Bastile Posted August 24, 2017 Posted August 24, 2017 What do ladies think when a guy offers a first date, but schedules for the weekend? Do you think that maybe the guy is high-interest, desperate, looking for sex, etc? What does it say of you, if you accept? Not multidating, bored, good interest, and so on? I usually prefer midweek first dates, but sometimes needs must.
basil67 Posted August 24, 2017 Posted August 24, 2017 I'm not dating.....but I imagine that I wouldn't think anything of it. I'm not inclined towards micro analysing. 6
Author Bastile Posted August 24, 2017 Author Posted August 24, 2017 I'm not dating.....but I imagine that I wouldn't think anything of it. I'm not inclined towards micro analysing. I'm not inclined towards being flaked on, and having a crap weekend. So, I'll be going to my watch my cousin's band if it falls through.
Imajerk17 Posted August 24, 2017 Posted August 24, 2017 (edited) I wouldn't sweat it. Everyone sometimes have space to fill on a Saturday--even the Cool People. If the woman accepts your plans for a weekend date it means that, as yourself, she has that time on the weekend free too. BTW I am familiar w the "advice" that says not to schedule a first date w a girl on the weekends, the claim being that her social calender is filled to the brim and that she'll think you're a loser if yours isn't too. It's hardly true. If a girl is interested in you then she will probably show. If she isn't then she will probably flake. That said, if this is a girl you met via cold-approach you really want to keep your momentum and get that first date in sooner rather than later---even if it means a weekend date. Strike while the iron is hot! Edited August 24, 2017 by Imajerk17 4
act00 Posted August 24, 2017 Posted August 24, 2017 I would prefer a weekend so I don't have to worry about bedtime and getting up in the morning. I work early and have a commute, so going out on weeknights can be tough, plus if things are going exceptionally well, you really don't get the opportunity to extend the evening. It could be a good self-limiter in that if it doesn't go well, you have an easy excuse not to stay, plus it could just force things to go a little slower. If the weekend is out due to prior plans, rather than extending out another week for the first date to the following weekend, I would prefer a weekday, as sooner over later is better. I don't judge the day. I don't see planning a weekend date as desperate, looking for sex, high interest, low interest or anything like that. It seems better to me if my dates also have a weekend-off schedule because you're free with no other obligations and that's definitely a good thing. I don't like it when men have another plan or other obligations for after the date (excluding bedtime and schedules). That suggests low interest and an escape plan. That's not to say the date can't go very well and plans for a second date, but having another obligation never sits well with me. It's not a deal-breaker, but I don't like it. 2
todreaminblue Posted August 24, 2017 Posted August 24, 2017 (edited) to me a weekend date makes sense.....a lot of people work and scheduling a mid week date can be a recipe for cancellations..nd or feelign tired after work and scheduling a date or rushing aroung during a lunch break...... a saturday morning date or an afternoon date, catching a matinee movie maybe seems normal..friday night dinner even.....but then..im a tad abnormal myself....as another poster wrote i am also unaware of such rules in regards to first dates on weekends and im actually big on etiquette and gentlemanly behaviors.....i do tend to analyse on a micro scale.....deb. Edited August 24, 2017 by todreaminblue 1
guest569 Posted August 24, 2017 Posted August 24, 2017 Love it! Weekend dates are far more relaxed for those who work through weekdays. 2
JuneL Posted August 24, 2017 Posted August 24, 2017 What do ladies think when a guy offers a first date, but schedules for the weekend? Do you think that maybe the guy is high-interest, desperate, looking for sex, etc? What does it say of you, if you accept? Not multidating, bored, good interest, and so on? I usually prefer midweek first dates, but sometimes needs must. I think Sunday morning or afternoon would be perfect. It's a little tiring to meet after work on a weekday (I want to be relaxed); it's also too much pressure to do a Fri evening or Sat evening date as a first meet. 1
