Sportaflop Posted August 24, 2017 Share Posted August 24, 2017 (edited) So me and this girl are 16 and work in the same place. My sister teaches her ballet so she knows who I am, and the last couple days she was there when my shift at work ended she'd say bye to me in a nice kind of way and I'd say bye back quickly as I walked out. Based on our interactions it seems like she likes me. The problem is that I'm not exactly attracted to her. I think she's cute, and she seems very nice, but I just don't exactly feel the way I do about someone that you see and think like "she's hot". I wouldn't exactly be keen on asking her out, but I feel like if I got the chance I would take it, and it seems like I have the chance. I'm kind of torn on what to do. I have her phone number for work purposes so if I wanted to text or call her I could. There would exactly be another way to ask her out if I wanted to because the only time I see her is when she is working her shift, and there are people around and she's sometimes busy so I'd have to ask her through the phone. The reason I'm torn is because she's cute and seems nice but like I said, I'm not exactly attracted to her. And I know that if I didn't want to there are plenty of other chances. I'd just like anyone's opinion on whether or not I should ask her out and how to go about doing it. Edited August 25, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Paragraphs Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted August 24, 2017 Share Posted August 24, 2017 So me and this girl are 16 and work in the same place.. i can already tell that this isn't going to end well Link to post Share on other sites
normal person Posted August 25, 2017 Share Posted August 25, 2017 Based on our interactions it seems like she likes me. The problem is that I'm not exactly attracted to her. If you're not attracted to her, no, you shouldn't ask her out. It'd be waste of time, money, and her emotional capital. You don't have to burden yourself with this non-issue. Do nothing. Problem solved. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sportaflop Posted August 25, 2017 Author Share Posted August 25, 2017 (edited) That's the thing, I don't find her hot in the way I find someone else, but I could see myself being in a happy relationship with her. There's nothing that I think would go wrong and I don't think me not being attracted to her that much would give me any reason to break up with her. Edited August 25, 2017 by Sportaflop Link to post Share on other sites
Bastile Posted August 25, 2017 Share Posted August 25, 2017 Just because you can, doesn't mean you should. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sportaflop Posted August 25, 2017 Author Share Posted August 25, 2017 It's not the way you guys are thinking it is. Let me put it this way, if she asked me I would say yes. What I'm trying to figure out is whether or not ask her. Link to post Share on other sites
normal person Posted August 25, 2017 Share Posted August 25, 2017 (edited) That's the thing, I don't find her hot in the way I find someone else, but I could see myself being in a happy relationship with her. Just because you could see it still doesn't mean it's a good idea, or even an accurate assumption. I could see myself dating a lot of people in a hypothetical world where I don't have to deal with the ancillary, unsexy aspects and obligations of being in a relationship. It doesn't mean I don't know there are a lot of other people I'm better suited for who I don't even have to hesitate over, or with whom I'd be more willing to deal with those things. There's nothing that I think would go wrong Well for one, you aren't attracted to her. and I don't think me not being attracted to her that much would give me any reason to break up with her. People enter into romantic relationships because they're attracted to each other. Not because they aren't. If you aren't attracted to someone, there isn't any point in being more than friends, unless you're someone who just wants to bang and doesn't care about wasting peoples' time and messing with their feelings. Hopefully you aren't. It's not the way you guys are thinking it is. Let me put it this way, if she asked me I would say yes. So what you mean is that if she made the bigger emotional gamble in asking you out, then you wouldn't feel as guilty about it because you'd feel like merely opting into a relationship you're not fully invested in is less deceitful than pushing for you're not fully invested in. Not cool, if you ask me. If you're not attracted to someone, both are just as bad. Sorry. What I'm trying to figure out is whether or not ask her. No, if someone's natural appeal to you is only enough for you to oblige them, but not strong enough to want them, then you don't really like the person. Don't waste her time. Please. Go out with someone you're actually attracted to, everyone involved will be better off for it. Edited August 25, 2017 by normal person Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sportaflop Posted August 25, 2017 Author Share Posted August 25, 2017 I wouldn't say yes out of guilt, I'd say yes because I'd want to. It seems like you think by me saying I'm not that attracted to her means I'm disinterested, I am interested because she is cute and does seem really nice. It's a weird situation. Instead of trying to explain it, how about you just ask me questions and I'll answer them to help clear up the situation Link to post Share on other sites
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