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How to approach a waitress?

Nixis

By Nixis
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Nixis New Member

Nixis

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Posted

Hi,

 

So, there's this really cute chinese waitress at a local restaurant I really wouldn't mind knowing more about. She seems somewhat shy, but friendly and approachable, and I will absolutely try and initiate contact. But I don't really want to make her uncomfortable in the middle of the restuarant, so my idea is to, at first, just ask for her name, and then back off and see how she behaves (without being a creep, obviously). Then depending on the situation I may ask for her number, leave her mine, wait until next time or just leave it be. Is this the way to go? Any suggestions?

 

Thanks

bummer Established Member

bummer

Posted
Posted

order something with the szechuan sauce. eat it. when she refills your water, ask her name. banter for 5 minutes. leave your name and number with your tip and tell her to call you. no pressure, she can say no.

carhill Established Member

carhill

Posted
Posted

Make eye contact and engage beyond a dry review of the menu and order. Observe her response and compare to how she interacts with other diners while you're waiting for your order. She if she makes random eye contact or glances in your direction.

 

Women who interact with the public as much as waitresses do know how to elevate interest in one diner or respond to interest. If she's not married or attached and wants to get to know you better, she knows how to do that. Since you're apparently interested, open the door. Humor helps.

Chilli Established Member

Chilli

Posted
Posted

There ya go , all sorted.

 

let us know what she says eh . :cool:

d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

Posted
Posted

Waitresses & bartenders get hit on all the time. They generally don't like it. That said, they like it for the right guy.

 

 

Become a regular. Talk to her a few times. Then worry about dating her.

  • Like 3
Camillus Member

Camillus

Posted
Posted

When I was younger a friend of mine wanted to meet the young lady working at a book store.

 

he wouldn't approach her so I did. It went like this.

 

Me: Hi, my name is ______ and I was wondering if you would like to go to a movie sometime?

Her: but I don't know you?

Me: fair enough, how about I buy you a coffee and we chat, if you like me then we can go to a movie?

Her: sounds fair, OK

 

we dated for a few months.

 

girls are at least as nervous as you are.

  • Like 2
coolheadal Established Member

coolheadal

Posted
Posted (edited)
Hi,

 

So, there's this really cute chinese waitress at a local restaurant I really wouldn't mind knowing more about. She seems somewhat shy, but friendly and approachable, and I will absolutely try and initiate contact. But I don't really want to make her uncomfortable in the middle of the restuarant, so my idea is to, at first, just ask for her name, and then back off and see how she behaves (without being a creep, obviously). Then depending on the situation I may ask for her number, leave her mine, wait until next time or just leave it be. Is this the way to go? Any suggestions?

 

Thanks

 

First thing you do is this..

You say this:

 

1. I am sure your boyfriend and you are going to that musical event weekend it starts at 8 pm? The (insert you make-up in your head or use something local instead.

 

In #1 you need to make sure she's single and not seeing anyone. If she is then your not embarrassed an neither is she!

 

Once you get the answer in #1 if she's single no bf then move to #2.

 

You say this:

 

2. Hey what are your plans this weekend, I was thinking if it was okay with you how about you and I going to that musical event (remember this is made up so if there is one make sure you know when it starts). Insert whatever you want in there okay.

 

In #2 you get a yes then go to #3. If you get a no ask her about another weekend event or ask maybe she rather hangout with you at a local cafe or coffee/tea cafe.

 

You say and do this:

 

3. Can I get your number, and I'll call you with more details or text you if that's already with you. Make sure you ask for her first name by now you should have told her you first name.

 

The rest is easy just get enough confidence to do all of this so you don't look weak in her face.

 

Tip: When you order something to drink ask her to tell you what they have, this way you can see if she tells you everything they have or not. The same thing with desert. This way she sticks around you longer.

 

Good Luck!

Edited by coolheadal
CryForNoOne Established Member

CryForNoOne

Posted
Posted (edited)
order something with the szechuan sauce. eat it. when she refills your water, ask her name. banter for 5 minutes. leave your name and number with your tip and tell her to call you. no pressure, she can say no.

