Owl Posted August 17, 2005 Posted August 17, 2005 BB- C'mon...you know by now that Owl is ALWAYS right!! (Yeah right...if Owl was always right, he would have never had a reason to come to any of these boards, now would he?!?! ) Seriously, this fits the normal pattern of things. And the only way to break the pattern is to do something forceful. Most guys like this are 'dependent'...they get fixated on someone/something and just can't/won't let it go until it turns into something that they don't want. Which means that in order for this to end, you have to become something/someone he doesn't want anymore. The easiest way to do that is to lash out at him...make it clear that you DON'T want this, and that there will be consequences if he continues this behavior. That's why I suggested the HR threat... Good luck.
Author BoatingBabe Posted August 19, 2005 Author Posted August 19, 2005 He tried the jealous route yesterday, He had lunch with MY friend, then asked him to introduce him to a cute girl....and then he started coming on to her......... My friend told me he was obviously trying his hardest to make sure this info got back to me. I ran into him a couple of times after that and we both completely ignored eachother, and he is so angry at me, if looks could kill, I'd be dead. The jealousy thing will only work against him even more now....makes it easier for me to blow him off without any pity. The girl just thought he was weird because how could he blatanly come on to someone while wearing a wedding band....anyway, he just shrugged...but he knew this info will get back to me, and it did. Meanwhile, yesterday, a group of people asking me what I did to him, why did I break his spirit, why did I break his heart. I can't get away from this guy and his stupid little tricks
EnigmaXOXO Posted August 19, 2005 Posted August 19, 2005 ....makes it easier for me to blow him off without any pity. Absolutely. I've always believed that in order to see someone for who they truly were…you had to witness them during their worst of moments and not when they were putting on their best. Hopefully you can finally recognize what a slimy little weasel this guy really is…and not the sexy Prince Charming you envisioned him to be. can't get away from this guy and his stupid little tricks Yes you can - by not allowing him to effect you. Treat him with ambivalence. Pretend he's an invisible stranger and stop wasting so much of your energy caring and responding to what he says and does. Difficult --- but doable.
Author BoatingBabe Posted August 19, 2005 Author Posted August 19, 2005 Originally posted by EnigmaXOXO Hopefully you can finally recognize what a slimy little weasel this guy really is…and not the sexy Prince Charming you envisioned him to be. I agree, but why the big act at work, him sulking and sad, and not his usual joking and taunting....Everyone is noticing his change in personality...and I'm sure he knows he's different as well....If he wants me to think he's already chasing other skirts, I'd think he'd stop acting like a cry baby and pretend to be the stud that he isn't.
LucreziaBorgia Posted August 19, 2005 Posted August 19, 2005 Not only that, but he is convincing everyone you are the bad guy in all this. You are definitely going to want to watch your back now.
EnigmaXOXO Posted August 19, 2005 Posted August 19, 2005 I agree, but why the big act at work, him sulking and sad, and not his usual joking and taunting....Everyone is noticing his change in personality...and I'm sure he knows he's different as well.... People don't change their inherent personalities over night. THIS is the real deal. The substance under the surface. The snake is finally shedding his skin.
Author BoatingBabe Posted August 19, 2005 Author Posted August 19, 2005 Originally posted by LucreziaBorgia Not only that, but he is convincing everyone you are the bad guy in all this. You are definitely going to want to watch your back now. Not sure about that...The guys are calling me a "heartbreaker" but the gals are telling me I did the right thing and I had to break it off.... When one of the guys told me I broke his heart, I responded by saying...he has a wife to heal it for him...and he sort of nodded in agreement. I think if anything, I got respect back by refusing to engage in this sort of thing with a married man. I think it shows integrity and honor...2 things foreign to him... He is in shock because he probably got what he wanted in the past, (he is a VERY goodlooking guy) and my stopping this is confusing to him. I remember him saying he has 20 women at any given time offering themselves to him, knowing that he is married....well, time for him to snatch up those 20 women..lol Funny how they always want the one who doesn't want them...
Author BoatingBabe Posted August 20, 2005 Author Posted August 20, 2005 Today one of the girls runs up to me and goes...MM had his wife come here for lunch...He was walking her around introducing her....nice huh? He's being a vindictive little ****er now....ignoring me and all my staff at work and walking around with a grin knowing all this will get back to me....Funny how a week ago he was a movie theatre with me, with his ring OFF and how he's contemplating separation....and now that I called it off...he's parading his wife around the workplace to rub it in my face. So much for this 'friendship' we had...it's obvious to me even more he was just out to get in my pants, and since that plan failed..now he's gonna rub my nose in his marriage.......he can kiss mybutt when he comes crawling back months from now trying to be my "friend". And here I was feeling BAD about hurting him....he doesn't feel BAD about rubbing my nose into his marriage.... I don't know why, but this low blow from him really bothered me today...
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