SevenCity Posted August 24, 2017 Posted August 24, 2017 I think Sunday morning or afternoon would be perfect. It's a little tiring to meet after work on a weekday (I want to be relaxed); it's also too much pressure to do a Fri evening or Sat evening date as a first meet. I never do a day date at first - no romantic vibe. As far as weekends I think some valid points were made here. I prefer to do weekday meetups as well for first dates. It's easier to get out if it's not going well or can build anticipation for a weekend date if it is. It also gives the woman a sense of accomplishment as she "graduated" to the weekend. Problem with Saturday night is if you move her back to the week she might feel demoted. I personally like if a girl has a weekend open. I'm supposed to go out with one on Saturday for a first date so I'll let you know how it goes if it happens and she doesn't flake lol. 1
JuneL Posted August 24, 2017 Posted August 24, 2017 I never do a day date at first - no romantic vibe. Not even a happy hour? 1
SevenCity Posted August 24, 2017 Posted August 24, 2017 Not even a happy hour? Depends on the time of year. Has to be dark or getting dark by the time it is over. Women are much less apt to kiss on the first date during the daytime. It immediately throws a friend vibe on the date and kills any romance. Once you've slept with her sure, but not before. 1
Popsicle Posted August 25, 2017 Posted August 25, 2017 I used to tell them I was available on the weekends and that's it. 1
act00 Posted August 25, 2017 Posted August 25, 2017 It also gives the woman a sense of accomplishment as she "graduated" to the weekend. Uh, no. Really, no. 6
HarmonyDriven Posted August 25, 2017 Posted August 25, 2017 What do ladies think when a guy offers a first date, but schedules for the weekend? Do you think that maybe the guy is high-interest, desperate, looking for sex, etc? What does it say of you, if you accept? Not multidating, bored, good interest, and so on? I usually prefer midweek first dates, but sometimes needs must. When I did OLD from 2011-2014, most of my first dates were Friday or Saturday night. Sometimes, I did have first dates during the week nights, but they were few and far between. Weekend/evening dates are better for me as I work full time, commute, and weekends are much more relaxing. I, too, have never done a day date, I look for a potential romantic vibe. If there is none, I still try and have some fun via conversation, a drink, etc... When I was actively online dating and looking for a relationship, I made it a priority to be available for dates. 1
SevenCity Posted August 25, 2017 Posted August 25, 2017 Uh, no. Really, no. Tell a girlfriend you have other plans Saturday night and let me know if they get upset. Dinner > Lunch Weekend Night > Weekday Night 1
guest569 Posted August 25, 2017 Posted August 25, 2017 How absurd. A date is a date. If there is a friend vibe then she is just not interested. Or she doesn't want to kiss - either not ready or not interested. Nothing to do with how dark it is outside. Weekend date is not a 'promotion'. At all. 5
act00 Posted August 25, 2017 Posted August 25, 2017 Tell a girlfriend you have other plans Saturday night and let me know if they get upset. Dinner > Lunch Weekend Night > Weekday Night Girlfriend or potential girlfriend? If you're blowing off your girlfriend because you have better, other things to do on the weekend, it won't go over well. When you first meet someone, and your weekend plans have already been established, rather than pushing back another week, meeting on a weeknight or for afternoon or morning coffee is doable, but I can promise you, your ever so glowing presence is not that great and does not incite a sense of "accomplishment" or a sense of "graduating" to the in-crowd, and your aura of awesomeness and basking in having won some special honor that they get a Friday or Saturday night out of you does not exist with any woman who has two brain cells to rub together. But if it makes you feel better to think that way, by all means, keep it up. The arrogance is a turn-off. 4
Author Bastile Posted August 25, 2017 Author Posted August 25, 2017 I never do a day date at first - no romantic vibe. As far as weekends I think some valid points were made here. I prefer to do weekday meetups as well for first dates. It's easier to get out if it's not going well or can build anticipation for a weekend date if it is. It also gives the woman a sense of accomplishment as she "graduated" to the weekend. Problem with Saturday night is if you move her back to the week she might feel demoted. I personally like if a girl has a weekend open. I'm supposed to go out with one on Saturday for a first date so I'll let you know how it goes if it happens and she doesn't flake lol. You do have a point. You can't really take away the weekends from a girl and expect her to be okay with it. Unless you use trickery, lie, and say you are doing something else. Not sure I can be bothered with that now. And I don't have the stamina to see a woman on Friday, then a different one on Saturday anymore. I think I've finally been broken I'm going to ltr soon, you watch.
