guild11 Posted August 28, 2017 Posted August 28, 2017 Hello guys, some of you read my earlier so I'll try to make it short. She is 28 I'm 27, we work in the same company, I am supervisor and she is my boss, we broke up after 2 years about 3 month ago and she is the 1st woman I fell in love with. She has a new boyfriend and she cheated on him with me few days ago, basically we let the feelings take over and we both did wrong. I had sexual interaction with 5 women after her but none of them gave me the similar experience as I had with my ex. I cannot quit my job because I plan to get a higher position and progress further within the company. Sometimes my feelings for her flood my mind and I can't think logically... And that affects all aspects of my life. How do you fight the feelings ? How do I overcome them whenever they make me think of her ? How do you manage to give yourself a peace of mind whenever you miss your ex ?
preraph Posted August 28, 2017 Posted August 28, 2017 Well, not having boundaries is what got you into this mess and you're badly in need of some boundaries now, and some self-discipline. It's getting messy and I don't see how there can be a good outcome where you are comfortable continuing to work there OR she wants to promote you once this thing hits the final wall. You need to decide what it is you want and what your priorities are and then set some rules for yourself to follow to stay on the path of achieving your Number 1 goal. 1
Author guild11 Posted September 1, 2017 Author Posted September 1, 2017 Well, not having boundaries is what got you into this mess and you're badly in need of some boundaries now, and some self-discipline. It's getting messy and I don't see how there can be a good outcome where you are comfortable continuing to work there OR she wants to promote you once this thing hits the final wall. You need to decide what it is you want and what your priorities are and then set some rules for yourself to follow to stay on the path of achieving your Number 1 goal. I did good before seeing her again and getting physical again... We had sex twice and it didn't end there, day after we met she got extremely ill, she was in the hospital due some virus, she asked me to visit her and I did, I was very worried so I had to be with her since she didn't had any close relatives to take care of her and her BF was out of the country. I didn't care that she have a BF and I'm basically no one, now I feel like I moved back to the starting point and all the feelings for her are back. I will take your advice and build some boundaries and self discipline, it will work after some time I'm sure. I'm not worried about the job, she is not that kind of person who will try to sabotage in order to get me fired. Also she needs me more than I need her at work. Thank you.
d0nnivain Posted September 1, 2017 Posted September 1, 2017 You fight the feelings by never being alone with the other person. Don't even have private phone conversations or e-mail exchanges. If your only interactions are in the middle of the office at work, you can't very well have sex on the desk with all your co-workers watching. When you are alone & you feel yourself thinking about an EX, get up & do something physical -- go for a walk or run; clean the house; do jumping jacks, call a friend (not your EX). In short exercise self control.
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