inaknot Posted September 3, 2017 Posted September 3, 2017 Hello everyone. I've been going to the same Chinese Takeaway for about 5 years. In the last couple months, the girl serving me has appeared to give me signals she liked me. Whilst I waited for my food to arrive, she would chat to me, then when the food arrived, she would grab on to the food and laugh and say 'Oh it's too soon you can't go". This happened a few times. Then about a month ago I walked in and she was below the counter sitting down, she got up and said oh you caught me eating chocolate, then she smiled and said here you have some. Then about two weeks ago I went there and she said hold on, she came back with some Pringles and said do you want some? So we ate the Pringles, then she said these are nice but I like Chocolate, I said who doesn't and laughed, she went off again and said here you go and gave me a Ferrero Rafaello. So I'm starting to think hmm does she like me? I thought what can I do to try and find out without being in her face as I like getting food from there, so I bought a Toblerone (this post is like an encylopedia of Chocolate!) put it in my pocket and went and ordered food there. I managed to offer her the Toblerone and she said no that's yours I can't take it. We chatted then as I went I said here just take it, but she put on a pretend angry face and said No, no it's yours. Cut to this week and I was on my way to a BBQ, so I thought here's a chance to go chat to her and get some rice for the BBQ. I went there and said I can't stay long I just need to get some rice for BBQ I'm going to tonight, and she pretended to have a sad face put her finger up to her lip and said "Oh take me to the BBQ!" and I laughed and said but you're working! Then my brain is saying OK I'm 99% certain she likes you. Now what I'd done in the week is make a business card with my name / job title / facebook / instagram on it, made it look professional, I was going to give her the card but I chickened out as a customer walked in. I also dropped some money on the floor whilst I was there accidentally. So I go to the BBQ, I'm thinking about her and thinking damn why didn't I just cut to the chase and give her the card and say here's my details if you wan't to go to the next BBQ in a jokey laid back way. Then I think wait I dropped some money, I can make up something to go back there and say I think I lost money on the floor. Then as I leave the BBQ at about 10pm, my friend gives me some awesome cakes on a plate, I think hold on this is a better idea, go give her the cakes on the plate. So I turn up there, there's no other customers, I look through the window and she sees me, I then walk in and say hey these are for you, and she goes wow! thanks so much you're so sweet! Oh these are great! Then I say you're welcome she asks was the BBQ great and I said yeah, then I start to feel nervous and go to walk out then I think no give her the business card idiot, so I'm sort of awkwardly standing half walking away half looking at her, and I fumble about in my wallet, get the card and I said if you're looking for a computer sometime (that's my line of work) here's my details , and she's looking down at the card and sort of say bye then go off in my car. By this time it's about 10.30pm and I get home and think wtf why did you do it like that, you should have been more straight forward, so what I'm asking is do you think she got the hint I like her and if she liked me would she eventually contact me as she has all my details. Or do I have to go do more and be more direct? I also don't want to be a creepy customer. So I'm confused if I should do more or just leave it. I feel like going back there tonight and seeing if she's there and asking her straight but my problem is being too impulsive and not thinking things through sometimes. So that's why I came to ask for advice here.
d0nnivain Posted September 3, 2017 Posted September 3, 2017 After 5 years she knows you are not a creepy guy. Next time you go there, straight up ask her on a proper date. You say, Hey, do you ever get a day off? I'd love to take you out to dinner & for a great chocolate dessert. I promise no Chinese food. What do you say? See what she says / does. If she says no, never bring it up again. 2
smackie9 Posted September 3, 2017 Posted September 3, 2017 Dude dude that is soooooo beta. Bringing a gift, giving your card with the lame-o excuse, if you ever need a computer..blah!! I don't know if you can ever recover from that. You know that sucked. Firstly, you should have started with doing a sly teasing, like "Hey miss chocolate...." or, "Hey where's the chocolate.." "What? sitting down on the job? shame on you!" Be all goofy. Later you lean in and with a wry smile ask her in a cheeky way, "so..... are you single?" You read her reaction, if it's negative and she's avoiding you, you always have a come back like, "well you shouldn't be" (single), or "a pretty girl like you?" Always be nonchalant about it so she has trouble reading you....being mysterious is key..... If it was positive and she blushes, that's what you say "How about I take you out some time. let us exchange numbers. key factor is that you tell her, not ask her. Confidence flatters them....being all beta...turn off.
Miss Spider Posted September 3, 2017 Posted September 3, 2017 If she says no, never bring it up again. And find a new place for Chinese 1
Author inaknot Posted September 5, 2017 Author Posted September 5, 2017 Thanks for all the replies. I did just see her on my day off I was walking to work to pick up a parcel for me and she was walking straight to me. She looked a bit hesistant then she waved enthusiastically and came up to me. So I said hello how you doing? Going anywhere nice? She said just off to print some photos and off she went. Yeah yeah I should have just asked her out at that point but I really was caught off guard, I'm not one of these guys that just thinks on his feet quickly. Anyway she didn't avoid me, but yes I just need to get it over with and ask.
CptInsano Posted September 5, 2017 Posted September 5, 2017 (edited) And find a new place for Chinese Not sure I'd risk a good Chinese place over a woman. But seriously, you just have to ask her out. Edited September 5, 2017 by CptInsano 1
d0nnivain Posted September 5, 2017 Posted September 5, 2017 When you saw her outside of work, that was the perfect opportunity. Start rehearsing what you are going to say now. You have to be prepared.
normal person Posted September 5, 2017 Posted September 5, 2017 (edited) By this time it's about 10.30pm and I get home and think wtf why did you do it like that, you should have been more straight forward, so what I'm asking is do you think she got the hint I like her and if she liked me would she eventually contact me as she has all my details. Or do I have to go do more and be more direct? If you like someone (especially if you're a man), the pressure is on you to do the legwork in asking them out. Handing her your business card to suggest she do all the work for you isn't going to do you any favors. I also don't want to be a creepy customer. So I'm confused if I should do more or just leave it. I feel like going back there tonight and seeing if she's there and asking her straight but my problem is being too impulsive and not thinking things through sometimes. If you're so sure she likes you, then it's not creepy. All you have to do is be direct and she'll probably respect your confidence. But if you're indirect, passive, and deferential, then you're weak in her eyes. You can't take a half measure and expect her to do all the work for you because you're too scared to do it yourself. That's not a good look for a grown man. And neither is bringing rice to a bbq. Sorry, but you need to know. Edited September 5, 2017 by normal person
smackie9 Posted September 5, 2017 Posted September 5, 2017 Not sure I'd risk a good Chinese place over a woman. But seriously, you just have to ask her out. I agree a good Chinese food place is hard to find....do you really want to give that up OP?
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