Angel29 Posted August 28, 2017 Posted August 28, 2017 My love interest and I have known each for years through a walking group but we have never dated due to a communication breakdown. Recently we have started to become closed again. It could possible go somewhere but he is a cautious as the last few years he has been hurt dating. There is a group weekend away with the walking group. Many of my friends have said they are going but I have been hesitant to put my name down as I know he is going with his friends so I know we won't have any time alone, I don't want him to think I am being a stalker and I probably won't see him as he will be with his friends. On the other hand I want to go regardless as I enjoy walking even if he is there or not. Many of my friends keep asking me to come and say I shouldn't care what he thinks. They're seem disappointed I'm not going. If I did go I would keep some distance as I don't want to seem clingy. What should I do?
Erik30 Posted August 28, 2017 Posted August 28, 2017 Just go and have fun with your friends, be yourself and act natural around him. He'll only think you're a stalker if he isn't interested 2
Versacehottie Posted August 28, 2017 Posted August 28, 2017 Absolutely go! Your friends are right. It is an interest of yours--why should you drop that because of him? It's where you met--so? Life is too short to put your life and things you like to do on hold because you are worried about what it will look like to some guy. Put yourself in the mindset to decide what YOU want. All the other decisions are secondary. Sounds like you want to go. When you are there (and if he happens to be there too), I'd put most of my attention on the walking and your friends. Have no agenda when it comes to him but be friendly and cordial when he is in your space. If he makes a bit of effort, make a bit back but never more than he does. Let him think you are friends for now. That should cleanse any stalker vibe or having him think you're chasing after him. You can manage yourself. To keep doing what you like and not back down, enjoy your life with confidence, right in front of him, and give him little attention without acting hurt or scared is about as good as things can get to have another "chance". Goodluck
Robratory Posted August 28, 2017 Posted August 28, 2017 To me, your post is just not very clear. You say you've known your love interest "for years" but never dated because of a communication breakdown. But a communication breakdown is solved in seconds. How did this one last "for years?" But apparently the communication breakdown has now been solved, so why would he now think you're clingy or stalking him? Why wouldn't he be ecstatic? Why is he going to be hanging out with "his friends." Are you a friend of his? And what does it mean that he's "cautious?" You know this "oh, I've been hurt so I'm cautious" is a bunch of bull, right? There's no such thing. You're either in our your out. So what's really going on? I have to wonder if this romance is mostly one-sided on your part. Is he onboard or not?
Miss Spider Posted August 28, 2017 Posted August 28, 2017 I find if you have to ask yourself if you're being a stalker, you usually are lol. What's your reasoning for going on the trip? Is it to go on a hike/walk with your friends or is it rekindle something with this guy? If it's the former, go for it. If it's the latter, pass, because it is apparent from your other posts anything with him is a toxic dead end
smackie9 Posted August 28, 2017 Posted August 28, 2017 I know your history with this guy....he has no romantic interest in you he's just being friendly. He has np asking out other women in the group, but hasn't asked you out....there's a reason why huh? This crap has been playing in your head for way too long. He's not that into you, and you need to stop hanging onto false hope. You are a part of this group as much as he is, so why should you care whether he is there or not? Nothing is going to happen whether you two are alone or not. 1
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