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how to respond to this text

wiseman6716

By wiseman6716
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wiseman6716 Member

wiseman6716

Posted
Posted

Been out with this girl couple times, asked her out again and she texted she really wants to go but has a family obligation. (went into detail about it)

 

My response was going to be .

 

Your killin me over here. Timing sucked on that one but I understand. Ill let ya make it up to me some other time. Hope everything goes well with them.

 

What do you think trying to keep it relaxed and not so serious.

 

THanks

MidwestUSA Established Member

MidwestUSA

Posted
Posted
Been out with this girl couple times, asked her out again and she texted she really wants to go but has a family obligation. (went into detail about it)

 

My response was going to be .

 

Your killin me over here. Timing sucked on that one but I understand. Ill let ya make it up to me some other time. Hope everything goes well with them.

 

What do you think trying to keep it relaxed and not so serious.

 

THanks

 

 

That's not relaxed, the undertone 'you can make it up to me' implies your disappointment.

 

If you like her, why not be polite? She went into detail because she's sharing a part of her life with you. Tell her you hope she has a good time, and ask when she would be available to do what you had planned.

 

Is communication really this difficult nowadays?

  • Like 10
d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

Posted
Posted

You can be disappointed & you can say so. Wish her well & contact her again in a few days.

  • Like 1
smackie9 Established Member

smackie9

Posted
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Be cute and cheeky with : "Aww really?? *disappointment*, that's OK, I look forward to seeing you soon" :)

  • Like 7
coolheadal Established Member

coolheadal

Posted
Posted
Been out with this girl couple times, asked her out again and she texted she really wants to go but has a family obligation. (went into detail about it)

 

My response was going to be .

 

Your killin me over here. Timing sucked on that one but I understand. Ill let ya make it up to me some other time. Hope everything goes well with them.

 

What do you think trying to keep it relaxed and not so serious.

 

THanks

 

Okay contact me when you can, bye take care...

  • Like 5
olivetree Established Member

olivetree

Posted
Posted

Express a little disappointment in a cute way and tell her to have a good time.

 

I'd skip out on the "ya" and "you can make it up to me" in future communication.

"Ya" is too casual and "you can make it up to me" leaves the feeling of being obligated/indebted to someone when she has done nothing other than already have plans... counters attraction.

  • Like 6
CautiouslyOptimistic Established Member

CautiouslyOptimistic

Posted
Posted
Express a little disappointment in a cute way and tell her to have a good time.

 

I'd skip out on the "ya" and "you can make it up to me" in future communication.

"Ya" is too casual and "you can make it up to me" leaves the feeling of being obligated/indebted to someone when she has done nothing other than already have plans... counters attraction.

 

I agree. I think a simple, "OK, rain check then! :) " would suffice. "you're killing me" and "you can make it up to me" is a off-putting.

  • Like 7
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wiseman6716 Member

wiseman6716

Posted
  • Author
Posted

Well I went with:

 

Damn. Timing sucked on that one but I understand. I'll let ya make it up to me some other time lol. Hope everything goes well with them.

 

We've known each other awhile and its kind of our humor and the way we took. If I would have went with something like Looked forward to going with you or look forward to seeing you soon, it wouldnt of been me. I think adding the lol showed I was disappointed but still kept it in a casual matter and not so serious.

 

She responded right away complaining why her obligation was scheduled for that night.

kendahke Established Member

kendahke

Posted
Posted

 

She responded right away complaining why her obligation was scheduled for that night.

 

Doesn't mean she's going to follow up, tho...

stillafool Established Member

stillafool

Posted
Posted

Or, "Okay. Have a good time."

amaysngrace Established Member

amaysngrace

Posted
Posted

Well there's two minutes of my life I'll never get back

  • Like 8
coolheadal Established Member

coolheadal

Posted
Posted
Well I went with:

 

Damn. Timing sucked on that one but I understand. I'll let ya make it up to me some other time lol. Hope everything goes well with them.

 

We've known each other awhile and its kind of our humor and the way we took. If I would have went with something like Looked forward to going with you or look forward to seeing you soon, it wouldnt of been me. I think adding the lol showed I was disappointed but still kept it in a casual matter and not so serious.

 

She responded right away complaining why her obligation was scheduled for that night.

 

You say to that statement

 

Well when you can find the time to reach out to me, just let me know? Otherwise my schedule seems full as well too. Take care bye

 

You have to ump your game as well, otherwise she'll walk all over you with this one. Excuse after excuses.

 

Do what you like but don't make it sound needy or weird...

LovelyRose Established Member

LovelyRose

Posted
Posted (edited)
You say to that statement

 

Well when you can find the time to reach out to me, just let me know? Otherwise my schedule seems full as well too. Take care bye

 

You have to ump your game as well, otherwise she'll walk all over you with this one. Excuse after excuses.