Els Posted August 25, 2017 Posted August 25, 2017 I'm not inclined towards being flaked on, and having a crap weekend. So, I'll be going to my watch my cousin's band if it falls through. Gosh, do you really NEED to be out with someone, otherwise it becomes a "crap weekend"? I honestly think there is waaaaay too much overthinking going on here. And you guys say us ladies overthink too much! I can't even remember if our first date was a weekday or weekend, to be honest. I remember a lot of other things about it, but not the day of the week! 3
CptInsano Posted August 25, 2017 Posted August 25, 2017 Gosh, do you really NEED to be out with someone, otherwise it becomes a "crap weekend"? I had the very same thought. The risk is minimal in the end. If she flakes you can always hang out with somebody or finally catch up on things you never had time for. 3
Miss Spider Posted August 25, 2017 Posted August 25, 2017 I can honestly say I have never thought about it. 1
SevenCity Posted August 25, 2017 Posted August 25, 2017 Girlfriend or potential girlfriend? If you're blowing off your girlfriend because you have better, other things to do on the weekend, it won't go over well. When you first meet someone, and your weekend plans have already been established, rather than pushing back another week, meeting on a weeknight or for afternoon or morning coffee is doable, but I can promise you, your ever so glowing presence is not that great and does not incite a sense of "accomplishment" or a sense of "graduating" to the in-crowd, and your aura of awesomeness and basking in having won some special honor that they get a Friday or Saturday night out of you does not exist with any woman who has two brain cells to rub together. But if it makes you feel better to think that way, by all means, keep it up. The arrogance is a turn-off. "Can't we just all get a long?". I wasn't talking about me specifically, rather how women can perceive a weekday vs. a weekend. Weekends only include 2 nights that are "free" (i.e.: no work the next day for most people). If someone is willing to spend one of those nights with you, it says more to them rather than an after work meeting. You may not care, but many women do. I'm not suggesting you purposely wait, but if it times out be aware of the connotations. Chillaxxx........ 1
Miss Spider Posted August 25, 2017 Posted August 25, 2017 But wait, now that I think about it x bf and I had our first date on a Saturday...omg!!!! I was totally gf material, interest level was so high I skipped over entry-level. Or he was desperate that weekend and looking for sex 1
SevenCity Posted August 25, 2017 Posted August 25, 2017 You do have a point. You can't really take away the weekends from a girl and expect her to be okay with it. Unless you use trickery, lie, and say you are doing something else. Not sure I can be bothered with that now. And I don't have the stamina to see a woman on Friday, then a different one on Saturday anymore. I think I've finally been broken I'm going to ltr soon, you watch. Dating is exhausting! 2
Author Bastile Posted August 25, 2017 Author Posted August 25, 2017 Gosh, do you really NEED to be out with someone, otherwise it becomes a "crap weekend"? Know what I think it is? I don't have a steady girl. Not having a steady girl leads to tomfoolery. I'm struggling to figure out what my routine should be, nowadays. I can't keep up what I used to do. I honestly think there is waaaaay too much overthinking going on here. And you guys say us ladies overthink too much! Last woman that I had on an earlyish Saturday first date told me weeks later that she thought I was going to see another woman further in the same evening (which I didn't). My thoughts don't just come out of the sky; they come from life experience. And she went on to be a steady girl that occupied my weekends henceforth. So Elsworth is thinking that Bastile is thinking what she's thinking. And she's wrong about that. Nice to hear how good the ladies generally feel about Saturday first dates though Dating is exhausting! Keeping one woman happy is missions. Keeping three happy is enough to drive me around the bend. I think dating is supposed to be tiring for men, tbh. Eggs are expensive and sperm is cheap.
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