LoveIsABattlefield36 Posted August 21, 2017 Posted August 21, 2017 I recently met this guy a few weeks ago at a group function with some mutual friends. Last week when we all hung out again he started asking me some questions about where I went to school, etc., (and then asked me the same question again and again) and then when a female acquaintance and I were talking to another guy, he started giving me vitals on the guy, which I found really weird and shocking because besides upon initially meeting, towards myself in particular he came across kind of moody, aloof and even arrogant. At the end of the night after our last outing, he asked me to sit where he was but I sat with my friend at another table instead. I was shocked here as well because of his standoffish behavior at our previous outings. In the last couple of weeks everyone's been chatting on social media about our fun activities and he always seems to insert himself into my conversations when I'm talking with someone else but never talks to me directly. In the last couple of days I've been ignoring him on social media and today he sent me an invitation to an upcoming party he's having at his home. I guess my question is, what is this dude's angle? I feel he's more aware of me than he lets on as he has also been copying everything I do on social media and it's kind of freaking me out. Why did he wait for me to ignore him for him to finally speak to me like an adult instead of in spurts? Should I be alarmed?
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted August 21, 2017 Posted August 21, 2017 Impossible to say. You could be reading too much into it. 2
Imported Posted August 21, 2017 Posted August 21, 2017 Ignore. Completely. Unless you wanted attention and then later complain about the attention you get. 2
rushed Posted August 21, 2017 Posted August 21, 2017 Could he possibly be on the autism spectrum? Try to keep that in mind when/if you turn him down. I would just continue to ignore him and if/when he tries to get your phone number or asks you out a simple, "I'm sorry, I'm not interested" would suffice. (My son is on the spectrum, so I've got a soft spot for autistic folks. A lot of the behavior you described sounds like it could be possible the guy is on the spectrum.) 2
Author LoveIsABattlefield36 Posted August 21, 2017 Author Posted August 21, 2017 Impossible to say. You could be reading too much into it. Thank you.
Author LoveIsABattlefield36 Posted August 21, 2017 Author Posted August 21, 2017 Ignore. Completely. Unless you wanted attention and then later complain about the attention you get. Unless I wanted attention?
Author LoveIsABattlefield36 Posted August 21, 2017 Author Posted August 21, 2017 Could he possibly be on the autism spectrum? Try to keep that in mind when/if you turn him down. I would just continue to ignore him and if/when he tries to get your phone number or asks you out a simple, "I'm sorry, I'm not interested" would suffice. (My son is on the spectrum, so I've got a soft spot for autistic folks. A lot of the behavior you described sounds like it could be possible the guy is on the spectrum.) Thanks. Not sure about autism but it's possible.
Scarlett.O'hara Posted August 21, 2017 Posted August 21, 2017 How is this guy a creep? Unless you have left out some other relevant details, he just sounds like a guy who has been acting a bit reserved because he is attracted to you, but finds you a bit intimidating. Now he actually trying to make an effort and you are basically calling him a weirdo. Poor guy can't win. If you aren't feeling him, that's fine, don't accept his invitation. Just try not to give him a hard time over it. 9
GemmaUK Posted August 21, 2017 Posted August 21, 2017 Sounds like he is trying to breed familiarity with you and is mirroring you on social media too. What he isn't doing is asking you out or saying he is interested which gives you no opportunity to say you are not interested. If you are not interested then carry on as you are, if he is constantly in your face and blocking others from interacting with you then the only thing you can really do is use body language to express you don't want him around you. 1
coolheadal Posted August 21, 2017 Posted August 21, 2017 I recently met this guy a few weeks ago at a group function with some mutual friends. Last week when we all hung out again he started asking me some questions about where I went to school, etc., (and then asked me the same question again and again) and then when a female acquaintance and I were talking to another guy, he started giving me vitals on the guy, which I found really weird and shocking because besides upon initially meeting, towards myself in particular he came across kind of moody, aloof and even arrogant. At the end of the night after our last outing, he asked me to sit where he was but I sat with my friend at another table instead. I was shocked here as well because of his standoffish behavior at our previous outings. In the last couple of weeks everyone's been chatting on social media about our fun activities and he always seems to insert himself into my conversations when I'm talking with someone else but never talks to me directly. In the last couple of days I've been ignoring him on social media and today he sent me an invitation to an upcoming party he's having at his home. I guess my question is, what is this dude's angle? I feel he's more aware of me than he lets on as he has also been copying everything I do on social media and it's kind of freaking me out. Why did he wait for me to ignore him for him to finally speak to me like an adult instead of in spurts? Should I be alarmed? Yes you should be alarmed.. Stalker well early signs of one. Warn him away with the suggestion of you contacting the local police or sheriff department. You tell him to back-off and leave you alone. If not you will file a police harassment report on him. You have not interest in him, do not say the word CREEP to him. Just make him go off on you. Tell your friends also what he's doing. So you have witness. Never give out personal details to you anyone you don't really know that well he's a stranger and a weirdo. 1
d0nnivain Posted August 21, 2017 Posted August 21, 2017 I don't think you have to be alarmed just yet but do be cautious & aware of him. Block him on social media so you can't see his posts & do not attend his party. He'll probably go away after that. If he doesn't then you can get alarmed At that point, you point blank tell him you are not interested & would be he please go away. If he doesn't then you consider stronger actions. 2
Author LoveIsABattlefield36 Posted August 21, 2017 Author Posted August 21, 2017 How is this guy a creep? Unless you have left out some other relevant details, he just sounds like a guy who has been acting a bit reserved because he is attracted to you, but finds you a bit intimidating. Now he actually trying to make an effort and you are basically calling him a weirdo. Poor guy can't win. If you aren't feeling him, that's fine, don't accept his invitation. Just try not to give him a hard time over it. Well, I guess I'm used to guys being more direct and his style/way of going about this if he is in fact interested, is sort of throwing me off. It feels weird and creepy to me because it's not what I'm used to. No, I won't give him a hard time over the invitation. I'm not like that.
