in, she messaged me on Facebook, insulting me and letting me know he was still cheating on me after I gave him a second chance. That he looked for her and kept telling her he was unhappy etc. and to forgive him and he was going to leave me. Again she accepted the side chick position. After I read this message and showed it to him, he said we are moving forward, don’t listen to her etc. One day she breaks into his apartment and plants her dirty underwear on my pjs. He had to change his locks and place a security camera. I was so angry that time, but he wasn’t lying to me, she really did break in. I kept going it with him, still with hopes. We talked again about our future, kept telling me was happy. Then on Labor Day weekend, I asked him what was wrong, he looked upset. And he broke down in tears was being honest and told me he misses her and he regrets that night we made up. He should’ve brought her to family gathering we went to instead of me. Things would’ve been different. I packed my things and left. He messages me to make sure I’m okay a few days later and tells me know let him know if I need help with anything. I stopped talking to him. In the end, he chose her over me. He left me to be with her. And now I’m here questioning what does this person have I don’t. She’s not a good person, she’s humiliated me and insulted me. Not that looks matter, but she isn’t that pretty. Why would he do that to me. I’m confused, feel rejected, I lost to someone so beneath me. I loved his so much, gave him everything, I was there for him, tried to make him a better person, he said I did. I don’t understand. I need some guidance on this…It's hurting me so much Edited September 12, 2017 by a902307
darkmoon Posted September 12, 2017 Posted September 12, 2017 (edited) He will end up with a third, fourth etc girl. Men do not settle down, not once and for all, not until they are more mature than him. Date (not screw!) a few guys at a time, to avoid being carried away by focusing on one guy. Early days, I know, but plan some outfits and put some music on. Edited September 12, 2017 by darkmoon
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