Haven't heard from Boyfriend in two days

[smackie9]

I think he snuck off to Fort Lauderdale with his bros to have some fun in the beach party sun.

[Purepony]

Maybe he's one of the un football players that got arrested ?

[Usename12]

If I sent a text and it wasn't replied in a couple of days, I'd send one more just to make sure it wasn't a lost message. Then again, if you are bf/gf and he goes days without saying hi regardless of whether you sent anything, it could be his interest is low. One text saying things are well takes all of 30 seconds.

 

If he got his phone taken or it was lost, he should explain that. But if he just says it's all good, well...maybe you jumped the gun with the bf/gf thing. Seems like you don't really know the guy.

[diddilybop]

I messaged him and he replied. It seems that he has been working hard. Good for him. I told him I was worried and he asked why. I have nothing else to say to him at this point. I just wanted to know that he is alive and well.

 

yeah, i don't want to make any decisions for you but you're clearly not in his thoughts, which sucks. it's only been a few weeks in your relationship, right? imagine if he treated you like this all the time for years? he's not worth your time.

[whatnot]

I messaged him and he replied. It seems that he has been working hard. Good for him. I told him I was worried and he asked why. I have nothing else to say to him at this point. I just wanted to know that he is alive and well.

delete hope things go well for you Edited August 11, 2017 by whatnot

[coolheadal]

I started dating this guy a few weeks ago. He is a football player in University. He has football training camp that starts today. I messaged him on Tuesday telling him about a dream i had about him. Didn't get a reply.

 

It's Thursday and i still haven't heard from him. What do you think i should do? I have no intention of messaging him. I do not think it is a good idea. My gut tells me not to so i won't. Also i messaged him last, so i think it is better to not message him again until i get a reply. Please let me know what your thoughts are.

 

Sounds like he's very busy? But you see it he was really interested in you as much as you are with him, he would make it possible to get a message to you. No excuse not too. Unless cell phone communications was blacked out by his coach. I doubt it.. Don't text or call, just let sleepy dogs lay in wait!

[kendahke]

I messaged him and he replied. It seems that he has been working hard. Good for him. I told him I was worried and he asked why. I have nothing else to say to him at this point. I just wanted to know that he is alive and well.

 

I think you should have told him the truth instead of building this wall of resentment due to unspoken expectations because the unspoken rest after his "why?" question is "what are you worried about?" and the answer is "I don't trust you to remember me when I'm not around", because that is what this is about.

 

If he's at football camp and it's intensive and going til the 21st, then it's reasonable to believe that he's dead dog tired at the end of being out in the August heat and humidity, training for season all day; and he waited til he could give you conversation where he can be present, as you'd expect him to be, instead of being distracted, sleepy, grumpy, non-communicative.

 

I seriously doubt he's sneaking off to party behind your back especially if he's had to plunk money down in order to attend this camp.

[LoverOfDance]

@Kendahke I really like this man. I believe he is a good person and has a good heart and this is why i agreed to date him. I don't believe he is doing anything other than football training camp right now. I agree with what you said about me building a wall of resentment. I sent him a message an hour ago to explain why I was worried.

 

He has not replied. I understand the situation and I believe i should let him be for now. I think things will be a little better after camp.

Edited August 11, 2017 by LoverOfDance

[Gaeta]

I think you should have told him the truth instead of building this wall of resentment due to unspoken expectations because the unspoken rest after his "why?" question is "what are you worried about?" and the answer is "I don't trust you to remember me when I'm not around", because that is what this is about.

 

If he's at football camp and it's intensive and going til the 21st, then it's reasonable to believe that he's dead dog tired at the end of being out in the August heat and humidity, training for season all day; and he waited til he could give you conversation where he can be present, as you'd expect him to be, instead of being distracted, sleepy, grumpy, non-communicative.

 

I seriously doubt he's sneaking off to party behind your back especially if he's had to plunk money down in order to attend this camp.

