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How to deal with being dumped twice, by the same girl


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Posted

That last few months I have got a lot of help from this community. Thanks to all that replied to my posts.... now I'm after one last bit of advice.

 

I'll try and keep it short. 2 months ago I broke up with a girl. At the time she was very clear it was what she wanted. There was no going back in her eyes. I respected that. I did not contact her. I worked know myself. After 6 weeks I better her to exchange belongings

 

She then told me shed had regrets, reassessed what was important, and though she was feeling very vulnerable asked me on a date, we spent a great day together, we kissed, we're intimate, said I was a changed man.

 

A week later she tells me it is not what she wants, that although she loves me a lot there is an incompatibility which means she does think we have a future.

 

This stings. It's hard enough being told this once, but a second time it seems to hurt more. I also feel angry. I allowed my heart to be broken twice by the same woman. I told her there won't be a third time.

 

I guess what I'm looking for is any advice that people can give, or if anyone has been through the same thing.

Posted

Cut all contact including social media and do not accept anymore communication from her. Think long and hard before giving anymore ex's a second chance in the future. What she did is not uncommon.

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Posted

I'm thinking that she broke up with you so in her mind it would be on her terms. Their are a lot of men and women that have to have the "last word".

I would just go NC. And that includes blocking her number.

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Posted

Thanks guys for the advice. I intend to go NC.... there is one caveat that I forgot to add... she works right next to me. There is a very real chance that I will see her again whether I want to or not.

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Posted

That's something else I'd like some help dealing with

Posted
I'm thinking that she broke up with you so in her mind it would be on her terms. Their are a lot of men and women that have to have the "last word".

I would just go NC. And that includes blocking her number.

 

I wouldn't go as far as blocking her number. You guys are bound to see each other and it didn't end too badly. She's probably dating a few guys and depending on the vibe of the communication you guys are having it pushes her further away or brings her in. Communicate wisely if at all.

 

Go NC, but don't block her. If she reaches out be friendly invite her to meet. In the meantime, get back into dating to keep your mind off things.

Posted
Thanks guys for the advice. I intend to go NC.... there is one caveat that I forgot to add... she works right next to me. There is a very real chance that I will see her again whether I want to or not.

 

Yes me dude I work wth my ex we broke up a yr ago and work in the same office it's hell. It's hell because at some stage she will start dating again and u will see it just like I did. I'm kinda stick because it's a good co and good money but I'm always thinking how to change and get out. It doesn't get easier either it just prolongs ur healing unessary suffering is the best word describe this situation. If u can free yourself and find another job or transfer somewhere else away from her.

Posted

Why would you invite someone to meet up with you when they dumped you not once but TWICE?

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Posted

if i can help it is don't intend to have any interaction with this person again.

Posted

I'd say if you run into her, avoid talking to her if you can. If you can't, then just keep the interaction as short as you can.

 

Don't be hard on yourself for giving her a chance. If you hadn't met with her again, you would have been wondering how things would have turned out. If she'd done this to you before, then I'd say you had a reason to stop seeing her. But when it's just once, you had no way of knowing how things would turn out.

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