 

DO NOT DO THIS!!! There is nothing less appealing to a woman than a guy who lacks the confidence to even ask her out directly. I was having this very conversation with a waitress and bartender who both get hit on constantly. They said they would NEVER go out with a guy who scribbles his number on the check. It means he doesn't even have the balls to ask them out directly. They said it's really impressive if a guy walks straight up and asks them out. No pickup line needed. Just ask. Don't linger or stare too long either.

 

Another thing they said is there is nothing worse than feeling trapped by a guy who is creeping on them. That means don't stare, linger, or go there 12 times before saying a word to them. They aren't stupid. They know when guys are doing this. It means he either lacks confidence, is creepy, or both. Just ask her out just before you leave the restaurant, so you don't make her feel uncomfortable by lingering IF she says no. You may be surprised by how easy it is.

Edited by CryForNoOne
  • Like 1
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Nixis New Member

Nixis

Posted
  • Author
Posted
DO NOT DO THIS!!! There is nothing less appealing to a woman than a guy who lacks the confidence to even ask her out directly. I was having this very conversation with a waitress and bartender who both get hit on constantly. They said they would NEVER go out with a guy who scribbles his number on the check. It means he doesn't even have the balls to ask them out directly. They said it's really impressive if a guy walks straight up and asks them out. No pickup line needed. Just ask. Don't linger or stare too long either.

 

Another thing they said is there is nothing worse than feeling trapped by a guy who is creeping on them. That means don't stare, linger, or go there 12 times before saying a word to them. They aren't stupid. They know when guys are doing this. It means he either lacks confidence, is creepy, or both. Just ask her out just before you leave the restaurant, so you don't make her feel uncomfortable by lingering IF she says no. You may be surprised by how easy it is.

 

Thanks to everyone who replied, I really enjoyed reading your suggestions.

 

But I think I agree with you. Being too strategic or taking too long seems like a bad idea, so does being overly brash, better to just get done with it directly. That's why I was thinking about approaching her in a friendly way and asking her name just to gauge her reaction, and then get an exchange of numbers or a date going, either a few minutes later before leaving or on a second visit.

 

You back me up on this?

alphamale Established Member

alphamale

Posted
Posted
Any suggestions?

yes, don't date (or ask to date) any woman who works for tips

alphamale Established Member

alphamale

Posted
Posted
That said, they like it for the right guy.

yes, tall, dark, and handsome like me :laugh:

CryForNoOne Established Member

CryForNoOne

Posted
Posted
Thanks to everyone who replied, I really enjoyed reading your suggestions.

 

But I think I agree with you. Being too strategic or taking too long seems like a bad idea, so does being overly brash, better to just get done with it directly. That's why I was thinking about approaching her in a friendly way and asking her name just to gauge her reaction, and then get an exchange of numbers or a date going, either a few minutes later before leaving or on a second visit.

 

You back me up on this?

 

Absolutely the correct approach.

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Nixis New Member

Nixis

Posted
  • Author
Posted
Absolutely the correct approach.

 

I'll let you know how it plays out.

 

Thanks, everyone

Chilli Established Member

Chilli

Posted
Posted (edited)

The only problem with some of this and the theories is you need o linger a bit.

It's damn had to get the chance for a good look at someone and the feel of things , in shops or bars or whatever.

 

There was one for me a mth ago , and when l went back the second time she just looked totally different and l completely lost interest.

So thank God l didn't just ask her the first time.

 

And now coincidentally a mth later there's some new girl in another shop l use, seems like a real sweetheart that l've been thinking about. Trouble is it only takes about 2 seconds to be served and done people buzzing everywhere they're usually in a rush and off,and they're in service so they're nice to everyone not just you.

So you can't even get a feel for things or her personality without a few visits first.

But this is still all very handy and l must remember , don't stare too much or be creepy while your deciding.

Edited by Chilli
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