stillafool Posted August 21, 2017 Posted August 21, 2017 Look if you have no interest in the guy just keep ignoring him and don't engage him in any way. It's pretty simple. 2
Author LoveIsABattlefield36 Posted August 21, 2017 Author Posted August 21, 2017 Sounds like he is trying to breed familiarity with you and is mirroring you on social media too. What he isn't doing is asking you out or saying he is interested which gives you no opportunity to say you are not interested. If you are not interested then carry on as you are, if he is constantly in your face and blocking others from interacting with you then the only thing you can really do is use body language to express you don't want him around you. Thank you, Gemma. I do feel the mirroring thing was to try and show me that we have stuff in common. Just a feeling in my gut. I don't do well with indirect types so left to my own devices I guess you can say that I can really conjure up some interesting thoughts.
Author LoveIsABattlefield36 Posted August 21, 2017 Author Posted August 21, 2017 Yes you should be alarmed.. Stalker well early signs of one. Warn him away with the suggestion of you contacting the local police or sheriff department. You tell him to back-off and leave you alone. If not you will file a police harassment report on him. You have not interest in him, do not say the word CREEP to him. Just make him go off on you. Tell your friends also what he's doing. So you have witness. Never give out personal details to you anyone you don't really know that well he's a stranger and a weirdo. Ok, I don't feel completely settled. When I ignored him on social media only then did he talk to me like a normal human being. Perhaps I'll take him off of my social media altogether. I'm surrounded by quite a few people in between us so I don't think he will go too far, and there's a healthy distance between where we both live, but I will keep everything you've said in mind. Thanks.
Author LoveIsABattlefield36 Posted August 21, 2017 Author Posted August 21, 2017 I don't think you have to be alarmed just yet but do be cautious & aware of him. Block him on social media so you can't see his posts & do not attend his party. He'll probably go away after that. If he doesn't then you can get alarmed At that point, you point blank tell him you are not interested & would be he please go away. If he doesn't then you consider stronger actions. Yea, someone else suggested I block him as well or put him on my restricted list. I actually don't think he will say anything to me about it once I do it which will be a good thing. 1
coolheadal Posted August 21, 2017 Posted August 21, 2017 Ok, I don't feel completely settled. When I ignored him on social media only then did he talk to me like a normal human being. Perhaps I'll take him off of my social media altogether. I'm surrounded by quite a few people in between us so I don't think he will go too far, and there's a healthy distance between where we both live, but I will keep everything you've said in mind. Thanks. Your welcome! One thing more just be careful because his mindset is not normal. Remember he can play nice and then he can change into the person you are creep out about.. 1
Author LoveIsABattlefield36 Posted August 21, 2017 Author Posted August 21, 2017 Your welcome! One thing more just be careful because his mindset is not normal. Remember he can play nice and then he can change into the person you are creep out about.. Ok, thank you.
Author LoveIsABattlefield36 Posted August 25, 2017 Author Posted August 25, 2017 Impossible to say. You could be reading too much into it. You might be right.
morrowrd Posted August 25, 2017 Posted August 25, 2017 The good thing about social media...especially if it's facebook, is that you can unfriend and block him. If you're serious about having zero interest in him, do that - now. Then learn the art of dismissal. He won't be the first guy on Earth to be rejected. 1
preraph Posted August 25, 2017 Posted August 25, 2017 He sounds sneaky to me. I mean, it's not huge red flags, but like him asserting himself into things, probably trying to discourage you from that guy, kind of taking the back door. I think he probably knows you're not very interested and so that accounts for some of his changes in approach, but what it should have done is make him leave you alone. And that's one reason it's a reason to be cautious. If you are not interested in him, you should stop being at all ambiguous and just act thoroughly uninterested and go ahead and block him from your social media and stay off his as well because he is focused on you and will interpret your mere presence as interest. Do not go to the party. I wouldn't reply to it. if you say you're busy, he might change the night or something! The short answer to your title question how to deal with a creep is : Don't. Cut off all communication and if they persist, tell them it's never going to happen and to stop. 1
Author LoveIsABattlefield36 Posted August 26, 2017 Author Posted August 26, 2017 The good thing about social media...especially if it's facebook, is that you can unfriend and block him. If you're serious about having zero interest in him, do that - now. Then learn the art of dismissal. He won't be the first guy on Earth to be rejected. I blocked him. Thank you.
Author LoveIsABattlefield36 Posted August 28, 2017 Author Posted August 28, 2017 He sounds sneaky to me. I mean, it's not huge red flags, but like him asserting himself into things, probably trying to discourage you from that guy, kind of taking the back door. I think he probably knows you're not very interested and so that accounts for some of his changes in approach, but what it should have done is make him leave you alone. And that's one reason it's a reason to be cautious. If you are not interested in him, you should stop being at all ambiguous and just act thoroughly uninterested and go ahead and block him from your social media and stay off his as well because he is focused on you and will interpret your mere presence as interest. Do not go to the party. I wouldn't reply to it. if you say you're busy, he might change the night or something! The short answer to your title question how to deal with a creep is : Don't. Cut off all communication and if they persist, tell them it's never going to happen and to stop. Thank you, preraph. I blocked him.
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