 

Do what you like but don't make it sound needy or weird...

 

 

 

Really? Do we even know the real story here? We don't even know why she couldn't go with the OP and how many times she has done this. OP said she has family obligation.

 

Is this how crazy the dating world is now where everything has to be a game and everything translates to being needy, pushy, too much and walking all over someone? How sad.

 

And for the OP, why even ask for advice on how to respond to her if you have known her for a while. That's a bad sign on your end that even knowing her a while and yet you're still unsure on how to respond to her and had to post first on here. Then none of the advice you even followed, lol.

Edited by LovelyRose
  • Like 3
The Urbanyst Established Member

The Urbanyst

Posted
Posted

When this happens I just say "cool" then I make plans with one of the other girls I'm dating lol.

Hbroken Established Member

Hbroken

Posted
Posted
Been out with this girl couple times, asked her out again and she texted she really wants to go but has a family obligation. (went into detail about it)

 

My response was going to be .

 

Your killin me over here. Timing sucked on that one but I understand. Ill let ya make it up to me some other time. Hope everything goes well with them.

 

What do you think trying to keep it relaxed and not so serious.

 

THanks

 

No probs. Family should always come first. best wishes

  • Like 1
kendahke Established Member

kendahke

Posted
Posted
Is this how crazy the dating world is now where everything has to be a game and everything translates to being needy, pushy, too much and walking all over someone? How sad. .

 

Yep.

 

It's the not well adjusted children playing "I'm going to punish you" games.

Pumpkin008 Member

Pumpkin008

Posted
Posted (edited)

Ugh. I used to have an employee that said "you're killing me" when I gave him work. I had to point out that I was not actually killing him in the process, but paying him to do work. Drove me batty.

 

 

It is too late now but I also would have left out the "you can make it up to me" part. I would HATE when boys said that to me. Note: I said "boys" and not "men".

 

 

One knows better than the other.

Edited by Pumpkin008
grammar
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wiseman6716 Member

wiseman6716

Posted
  • Author
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After sending the text. I read it and have to agree. I should have simply replaced it with I looked forward to going with you. I simply overthought it out and was trying to not come across so serious. Hopefully it wasn't a game changer

coolheadal Established Member

coolheadal

Posted
Posted
Really? Do we even know the real story here? We don't even know why she couldn't go with the OP and how many times she has done this. OP said she has family obligation.

 

Is this how crazy the dating world is now where everything has to be a game and everything translates to being needy, pushy, too much and walking all over someone? How sad.

 

And for the OP, why even ask for advice on how to respond to her if you have known her for a while. That's a bad sign on your end that even knowing her a while and yet you're still unsure on how to respond to her and had to post first on here. Then none of the advice you even followed, lol.

 

I say are you very sure to say really about this, come on now.. Push her or now she's coming up with excuses. Why should a man wait for a woman to decide either she going to do it or not. Exit out softly or push her to give him the answer he wants to hear right now!

todreaminblue Established Member

todreaminblue

Posted
Posted

you have known each other a while so trust your own instincts in the future.......which you did this time..and obviously it worked...best wishes...deb

  • Like 1
CoolJoe Established Member

CoolJoe

Posted
Posted
Is this how crazy the dating world is now where everything has to be a game and everything translates to being needy, pushy, too much and walking all over someone? How sad.

 

And for the OP, why even ask for advice on how to respond to her if you have known her for a while. That's a bad sign on your end that even knowing her a while and yet you're still unsure on how to respond to her and had to post first on here. Then none of the advice you even followed, lol.

 

LOL deja vu! You wrote the same thing to another poster in one of my threads and once again, I have to agree with you.

 

I can't stand this petty gamesmanship and manipulative scheming. Just be real, respectful and loving. The world and relationships would be so much healthier if people had more of that mentality.

  • Like 3
LovelyRose Established Member

LovelyRose

Posted
Posted
LOL deja vu! You wrote the same thing to another poster in one of my threads and once again, I have to agree with you.

 

I can't stand this petty gamesmanship and manipulative scheming. Just be real, respectful and loving. The world and relationships would be so much healthier if people had more of that mentality.

 

 

I'm just blown away. Anyway, I'm going to keep the rest of my thoughts to myself for now, lol.

LovelyRose Established Member

LovelyRose

Posted
Posted
I say are you very sure to say really about this, come on now.. Push her or now she's coming up with excuses. Why should a man wait for a woman to decide either she going to do it or not. Exit out softly or push her to give him the answer he wants to hear right now!

 

 

 

You lost me here, lol. But ok :)

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