Xiomn Posted September 2, 2017 Posted September 2, 2017 You agreed to go on a date but in reality you weren't interested and didn't want to upset the guy and/or you were scared of the guy getting angry at your honest response of a no. Another guy came along, you had other options and this guy was a lot more appealing. You got suddenly scared as the date approached and couldn't handle it. I've been flaked on a few times. As a result I respect the women that show up a lot from the outset. This thread was sparked from a girl flaking on me tonight after she said she would love to meet up for drinks and I had confirmed the day before without a problem. Now she reads my messages but ignores me. I replied 'It's cool, maybe some other time.' And don't have any plans of further contact unless she makes an effort to pursue me. I expect she just wasn't as interested as she made out to be. Fair dos. I Kind of already expect the answers above but nonetheless would love to hear it from women themselves as to why they flake like this. Fire away ladies.
Annalie Posted September 2, 2017 Posted September 2, 2017 You agreed to go on a date but in reality you weren't interested and didn't want to upset the guy and/or you were scared of the guy getting angry at your honest response of a no. Another guy came along, you had other options and this guy was a lot more appealing. You got suddenly scared as the date approached and couldn't handle it. I've been flaked on a few times. As a result I respect the women that show up a lot from the outset. This thread was sparked from a girl flaking on me tonight after she said she would love to meet up for drinks and I had confirmed the day before without a problem. Now she reads my messages but ignores me. I replied 'It's cool, maybe some other time.' And don't have any plans of further contact unless she makes an effort to pursue me. I expect she just wasn't as interested as she made out to be. Fair dos. I Kind of already expect the answers above but nonetheless would love to hear it from women themselves as to why they flake like this. Fire away ladies. Before meeting my current bf, I flaked on an amazing guy. He seemed perfect and did everything right. After I confirmed I was interested in meeting him, and he suggested the day and time and offered his phone number, I never responded. Why did I flake? He seemed too perfect for me at the time. He had a great career, great (Ivy League) college he went to and PhD degree. I was a mess. I was still working on my BA, I had to work full time and just assumed that he would probably prefer someone closer to his lifestyle. I am sure most people would be happy to meet someone who is successful and seems nice. People who have confidence, I guess. But not me.
Eternal Sunshine Posted September 3, 2017 Posted September 3, 2017 I flaked because I wasn't interested enough and didn't really feel excited to see him. When I pictured kissing him, I felt "meh". In our previous conversation, he seems to have a style of conversing that's more surface level. Like he would touch on many different topics but only discuss them for a few minutes. I am someone who enjoys talking about one topic at more depth (any topic really). If we discuss movies, I want to discuss movie plots and all the nuances for example and it could easily go for 1+ hours. Just didn't feel the intellectual compatibility. None of this was clear to this guy as I can pleasantly converse with anyone..
Miss Spider Posted September 3, 2017 Posted September 3, 2017 Usually because I just wasn't interested enough
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted September 3, 2017 Posted September 3, 2017 Can only speak for myself, but if I would flake it would be because I valued my alone time more than I valued meeting said person....so that would mean I just was not that excited to meet them. I really like my alone time so I have to be very interested in someone to actually make time for them. If I don't make time, I'm not very intrigued/interested. But this is just me! 1
ly399 Posted September 3, 2017 Posted September 3, 2017 There are many reasons... Sorry I it's very contextual. Many times it is the guy wasn't interesting or attractive enough. And at the same time I was dealing a lot from work and life in general. It sounds terrible, but if you see what I had to handle you'd understand I don't want to get myself out of bed and go entertain a stranger. What I try to do is be as honest as possible even if I don't feel like it Please don't feel bad, it says nothing about you as a person. I understand people can take things personally, but more likely than not it's their preference and issues in life.
smackie9 Posted September 3, 2017 Posted September 3, 2017 Women flake because they don't like confrontation when breaking the news to a guy that there not interested. The repercussions are for example: "You led me on", "You are a _____". "Why don't you like me?" "What did I do wrong?!! "etc. No one wants to deal with that.
Eternal Sunshine Posted September 3, 2017 Posted September 3, 2017 Can only speak for myself, but if I would flake it would be because I valued my alone time more than I valued meeting said person....so that would mean I just was not that excited to meet them. I really like my alone time so I have to be very interested in someone to actually make time for them. If I don't make time, I'm not very intrigued/interested. But this is just me! This too. Last time when I agreed to another date, I thought I would give it one more date just to make sure I'm not interested. When Friday rolled around, I realized I had not had any alone time all week and was so looking forward to spending the evening by myself. Then I remembered the date and I just felt depressed at the prospect of losing that time for someone I am really not that interested in. So I cancelled on Friday morning. Bottom line: she is not that interested.
Recommended Posts