WaitingForBardot Posted August 30, 2017 Posted August 30, 2017 (edited) IMO, wasting peoples' time is not okay. Everybody winds up late occasionally, but chronic tardiness is disrespectful. I don't get upset when it happens, but if it became a pattern, or they gave me a clue that it was going to be a pattern, I'd be out... ... But the overarching message from the late apologists is: This is me; adapt the world around me. ... 100% agree. Reminds me of the quote from Bobby Slayton (IIRC): "Is it my fault that the world can't adapt to my lifestyle!?" Edited August 30, 2017 by WaitingForBardot 2
Echo74 Posted August 30, 2017 Posted August 30, 2017 what i hav enoticed is that women are often forgiven more for being late than men.....look at a wedding day fro example it si quite often expected on one of the most important days of a persons life it is the woman who is customarily late.....when you go out on a friday night being early is almost a faux pas......i have quite a few friends awho are nearly always ....late...theyare the kindest group of friends i have ever had in my life.....not like hours late but fifteen minutes is very common...and i would wait for them....any day ....and i really believe they wouldnt sweat me fifteen minutes either.... i tend to run on time......but i can see where it might be annoying for some......time is short.....deb The above mentioned are more customary and quite different to a person who admits to "always" being late when meeting someone for a date. That said, I choose to being considerate of other peoples time so I'm on time unless there's unexpected traffic. If I'll be late I do contact the person to advise as such. If I'm waiting for a date I would allow 15 minutes. If the person admitted to always being late...it would be our one and only date. His time is no more important than mine. But we're all different as these posts prove, so it's what you choose to put up with.
knabe Posted August 30, 2017 Posted August 30, 2017 I would think it's a good thing on the contrary. At least people show you who they are for real from the start. Would you prefer he tries to change for you but can't hold it? then it would have really been a waste of your time. You know yourself and you know you can't deal with someone on the laid-back side that's late most of the time. It does not need to be categorized as good or bad, it simply needs to be categorized as 'not good for you'. This man may not be for you but he can make another laid-back woman pretty happy. ETA: So to get back to OP. If it's a big deal to her she needs to let this man go. No one is telling her to change to accommodate him. I'm actually fairly laid back. But I'm not selfish, and I do not expect the rest of the world to adapt to my bad habits. And being chronically significantly late IS a bad habit, and one that can be changed. We REALLY think it's good for us to expect the world to adapt to all of our idiosyncrasies, especially the ones that waste their time? Boy.....I really AM old.
caveman621 Posted August 30, 2017 Posted August 30, 2017 Wow! This is one of my pet peeves and it seems like it has a VAST difference of opinions! Love this thread! About "being brought up differently", I know that in some cultures it's perfectly acceptable. I'll hope I don't offend and have my information correct. But, from what I understand, in, for example, Latin American countries, it's considered rude to leave a conversation you are engaged in. So, if you say, "I'm enjoying this conversation but I have to go. I have an appointment.", that's considered rude. But the person you are meeting, knowing this, just knows you might be late and doesn't get upset about it. I work tutoring non native English speakers and during our training we were told about this and how they can have a hard time letting students know they are expected to be on time. 1
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