No idea what to think

[1fish2fish]

She probably expected you to cry, beg, or plead with her to change her mind. The fact that you maintained your self respect may have thrown her for a loop. I'm not sure what she expected, though, after breaking up with you via text. What a coward. I have a cowardly ex too.

 

After 7 years, she's lonely. But it's not YOU that she misses - it's the benefits of being with you and being in a secure (up until the end) relationship.

 

If you haven't done so already, block her everywhere. Stop checking her facebook, and remove all her family and friends too. This is *key* to your healing. Every time you find out info about her is a setback. Your emotions will be like a roller coaster and the key is to ride it out. The ups and downs will smooth out over time and you have to remind yourself when feel low that you've survived the really hard days thus far, and this too shall pass.

 

It's going to take a looooong time to heal after 7 years. The sooner you focus 100% on yourself and stop giving her mental space in your head, the further you'll be along in your healing.

 

Don't stop posting. This is a great support system here.

[Captivating]

Hi,

I agree with every response up here.

She expected to get the "normal" response from you, begging and pleading .... that did not happen, so now she is questioning everything including her own decision.

Don't fall for any of her breadcrumbs laid out for you !

If she would be an honest stand-up girl wanting you back then she would show up at your doorstep and talk to you.

The way she ended things is very flaky and immature ! It's a reflection on her.

 

You know, a lot of young people think that after the highly fueled honey-moon stage ends in a relationship, there is something wrong with the relationship. It is normal relationship dynamic though.

 

I understand that you are hurting badly after losing a 7 year relationship. It is also very admirable how you handled this, it shows self-respect.

No contact will help you heal faster, so do not look her up, don't let her to reach out to you either on phone/computer....if she wants to really get you back, she needs to show up at your door ! Self preservation is your goal, it will take time, be kind to yourself, eat well, sleep a lot !!

Maybe this might have been a blessing in the BIG scope of things....what if she leaves you after marriage and kids.

HUGS !!!

[mon.]

You're the most respectable dumpee around here! Lol

 

Keep it up!

[Been]

She sent you the break up text fully expecting you to respond in some way and when you didn't it screwed up her expectations.

You showed strength when she thought you wouldn't.

And a word of caution to you- if you ever contact her to "explain" anything to her you will give her exactly what she was looking for in the first place. Good for you on standing your ground !!

[MadMax20]

Thanks for the replies! You guys are awesome. I agree with all of you. Even though I am hurting, I know there's light at the end of this tunnel, somewhere. When you invest that kind of time, it hurts like no other to pretty much become a distant memory to the other person, THAT FAST. But I also understand that there's nothing I could've done to stop her from doing this.

 

I pride myself on not responding to her text. And if I'm being completely honest, I do enjoy that void that it creates on her end. Sometimes, I often feel that she'd be too embarrassed/prideful to try and reach out again.. Since I set the stage for something different by holding onto my own self-respect.

 

Better days are to come.. I feel like I've dealt with the roughest part of the storm already (the first few weeks after it all happened). Now I'm just riding the wave!