A bit of nuance here. She contacted him Tuesday and football camp started Thursday. He had Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday am to reply. Now we are learning he can use his phone so he ignored her text 4 days in a row. One of those days being football camp.

[d0nnivain]

@Kendahke I really like this man. I believe he is a good person and has a good heart and this is why i agreed to date him. I don't believe he is doing anything other than football training camp right now. I agree with what you said about me building a wall of resentment. I sent him a message an hour ago to explain why I was worried.

 

He has not replied. I understand the situation and I believe i should let him be for now. I think things will be a little better after camp.

 

You do understand that you rank below football in his life. If you are OK with that, continue.

 

Going forward consider communicating angst, feelings & worry through voice not message. Text messages are a bad way to communicate important nuanced information or feelings because you lose all non-verbal communications.

[elaine567]

A bit of nuance here. She contacted him Tuesday and football camp started Thursday. He had Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday am to reply. Now we are learning he can use his phone so he ignored her text 4 days in a row. One of those days being football camp.

 

Agreed and no matter how "tired" he was, it takes seconds to send

"I'm going to bed, too tired to think, love you xx"

 

I also doubt that coaches just remove phones without giving the guys some time to contact loved ones to say why they will not be able to contact them.

[LivingWaterPlease]

LoverofDance, thought I posted yesterday but guess I didn't. I wouldn't be concerned a bit about him not staying in close touch during football camp.

 

There have been times when my life has been so intense that I wouldn't even be checking my phone for texts. Especially when having lots of people around me for work. And other times, too.

 

I have even thought during some of those times how it would be hard to explain the extent of how busy I was to someone else. So busy no time to grab a bite...so busy other essential things go by the wayside.

 

I'd be very surprised if they didn't keep these guys super busy and if the guys aren't so exhausted they don't have much energy left for much besides working out/practicing.

 

Hang in there, Girl! This guy likes you a lot or he wouldn't have asked you to be his girlfriend! If possible, try to keep your thoughts of concern to yourself if he contacts you again while he's there at camp. It will make you seem more confident which translates to attractive! This is not to say you should be gamey or not share things with him. You can talk with him about it after he gets home and also you can develop a sense of the rhythm of communication you guys will have together as time goes on!

Edited August 11, 2017 by LivingWaterPlease

[diddilybop]

yes, he's super busy now and he may have more time to be in contact with you after camp but it literally takes 10-20 seconds to write a sweet and thoughtful text. even when he finally replied to your message, it didn't seem like there was much to it. he may be a nice guy but he sounds like a not so great boyfriend right now. keep yourself busy in the meantime by doing your own thing and hanging out with friends so you're not so preoccupied with him and what he's up to.

[Miss Spider]

Guy doesn't respond to texts for days while he's away at training camp or something. "Girl, he's clearly pounding 3 cheerleaders rn. He's probably lied about where's at, too. he's a dog, I'm telling you" This is part of why I hate cell phones. If you're spending time away from your partner, wanting some time alone, or not sending real time updates, you're obviously up to no good. "So you're saying you can p*** but you can't text me back?????"

 

 

I miss the days where we sent missives that took weeks to arrive.

Edited August 11, 2017 by Cookiesandough

[LivingWaterPlease]

Keep us posted, LOD, interested in how you're doing!

[Gr8fuln2020]

No ones life is SO intense or involved that he/she cannot send a quick 10 second text or more. People sleep, go potty, eat and there's plenty of down time to respond back to SOs. He's up to something else or something has happened to him.

 

No one is too busy to send a quick text during the 24-hours of each day.

[LoverOfDance]

@livingwaterplease 3 and half months later and we are broken up. He says he has feelings but they are not strong. My gut told me something wasn't quite right from the beginning. I guess I should have listened.

[hunk]

College football player? Oh dear this is going to be brutal :lmao:

[jennyanydot]

@livingwaterplease 3 and half months later and we are broken up. He says he has feelings but they are not strong. My gut told me something wasn't quite right from the beginning. I guess I should have listened.

 

So sorry to hear that. But glad he did not waste much of your time.