barbossa Posted September 11, 2017 Posted September 11, 2017 Girl 1 age: 19 (1) I met her at the gym we spoke a few times albeit briefly because i wanted to be polite and not take up her time at the gym. 3rd or fourth time we spoke I asked her if I can add her on FB, she said yes, I asked her what her FB name was and what picture she had as her profile picture. I added her that night. (2) She has multiple jobs to make money and run's her own side business and still parties hard. When I met her she told me about the side business she has. and I emailed her business email and told her how amazing I thought her entrepreneurial side was and that she would surely become more successful. ( I was genuinely impressed with no hidden intentions) (3) the next time the i saw her i told her I had emailed her and expressed how awesome it was to see what she was doing, especially given her young age (4) The second time we spoke she told she was moving away at end of summer to chase her business dreams. (5) I once by chance met her outside when she was working her job Good interaction I introduced her to my brother. I asked her if she wanted to be introduced and she walked with me to meet him ( Polite and well mannered) (6) all our interactions have always been pleasant, she is always bubbly and smiles when she sees me ( she is generally bubbly and smiles a lot) (7) before I knew she set to depart i emailed her personal email and wished her success for her future. (8) She never responded to my email and after 4 months had not accepted my FB request but had added 50 other people. (9) To be fair my FB name under a false name ( real picture but it may be hard to tell it's me given my name, Males have also not added me given difficulty to know its me as later explained to me Girl 2 age 21 met beginning of August 2017 (1) I met her at my local Starbucks, I made small talk with her since we kept seeing each other, she was back home from school during summer. (2) we saw each other 3 times after this and always had brief and pleasent small talks and i made her laugh twice by telling a joke. (3) I asked her when she was planning to go back to school, she told me the date. (4) I planned to ask her out before she left but we did not see each other again. (5) A few days later randomly scrolling through different social media from my friends profile to stranger to stranger i saw the starbucks girl in a picture that she had recently won some award (6) her social media business inquiries email was listed so i emailed her: told her who I was, how i got her email, and how we knew each other and congratulated her on her recent award. 2 weeks later no response Question: A) Maybe they don't really read their emails? especially since we formally never exchanged emails? B) They were never really interested in me, but they were just being polite during our interactions and purposefully ignored my communications? C) they are very young, fairly hot and get swamped with Social media and texts messages and don't prioritize responding to a guy they barely know? I don't respond to all work emails i get (D) the only social media I have and on rare occasion i use is Facebook, and when i add a picture and people comment i also don't reply or like each and everyone. E) I also have a "side business" still in its infancy so i hardly check that email and haven't seen any emails from anyone either. F) Why i never ask them out? Or ask for their phone number? , the truth was I wanted to feel them out to see if there was actual interest, I am trying to be less shallow and not date someone simply on appearance. both of these girls are my type physically but i didn't know them enough, or i wasn't brave enough to ask them out **formatted this style to aid in ease of reading**
d0nnivain Posted September 11, 2017 Posted September 11, 2017 If you have a deceptive FB -- your picture / not your name, all this woman knows of you is that you lie to the world. Yet you want her to trust you enough to date you? Sorry. She has no foundation. Second girl it was just a random encounter. 1
smackie9 Posted September 11, 2017 Posted September 11, 2017 You are doing it wrong. If you find someone attractive, YOU show your interest and ask them out. YOU DO NOT "feel" them out. That is what cowards do. Women are more receptive a guy with confidence, that will go ballz in and just ask them out. Your chances will increase if you drop the "See if they might be interested". If it's not working stop doing it. 2
Author barbossa Posted September 11, 2017 Author Posted September 11, 2017 You are doing it wrong. If you find someone attractive, YOU show your interest and ask them out. YOU DO NOT "feel" them out. That is what cowards do. Women are more receptive a guy with confidence, that will go ballz in and just ask them out. Your chances will increase if you drop the "See if they might be interested". If it's not working stop doing it. You are right, it was cowardly of me not to ask them out. Generally, i ask out a girl the first time i speak with her, but I suppose I was not confident enough to do so in this case.
