Author eez.honey Posted August 21, 2017 Author Posted August 21, 2017 You've answered your own question. He doesn't want to go at a glacial pace--he's not hung up on a past relationship, which is powerful enough that it directs his current behavior. Now, is this thread more about how you can manipulate him into doing what you want him to do? Is that your real question? Plenty of people have told you that this is incompatibility. Leave him be. You aren't up for the rigors of relationship; from what I can read, the best you can muster is friendship for an indeterminate amount of time. He might not want to invest his time being friendly with someone who doesn't know what she wants and is confused. Fish or cut bait. I stated what I wanted though. He asked about my past relationships and I told him. He even told me to not tell people about my past relationships because people will use it against me, yet he continued to want to see me after that. Sounds like manipulation on his part. Manipulation? I'm not manipulating him. I left him alone, I'm just asking g and trying to understand on the forum. I'm an analytical person so I like to analyze all sides. Plus I wasn't sure if I was thinking correctly so I came on here. I know what I want. I said I want to get to know someone. That means taking it slow and getting to see how their behavior is, the way hey think and etc. If it means delaying a kiss then let it be. I'm very straight to the point and I hate going around the bush.
Author eez.honey Posted August 21, 2017 Author Posted August 21, 2017 Text is not a way to get to know a person that is so impersonal at best. You need to talk over the phone. Text only if you have too. Don't do what you did with one guy verses the next guy never works out the same way. Everyone is different except for you. Well yeah. I tried that with other guys. They didn't like talking on the phone lol. I love talking on the phone but they'd rather text. Yes, I find texting very impresonable.
Miss Spider Posted August 21, 2017 Posted August 21, 2017 Haha I liked that part too. "I mean, he's not that ugly to where I wouldn't touch him" Sounds like a promising start to a lovely romance 2
coolheadal Posted August 21, 2017 Posted August 21, 2017 Well yeah. I tried that with other guys. They didn't like talking on the phone lol. I love talking on the phone but they'd rather text. Yes, I find texting very impresonable. You call me on the phone I will talk with you all day! LOL Okay until the cell battery goes dead.. LOL But yeah I ran into women who told me they rather text, but I do't want text buddy, text lover you want to talk and hear their voice. Impersonal text is the a good sign anyway..
Author eez.honey Posted August 21, 2017 Author Posted August 21, 2017 (edited) Haha I liked that part too. "I mean, he's not that ugly to where I wouldn't touch him" Sounds like a promising start to a lovely romance What!? Aha I mean this guys was nerdy. Like he's not your everyday clean cut stunner. But I loved the way he thinked rationally and his houghts on some issues. I know many people who didn't find their partner attractive at first but now they're the love of their life. :0 Edited August 21, 2017 by eez.honey
kendahke Posted August 21, 2017 Posted August 21, 2017 I know what I want. I said I want to get to know someone. That means taking it slow and getting to see how their behavior is, the way hey think and etc. If it means delaying a kiss then let it be. I'm very straight to the point and I hate going around the bush. This guy isn't the guy who wants to do this. That is what you're failing to recognize. And he's well within his rights to not want to. You're well within your rights to want to and that's why this isn't going to work out, hence him avoiding you. He's probably hoping you can catch a clue without him having to spell it out for you. BTW, it's "beating around the bush".
Author eez.honey Posted August 21, 2017 Author Posted August 21, 2017 This guy isn't the guy who wants to do this. That is what you're failing to recognize. And he's well within his rights to not want to. You're well within your rights to want to and that's why this isn't going to work out, hence him avoiding you. He's probably hoping you can catch a clue without him having to spell it out for you. BTW, it's "beating around the bush". I'm typing on a phone dear. Siri autocorrect me. I know he correct phrase. Second yeah I figured with the silence. That's why I came on here for advice because I wasn't understanding it. If he has to be that snarky and can't communicate it then good luck to him. I'd rather not date anyone like that anyways. Idk whybuou have to be so rude and condescending about it. But since you weren't there in person I'm just saying he gave off there impression that he wanted something serious down the line, not casual sex. That's why I was confused and misunderstood and came on here. He made it seem like anyone that hooked up automatically after not getting to know someone was weird, yet hats what he wanted?
Miss Spider Posted August 21, 2017 Posted August 21, 2017 Haha naw I'm teasing you. Just wear gloves. You'll be fine !
kendahke Posted August 21, 2017 Posted August 21, 2017 I'm typing on a phone dear. Siri autocorrect me. I know he correct phrase. Second yeah I figured with the silence. That's why I came on here for advice because I wasn't understanding it. If he has to be that snarky and can't communicate it then good luck to him. I'd rather not date anyone like that anyways. Idk whybuou have to be so rude and condescending about it. But since you weren't there in person I'm just saying he gave off there impression that he wanted something serious down the line, not casual sex. That's why I was confused and misunderstood and came on here. He made it seem like anyone that hooked up automatically after not getting to know someone was weird, yet hats what he wanted? I've not been rude or condescending. However, calling someone you don't know "dear" is condescending. I'm speaking plainly and directly with you, since you say you're confused about things. You're saying you want to go slow. He tried kissing you on the second date and you recoiled---no matter what the reason, even if it's a valid one, that is taken as rejection to most people. To avoid being embarrassed, he's put the brakes on, despite what he may have said to you. I don't have to be there to recognize plain human nature. None of us are there when posters come here and post about their experiences, but we all know human nature, at least those of us of a certain age with some life experience for which things like this do not leave us confused. Just sayin'.
Author eez.honey Posted August 21, 2017 Author Posted August 21, 2017 I've not been rude or condescending. However, calling someone you don't know "dear" is condescending. I'm speaking plainly and directly with you, since you say you're confused about things. You're saying you want to go slow. He tried kissing you on the second date and you recoiled---no matter what the reason, even if it's a valid one, that is taken as rejection to most people. To avoid being embarrassed, he's put the brakes on, despite what he may have said to you. I don't have to be there to recognize plain human nature. None of us are there when posters come here and post about their experiences, but we all know human nature, at least those of us of a certain age with some life experience for which things like this do not leave us confused. Just sayin'. Really? Because I actually sent a text yesterday to clarify if we were on the same page and he avoided me. But just now he sent me a picture. So he's avoiding me yet showing he has read my concern and chose to ignore talking about it. Idk seems like game playing to me. I hear you, I really do. But I'm not sure what his avoiding and giving me a hint to understand he's not interested yet he's sending me contact? Sounds like bs to me.
kendahke Posted August 21, 2017 Posted August 21, 2017 Really? Because I actually sent a text yesterday to clarify if we were on the same page and he avoided me. But just now he sent me a picture. So he's avoiding me yet showing he has read my concern and chose to ignore talking about it. Idk seems like game playing to me. I hear you, I really do. But I'm not sure what his avoiding and giving me a hint to understand he's not interested yet he's sending me contact? Sounds like bs to me. Sounds like you know what you need to do.
HarmonyDriven Posted August 22, 2017 Posted August 22, 2017 ....But just now he sent me a picture. I hope he did not send a downtown picture of himself? Some guys will send those type of pics......
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