Erik30 Posted September 11, 2017 Posted September 11, 2017 You should ask girls out in person, or call/text if you don't see them often. Also, sending an email might be too formal. You should only do that if you have no other way of contacting them. (Though girl 1 probably wasn't interested anyway)
joseb Posted September 11, 2017 Posted September 11, 2017 If you have a deceptive FB -- your picture / not your name, all this woman knows of you is that you lie to the world. It's actually becoming pretty common not to have your full real name on Facebook. For similar reasons that people don't have their full names on here. Avoids a lot of stalking and information gathering from people. Less of an issue if you rarely share your fb details with people you just met I guess. Anyway. OP needs to ask girls for their number if he wants to date them.
coolheadal Posted September 11, 2017 Posted September 11, 2017 Girl 1 age: 19 (1) I met her at the gym we spoke a few times albeit briefly because i wanted to be polite and not take up her time at the gym. 3rd or fourth time we spoke I asked her if I can add her on FB, she said yes, I asked her what her FB name was and what picture she had as her profile picture. I added her that night. (2) She has multiple jobs to make money and run's her own side business and still parties hard. When I met her she told me about the side business she has. and I emailed her business email and told her how amazing I thought her entrepreneurial side was and that she would surely become more successful. ( I was genuinely impressed with no hidden intentions) (3) the next time the i saw her i told her I had emailed her and expressed how awesome it was to see what she was doing, especially given her young age (4) The second time we spoke she told she was moving away at end of summer to chase her business dreams. (5) I once by chance met her outside when she was working her job Good interaction I introduced her to my brother. I asked her if she wanted to be introduced and she walked with me to meet him ( Polite and well mannered) (6) all our interactions have always been pleasant, she is always bubbly and smiles when she sees me ( she is generally bubbly and smiles a lot) (7) before I knew she set to depart i emailed her personal email and wished her success for her future. (8) She never responded to my email and after 4 months had not accepted my FB request but had added 50 other people. (9) To be fair my FB name under a false name ( real picture but it may be hard to tell it's me given my name, Males have also not added me given difficulty to know its me as later explained to me Girl 2 age 21 met beginning of August 2017 (1) I met her at my local Starbucks, I made small talk with her since we kept seeing each other, she was back home from school during summer. (2) we saw each other 3 times after this and always had brief and pleasent small talks and i made her laugh twice by telling a joke. (3) I asked her when she was planning to go back to school, she told me the date. (4) I planned to ask her out before she left but we did not see each other again. (5) A few days later randomly scrolling through different social media from my friends profile to stranger to stranger i saw the starbucks girl in a picture that she had recently won some award (6) her social media business inquiries email was listed so i emailed her: told her who I was, how i got her email, and how we knew each other and congratulated her on her recent award. 2 weeks later no response Question: A) Maybe they don't really read their emails? especially since we formally never exchanged emails? B) They were never really interested in me, but they were just being polite during our interactions and purposefully ignored my communications? C) they are very young, fairly hot and get swamped with Social media and texts messages and don't prioritize responding to a guy they barely know? I don't respond to all work emails i get (D) the only social media I have and on rare occasion i use is Facebook, and when i add a picture and people comment i also don't reply or like each and everyone. E) I also have a "side business" still in its infancy so i hardly check that email and haven't seen any emails from anyone either. F) Why i never ask them out? Or ask for their phone number? , the truth was I wanted to feel them out to see if there was actual interest, I am trying to be less shallow and not date someone simply on appearance. both of these girls are my type physically but i didn't know them enough, or i wasn't brave enough to ask them out **formatted this style to aid in ease of reading** Sounds like your just doing research on this and not really interested in getting to know them for any long term relationship. These women are young adults they do not know much and are in learning stages. One has goals the other just random. Do you want to date these type of women really. You never asked them out so not much effort on your part. What's your goal really here. Just to chat and get to know them and add them to FB that's all you want? Date or FB what's your choice? Forget about these two move on and find one that's seems interested in you and not just adding more guys to their FB friends list.
TheFinalWord Posted September 11, 2017 Posted September 11, 2017 As a general rule though, I would not invest a lot of thought into 19 year-old unless she is extremely mature. To answer your question, no it does not mean she is uninterested. However, you have not really shown an interest by adding her on social media. It's just easy to overlook e-mails or she may not feel like investing much in a pen pal. Your best bet to gauge is to ask her out for coffee or lunch. If she flakes, she's not interested, if she shows up, you know some interest is there. If she shows up for 3 dates in a row that's when you can start to assess things as a more serious dating relationship. I would not add her over FB when barely knowing her.
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